


Knight in shining armor

by AngelKurenai



Category: Merlin - Fandom, Supernatural, The Hollow Crown - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Forbidden love story, Knight, Knight!Dean, Medieval AU, Princess - Freeform, Princess!Reader, Smut, at some point, with whom you'll have to wait to see, yeah - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-30
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-04-28 22:31:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 71,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5107997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelKurenai/pseuds/AngelKurenai





	1. Chapter 1

The constant knocking on your door made you groan in frustration. You covered your head with the blankets but no change was made nonetheless. The knocking only continued and you found yourself cursing under your breath at whoever it was- Well, you had a pretty good idea as to who it was but that did not make you want to open the door anyway.  
  
"My princess, it's time for you to get up" yep and sure as hell you heard Anna's, rather cheerful (considering the time of the day), voice say from the other side of the door.  
  
With another groan you pulled the covers off your head and glared daggers at the still closed door. It was still closed and Anna had not entered yet because you had told her so a while ago. Many times for that matter. She had this tendency, like every other maid in the castle, to just barge in after a few knocks and pull the curtains open to let the light get in even if you still were asleep. She had done this many times before and every time you were grumpy for the rest of the day just because you had been woken up abruptly. After a while you've had enough and told her that if she wanted to get into your room then she should wait for you to tell her so.  
  
"Come in Anna" you said, running a hand through your hair to comb them just a little bit.  
  
Without even-so-waiting for you to tell her a second time she opened the door and came inside in a rush, a few more maids accompanying her as usual. And, as expected, she immediately made you get up and they all started treating you like the princess you were.  
  
Princess.  
  
When you were younger you clearly remember longing for all of this, or well sort of. You longed for the big fluffy dresses, the tiaras, the balls and dancing there with a prince. It all seemed so perfect in your childlike eyes and up to a point they were. But you actually got to realize there was a bitter part to all of these. Being the princess - the only one at that, since your were the king's and queen's only child - had its perks but it definitely had its downsides as well. There were moments that you felt as if you were being suppressed or where under restriction. That you could not be who you wanted to, that you were not free or allowed to express yourself openly. You found yourself all the time following some sort of rule that in your opinion was actually stupid.  
  
Being the kingdom's only princess also meant that everybody else had high expectations of you and that actually was something that scared you. You never thought that you were good enough and you always believed that you were going to end up disappointing them. Sure you wanted some day to be a great queen, just like your mother, but you always felt that you were going to do something and screw it all up. It scared you and you were actually afraid to even admit it. Everybody just expected you to take up after your parents and actually be as good as them but you knew that no matter how much you tried you were not going to, because, simply, you were not them. You were just  _you_.  
  
Princess.  
  
That was a title you had come to loath at some point of your life. You found it hard, almost impossible, to cope with all of the 'must's and 'must not's. How could you? It was hard as it was to be in the royal family but at the same time being a princess  - the only one let's not forget - was much harder. You remember your childhood being normal, as much as it could be with having five servants all to yourself - what kind of normal kid did? But when you started getting older that's when the problems began. Not only when you could not see eye to eye with your father, no. You were not going to deny that you usually argued for some matters but you knew that he cared for you and loved you just like you did. But it was also your behavior at times that caused trouble.  
  
It was - as your father would usually say - inappropriate for you to behave like some common girl when you were a princess. Who could blame you, though? All those rules and restrictions got on your nerves at some point. There were moments that you felt as if you could not breath.  
  
Like now for example.  
  
"Ow" you groaned and huffed as one of the maids tightened even more - if possible - the corset around you.  
  
"My apologies, princess" she murmured.  
  
"No, it's ok. Just- just loosen it up a little bit. I can't breath" you managed to say and immediately let out a sigh of relief as you felt her do as you told her.  
  
"A lot better" you breathed out.  
  
"You came earlier today" you noted as the maids helped you put your dress on.  
  
"Yes, well the queen asked for you to get up earlier because she wanted to talk with you" Anna was quick to reply.  
  
"Mom? Why? Did she tell you what it was about?" you frowned at her words.  
  
"No, princess. But she told me to escort you to her once you were ready because she had something very important to tell you. I do not know any more details, though. She said that you will discuss that over breakfast" she said and you gave her a small nod.  
  
"It's probably about dad's return" you muttered.  
  
"It could probably be. Our king has been gone for over a year now. You must miss him" she said and you nodded at her words again.  
  
"Yeah" you said with a small smile.  
  
It was true that your father was gone for over a year now. He was in France fighting to take over some places there. You didn't know much, other than the fact that he was actually helping a friend of his. In the beginning it was supposed to be just a few battles but it soon turned into a war and your dad had to stay there longer than needed. He would send you letters, that of course came to you later than he had written them, and let you know how he was but neither you nor your mother would stop worrying about him. He had his knights with him, the most skillful ones and the ones that you knew would protect him with their own lives, but you couldn't help the worry that itched inside you when you got to think where he was.  
  
When the letter of him telling you that they had succeeded in winning came to you, you felt a huge weight lift off your shoulders. He was your father and you loved him, no matter what.  
  
The letter had come to you just a week ago as he - and you - had guessed he would be back by today. That did not only mean that you would to see him again - you were definitely happy about that - but that you would also have to help your mother in the organization of the celebration in favor of their victory. Well, at least it wouldn't be a ball that you would have to attend either you wanted or not. Sure they were fun sometimes but after a point they just got boring. Therefore you were happy to know that the 'feast' your mother was talking about was a luxurious meal for the royal members of the family and of course your father's most trusted knights - that were the ones that were always by his side as well.  
  
"Alright, we're done princess" Anna said with a smile and looking at yourself in the mirror you gave her a small approving nod.  
  
"We better get going. Don't want the queen waiting for long" she said again and you only gave her a small nod as you made your way to the door.  
  
After giving a few instructions to the rest of the maids on cleaning your room she came to you and you both made your way the King's and Queen's royal chambers.  
  
~~~  
  
"Would you like anything else, my Queen?" the older maid asked, bowing respectively in front of your mother.  
  
"No, no everything is fine. I don't want to tire you anymore" your mother replied with a smile.  
  
"Oh but you are not tiring me my queen. It is my pleasure to serve you. It has always been." she replied ever so kindly. And it was the truth. All of the servants - well, at least most of them - loved you parents, your mother most, because they were not like other kings and queens. They were both thoughtful of their well-beings and cared about them despite the fact that they were just their servants.  
  
"I know, dear. But I believe it is time for you to relax for a little bit. Do not worry, I am going to be fine." your mother said and with a final smile and bow she, along with the rest of the maids, were out of the room.  
  
Leaving just you and your mother alone.  
  
You let out a small sigh of relief once everybody was out of the room and relaxed. Your body was stiff and straight just a few moments ago but now that it was just you and your mother you knew that you did not have to pretend.  
  
"So what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?" you asked as you both took a seat on the chairs next to the table that had been set up for the two of you on the balcony for your breakfast.  
  
"Is it about dad coming back today? Is something wrong with the preparations we did?" you asked again and she shook her head.  
  
"No, no. It's not that. Everything is alright and set up for your father's arrival. It's just..." she trailed off, looking down at her food.  
  
"Mom? What is it? Did something happen?"  
  
"No, no dear. It's just that... it's your birthday's in two weeks." she said and you gave her a reluctant nod.  
  
"Yes, I am very much aware of that. I just don't understand what your point is"  
  
"Well, my point is that- Honey, you become 23 in just a couple days and..." she trailed off once again.  
  
"And?" you asked.  
  
"And you have yet to find a prince to marry" she said and you immediately groaned.  
  
"Not you too, mom"  
  
"I know, I know and I'm sorry dear. I know I sound like your father but don't you think it is time for you to find a prince and have a family? The normal is for you to be married at your 19th birthday yet we've put off that wedding for a long time" she said voice-ever-so-calm.  
  
"Well, yes that is the norm but I've told you mom. I don't want to marry someone just because that's what you or everybody else expects me to do. I want to get married to someone that I will love. To someone that I will know well before I take the decision to spend the rest of my life with. Because I actually want to be happy. And, yes, I know that when you were my age you already were married to dad, in love and happy but don't forget that you knew him for a long while before you got married and had feelings for him. Don't expect me now to just say yes to marrying someone just because that's what I am expected to do" you said and let out a sigh.  
  
"Oh I know, honey. And I absolutely support you. That's why I'm not forcing someone on you. I was just saying. Your father and I are getting older and older with each day passing. Soon we won't be able to rule the kingdom as we did and you will have to take over. You need a man by your side to do so in the right way" she put a comforting hand on top of yours.  
  
"I know mom, but please- I- I don't want to talk about it. Not until I know that there is someone that I have feelings for- that I truly love." you muttered and after giving you a silent nod you both proceeded to eat your breakfast in peace.  
  
A peace that did not last long and was soon broken by the trumpets being heard.  
  
"The King, my ladies! The King has returned!" one of the messengers came quickly through the door and straight to you.  
  
"Dad" you breathed out with a smile.  
  
An even bigger one appeared on your mother's face as you both quickly got up and rushed out of the room. You rushed down the corridors and ran down the marble stairs to make your way as fast as possible towards him. And of course having picked up your rather long dresses to not trip over.  
  
You both ran as fast as you could towards the now opened big doors of he castle to see the cheering crowd outside, clapping at your father and the rest of his soldiers as they walked through them on top of their horses. Your father on top of his white one stood out as he was on the front, in between two of his, as you guessed, most trusted knights. A bright smile was on his face as he waved at the cheering crowd, big smiles were on their faces as well. You couldn't help but smile and giggle just slightly, clapping along with the rest of them, in a way of trying to congratulate your father and the rest of his soldiers for making it out not only alive but victorious as well.  
  
Your eyes were focused on your father for a long while, as much as you could see him because he was still quite far away but the more close they all got the more clearly you could see him... and the person next to him.  
  
He had his head bowed in the beginning but you could see a smile playing on his lips. It only got bigger as, once he looked up and around the crowd, he looked ahead of him and right at you. The grin disappeared and in its place you saw a much softer one, not the playful one that was before. He was certainly something unique, you had never seen a man like him before and that said something with all the princess your parents had brought over to you to meet while trying to get you married to one of them. They could not compare to this man. Not even in the slightest bit. His eyes held something in them that you wanted more than anything to be able to know. He looked broken but at the same time you could see a surprisingly interesting and captivating glint in his eyes that just made you want to know him more. There was something about the way he carried himself- or well, the way he stood on top of his horse.  
  
The closer he got the more you got to study his features. Short, dirty blond and slightly spiky hair, strong jaw and full lips. Skin slightly tanned, a few wounds visible and a little dirt as well but you guessed it was just because he had not had time to clean properly. His green eyes were the ones that managed to capture your attention. Staring so intensely into yours that it felt as if he was trying to read you. A look of awe was on his face as if he was looking something that he had never seen before and truly found astounding. The thing was, he was looking at  _you_.  
  
And it did something to you that had never happened before. He made your heart skip a beat. Your breath hitched on your throat as you felt yourself captivated by the stranger's (at least to you) gaze. No, you were actually captivated by...  _him_.  
  
Well, this was definitely something new.


	2. Chapter 2

You clapped along with your mother as your father and the rest of the soldiers got closer to the castle. The villagers around them cheering for their victory. You were doing the same though you could not deny that your mind was not entirely on that but on the man next to your father. You had never seen him before but that was not surprising when you got to think of how you never intervened in his matters or never really cared to know the people he worked with.  
  
"My Queen" your father breathed out with a smile as he enveloped your mother in his arms, her not missing a beat to wrap hers around him.  
  
You had not even realized when they had come to you, much less when he had gotten off his horse.  
  
"Oh (Y/f/n)" she said with a wide smile.  
  
You were looking at them but couldn't help and steal glances occasionally at the green-eyed man. He had gotten off his horse as well but stood just a few steps behind your father. His eyes seemed to not be leaving your form and whenever you caught him staring he would quickly avert them trying not to be too obvious. Something that you were trying to do as well but were obviously failing at, miserably.  
  
"(Y/n)" your father said once he pulled away from your mother. He turned to look at you and you smiled as well. Turning your head from the man - although you didn't really want to - to look at you father.  
  
"Daddy" you said with a big smile and jumped into his arms, his chest shook as he let out a deep chuckle.  
  
"I missed you too, dear" he said with a deep laugh.  
  
"Welcome back" you said once you pulled away from and he nodded, kissing the top of your head.  
  
You couldn't help but glance even for a second over your father's shoulder, wanting to look once again at the man. He had you captivated that was for sure.  
  
Your father caught your eye, though, and immediately spoke "Oh yes, you have not met him before."  
  
He moved slightly to the side and motioned for the green-eyed knight to move forward. He seemed a little bit taken aback but not at all reluctant to walk forward towards you. You fidgeted with your hands and dress as he walked the few stairs closer to you, his eyes not leaving yours even for a split second.  
  
"(Y/n), this is Dean Winchester. My most trusted knight. Dean, please meet my daughter I'm sure you've heard about." he said with a smile, all the while yours and Dean's eyes were locked.  
  
"Pleasure to meet you, Dean" you said extending your hand towards him.  
  
"Pleasure is all mine... princess" he said and you had to hide the disappointment in your eyes when instead of (Y/n) he said 'princess'. Mostly because you would have given anything to hear your name roll off his lips, especially if he was to say it in that deep and rough voice of his.  
  
You couldn't stop the blush from rising, though, as he took hold of your hand and kissed it. A tingling sensation rising and making you bite your lip to keep the big smile from spreading. All the while his eyes were locked with yours and you slowly, but surely, felt yourself running out of breath because of his intense gaze.  
  
"Alright-" your father broke your staring "-Now that you've met let's get inside. Dean-" he turned to look him, Dean letting go of your hand (you would be lying if you said you didn't miss his touch already) "-you know what you have to do. Please follow the orders I previously gave you. My speech will take place in two hours from now." your father simply stated and Dean gave him a small bow.  
  
"As you wish my King" he said and with a final smile your father put a hand on your, and your mother's, shoulders and turned you so that you would get inside the castle.  
  
You couldn't help but have your head turned to look at Dean even as the doors were slowly closing behind you. His figure was still bowed but just before you could lose completely sight of him you saw him look up at you and a smirk play on his lips. You were not sure if he had indeed smirked at you, a playful hint to that as well, but you did not have time to see much more as the doors closed behind you.  
  
You tried to hide the look of disappointment and turned your head to look ahead of you.  
  
"I should better go to my room now" you said and gave your father a final hug "Welcome back again, dad" you kissed his cheek before pulling away.  
  
"Alright but make sure you are there for my speech, ok?" he was quick to say and you nodded.  
  
"I will be there dad, don't worry"  
  
"Oh and (Y/n)!" he said, stopping you again before you could go anywhere.  
  
"Yeah?" you asked.  
  
"Be sure to get ready for tonight and wear something beautiful." you nodded a his words.  
  
"Don't worry dad, I will" you said and with that you left them on their own to make their way to their room where your father would manage to relax a little bit before his speech.  
  
You did not really understand the need as to why he had to make a speech in front of the villagers every time he returned from a battle or war but you did not question it either. You did not care about having to hear him talk about war, death, life and whatnot, for a good while at that, as long as you got to have him back every time.  
  
~~~  
  
The rest of the day along with your father's - you had to admit - rather boring speech passed by luckily quickly. You thought it would be boring but it was not anything like that. On the contrary the thought of a certain knight had you smiling like an idiot all the time.  
  
Even when you tried reading a book you couldn't help but think about him. Your mind seemed to only be drifting to those green orbs that had your heart all of a sudden beating like a mad. The few words you had exchanged kept being replayed in your head as you only wished to hear that voice once again. Hell, your only thought at the moment was to see him again. You could not realize what was happening to you, what he was doing, but at the same time you did not want to. You did not care to know what it was that he was making you feel because it felt amazing, and that was the most important of all.  
  
And at least you had gotten part of your wish coming true, right?  
  
Just when you had returned after your father's speech you had started reading a book but, much like now, you had had no such luck and only ended up reading two lines and the rest of the time thinking about Dean. At some point you've had enough and felt as if you needed air, the corset probably had something to do with it, so you walked to your balcony. The view was always something that you loved about your room, that's why you would not change it no matter what. You could see the back of the castle, the garden and various fields with green grass and others with flowers as well. It was something beautiful indeed but not as much beautiful as the person that happened to be walking through it at that moment.  
  
Dean was obviously taking a stroll, enjoying the fresh air and the warmth of the sun. You had immediately spotted him walking close and under your balcony. His head was down as he looked at a small rock. He was kicking it with his feet as he walked. His hands behind his back and someone could have thought that he was sulking about something. The smile on his lips said otherwise and you just realized he was in deep thought. Something pleasant running through his mind, though, considering how he was biting his lip to keep the smile from getting even bigger. He let out a soft chuckle to himself that was barely audible.  
  
You rested your chin on your palm and looked at him for a good while. You let out a soft giggle when he once again kicked the small rock and even though you did not expect it he heard you. His head snapped up to your direction and he just looked at you for a while with a smile on his face. A calm expression was on your face as well as a smile. You looked down at him, not really knowing what to say; biting your lip in concentration. Still with a small smile Dean gave you a small bow, as if recognizing your presence, and despite everything you felt yourself frown at the gesture.  
  
Of course he would bow. You were the princess. The king's daughter. And he was a simple soldier.  
  
The smile fell from your lips and with a small shake of your head, not really because of Dean but because of everything else, you abruptly turned and walked inside your room.  
  
 _What you missed though was the frown that set on Dean's face and the deep look of hurt in his eyes as he watched you walk away from him.. His heart, even though he did not want to, aching to see you just... ignore him. That's how he could only describe it. He bit his lip and shook his head as of a way to shake of the weird feeling in his chest. It certainly meant no good._  
  
You let out another frustrated groan and slummed your face in your pillow as the thoughts kept swimming through your mind. You both loved and hated the feeling he was giving you but you knew that you were not going to get rid of it so easily - if never, whatsoever.  
  
You laid there on your bed for a good while thinking of how you felt. Was it even possible? You didn't know the man at all. How could he have your heart beating so rapidly with just a smile of his? You had just met him this morning and he already had you feeling like this for him? Sure, it was the first time a man actually made you feel this way and all of these feelings were foreign to you but you were no fool anyway.  
  
You knew it was something that you could not deny but at the same time you wanted to. It was not right, after all. You were a princess and he was just a knight, what could come from that? But the feeling inside you got all the more intense even if you tried to suppress it. Maybe there was no harm in it after all. Maybe it was just your imagination and all of the things you were feeling at this moment were nothing but a fragment of your imagination. Something that was just temporary and would soon be over.  
  
Sure you could enjoy it while it lasted, because let's be honest it felt amazing, but then it would be over soon, right? Besides, there was no way he would feel that way about you. To him you were just the princess. The king's daughter. Nothing more.  
  
A knock on the door interrupted your thoughts and with a sigh you got up from your bed. You put your long-ago-forgotten book on your nightstand and took a look of yourself in the mirror. Your cheeks were slightly flushed and your lower lip slightly bleeding. Something that did not really surprise as you had stopped biting it while thinking about Dean.  
  
 _What the hell is wrong with me?!_  you wanted to scream at yourself but only thought of it frustrated.  
  
Letting out another frustrated groan you soothed down your dress, combed quickly through your hair and after you made sure you were presentable you walked to the door where Anna surely awaited you to escort you to the dining room where the meal would be held.  
  
The person that you saw as soon as you opened the door was surely not Anna.  
  
"Dean?" you breathed out and a small smile appeared on his lips.  
  
"What are you doing here?" you felt a frown set on your face mostly because the damn feeling that you had been trying to avoid appeared on your chest just the second you locked eyes with the handsome knight.  
  
"Your father asked me to escort you to them. He said it would be more appropriate if his most trusted knight was next to his daughter rather than a simple maid. This is a meal to celebrate a war victory. So here I am" he said with a half smile.  
  
"You are going to be joining the dinner?" it was a stupid question to ask because you already knew the answer.  
  
"Yes, princess." he nodded his head "Now how about we get going, don't want to keep the king waiting long or else he might think we did something." he said with a chuckle and a wink, obviously trying to lighten the mood.  
  
You felt heat rush in your cheeks and looking down you gave him a small nod. You closed the door behind you and turned to him. You slowly took his offered hand, linking arms with his and took in a deep breath, knowing fully well that this was going to be hard.


	3. Chapter 3

You walked with Dean in silence for a while. You were biting your lip constantly thinking of something to say, anything to avoid the awkward silence.  
  
"So you've been one of my father's knights for a long time?" you asked out of the blue.  
  
It sounded stupid to you and you were praying he would not sense your awkwardness and slight discomfort. He obviously didn't as he just smiled with a small nod.  
  
"Yes, princess. I've actually been on this castle for most part of my life" he said, glancing for a while at you.  
  
"But don't you have a family. If you don't mind me asking"  
  
"Yes, yes I do. But when in his search for more soldiers your father came at my village I just... I couldn't let him take my younger brother so I volunteered myself" he said as if it was the most simple thing in the world.  
  
"So you basically... sacrificed yourself to save your brother?" you asked again and earned a nod from him.  
  
"That's really... heroic and selfless of you to do" you said in awe and he just let out a chuckle.  
  
"Not really. I wouldn't say so. I just did what I felt like. I know that little Sammy was meant for greater things and I wasn't wrong, after all." he said with what could only be described as a proud smile.  
  
"Well, it is good to know that he has someone that would do anything for him. Wish I had somebody as well" you mostly mumbled the last part to yourself, looking down as you walked.  
  
"Then I guess you're lucky as well 'cause you got me. I would anything for you, princess" he said with a small smirk and you bit your lip to keep the smile from getting bigger.  
  
"Glad to know that" your voice was low as you looked at him and he gazed back at you with a smile. He realized that he had been staring at you for quite long, though, so clearing his throat he immediately averted his eyes from yours.  
  
"But I promise you that if you do something like that when it comes to me-" you started and he piped in.  
  
"Sacrifice myself for you?"  
  
You nodded "Yes, if you ever decide to do something so stupid as that mind my words, you are never going to hear the end of it." you said and he let out a chuckle.  
  
"Very well then. I will have it in mind, princess" he said with a smirk.  
  
"You better should" you said just as playfully "But I was just wondering. How come I have not seen you this entire time? I mean, sure I don't just hang out with my father's knight but I know I have gotten to see most of them. Not you though"  
  
"Probably because you don't just hang out at the training areas. I mean, yeah, I am your father's right hand but when we're not on a battle or on war I spend most of time helping in training the newest soldiers. We have new ones every year and they need training. Kids barely know how to hold a sword properly let alone use it."  
  
"Yeah, but as you said they're  _kids_ " you pointed out.  
  
"True but so was I and so was everybody else that came with me when your father asked for soldiers. Don't get me wrong, princess, living here is actually better even if we have to fight. Most of us barely had food to make it by and your father is kind enough to give us money on top, to send to our families. But I'm telling you, when you want to be a knight you have to know the basics." he shrugged.  
  
"I guess you're right" you mumbled.  
  
"And we, believe me, are considered lucky. Taking into account how your father rarely chooses to fight but prefers talking over issues first"  
  
"That's one good thing about my father" you said with a small shrug "But-" you turned to look at Dean "-Don't you miss them? My dad's been gone for over a year and I missed him like crazy. I can't imagine how it would be to have to see them for years"  
  
"It is hard, trust me. But I've learned to manage. It was me or Sam, and that was not an option for me. At least your father was kind enough to give us a choice instead of just taking someone he wanted"  
  
"I see" you nodded "But I am sure they miss you as well. Leaving so many people behind that you knew and loved is hard. Your mother. Your father. Your brother... Your girl." you hesitated to say the last part but did so anyway.  
  
You actually were scared to hear what Dean would say because you were mostly scared to hear him verify it. Not that it would be surprising, after all. He was the perfect type of man. Caring, as it seemed, selfless,  funny and let's not forget handsome. What kind of woman would let him just pass by.  
  
He let out a chuckle and shook his head "No, no girl."  
  
"No girl? Really? Wow that's- that's hard to believe" you said, letting out a sigh of relief you didn't know you were holding.  
  
"Not really. I mean yeah I've had my moments but- when it comes to an actual relationship I kinda... suck" he said and you both laughed "Besides-" he let out a sad sigh "- I don't think I'm made for that"  
  
"Why would you say that?" you asked with a frown.  
  
"I ruin everything I touch. Honestly sometimes I think I'm cursed. I try hard, you know, but never succeed and everybody just expects so much from me" he shook his head looking down.  
  
"You tell me" you mumbled.  
  
"'Sides what woman would want me? All I do is make mistakes, ruin others' lifes and then just drown my sorrows in alcohol. Like would you want a big mess like me?" he scoffed and shook his head "I'm just one big damn flaw, that is for sure. So why the hell drag somebody else with me down in the pit where I belong?" he added and you swallowed the lump in your throat, biting your lip to keep the tears in.  
  
He couldn't really be thinking this way of himeslf right?  
  
You hadn't and you certainly didn't expect to see this side on this man. And what was for sure was that it hurt. It hurt like hell to see him like this.  
  
You never expected so much self-loathing from a man like him. His smile was the brightest you had ever seen and it surely was intoxicating. It was hard to believe that a man that could smile so brightly and lift your spirits so easily was so... broken on the inside.  
  
"Well... I would" you mumbled, looking down at your dress once again.  
  
"What?" you heard him breath out and you slowly and reluctantly turned your head so that you were looking at him.  
  
You felt a small blush form on your cheeks but you could not back down now, could you?  
  
"I said I would certainly want a man like you. You are not one big flaw, Dean. At least I don't think you are. Yes, you probably have your flaws but- we all do. Believe me, my dad has most of them and I have inherited them unfortunately." you let out a dry laugh and he did the same "But- I don't think that takes anything away from who you really are. Sure I can't say much because I don't know you all that well and... in all honesty I would love to know you better but-" you cleared your throat "-I guess that's not the point here. What I want to say is that I believe, no, I  _know_  that you're not what you believe you are, Dean."  
  
And you continued "Sure you make mistakes, we all do, and we all have our weak moments but that does not mean that we- that  _you_  do not deserve something good. You have the most kind heart I've seen on a person. You are selfless and caring and I- I know any woman would be lucky to have a man like you and they would certainly be damned if they let you go, Dean"  
  
You saw a smile forme on Dean's lips and you pursed yours, looking down at the floor instead of him because you knew that if you continued looking at those eyes and speaking then you would surely utter things that he was not supposed to know... Not yet at least.  
  
"And I know that any man would be damn lucky to have a woman like you" he muttered and your head snapped in his direction as you felt the blush darken at hearing his words.  
  
The look in his eyes made your heart flutter.  
  
You would have asked him what he meant by that but before you could even utter a word you reached the main dining room and the two soldiers that stood by the door opened it for you to walk in.  
  
"Ah there she is!" your father exclaimed with a big smile as soon as you walked close to them.  
  
There was a big table in the middle of the huge room, all sorts of food on it and the servants kept bringing more and more. Pouring wine for the guests that had already taken a seat and others motioning for the ones that were still coming to sit on their rightful place. Soft music was playing and you spotted from the corner of your eye the musicians on the far corner of the room. The curtains were pulled back allowing the light of the moon to shine through the big windows that covered and entire wall, the warm light from the candles mixing with that of the moon and managing to make a pleasant environment for everyone.  
  
"Come, come" he said motioning for you to come sit next to your mother than was sitting right next to him.  
  
Although you didn't want to you let go of Dean's arm and after a final look at him you turned your head and made your way next to your mother. She was looking at you with a small frown but you just shook your head and gave her a reassuring smile. You took a seat next to her but couldn't help but slyly look at Dean walk around the table. You knew he was going to stay, just like most of your father's soldiers and faithful knights had joined you tonight, but what you were hoping was for him to sit close to you.  
  
You got part of your wish come true as you saw him walk straight next to your father and take a seat there. His eyes were locked with yours all the time and you didn't dare break eye contact.  
  
Something that you did all night.  
  
It was pleasant even though you did not expect it. You thought you were going to just be bored throughout the whole meal - something that you always thought you would do and rarely joined such events - but the case was not like that at all. Dean made everything all the more interesting. You caught yourself laughing more times than you could count and enjoying yourself like never before. He would not stop telling everybody stories. Rarely it would be about only him. Most times it would be about things that had happened either on the castle or even during a battle. How that could be funny you didn't know but it surely was. Dean made it sound like that.  
  
He spoke about his adventures with some of the knights that were on the table and he obviously was good friends with. He talked about things that happened to them and even reminded to your father about incidents between the two of them while Dean was still new here and young. About how your father had taken a liking to him and treated him like a son... and about how Dean once almost set his beard on fire. That surely was something you, your mother, Dean, everybody else and above all  _your father_  were never going to forget.  
  
All the while you laughed, shared funny stories, and not, you caught yourself sneaking glances at Dean. Most of the time it was when he was not looking at you but was laughing. You absolutely loved to see him laugh. Even when he talked with your father or somebody else you could not take your eyes off him. Sneaking glances at him when he was looking at your direction was something you surely liked. There were times though that he would catch your eyes and even though you would blush you found yourself unable to look away from him. And then there were moments when you would catch him staring. Those you enjoyed the most. When you would just smirk at him and raise an eyebrow and he would quickly avert his eyes, pretending to be occupied with something else. Although the blush that creeped up his neck told you differently.  
  
And of course the conversation soon drifted to you. What with your upcoming birthday, what with your father being absent for so long and not having caught up with what was going on yet, what with so many men on the table (talking about the royals of course - not that your father would even so think about you and one of his knights) he had to ask...  
  
"So come on (Y/n). Your mother has not told me much because she obviously does not know much. But you've been known to keep secrets ever since you were little. However, you're a grown woman now. And there surely has to be a man in your life. Am I right?" he raised an eyebrow and all attention was on you now.  
  
Everybody was interested to know if the kingdom's only princess had found a man.  
  
You looked around you for a second, mouth slightly open ready to speak, until your eyes landed Dean. You looked at him for a while, the soft smile that played on his lips and his green orbs looking at you with an expecting look. The words that he had told you while it was just the two of you ringing in your ears.  
  
You closed your mouth but a smile soon formed on your face "Well, there might be someone" you said in a soft voice, eyes not leaving Dean.  
  
A smile that mirrored yours formed on his lips, as if he had caught to what you were saying and without breaking eye contact he, along with everybody else, raised his golden cup and said  _'To the princess!'_. Although he just seemed to be mouthing the words as everybody else said it cheerfully.  
  
Well, you now could say for sure that this was one of the best nights of your life...  
  
...and you couldn't wait for tomorrow to be the best  _day_  of your life because, as your father had previously told you, Dean was going to be the one to accompany you to your weekly stroll to the woods.


	4. Chapter 4

You let out a soft sigh as you sat down on your bed. You took your book in your hands but only fidgeted with its pages instead of reading some. You had woken up extra early today and as usual Anna and the rest of the maids had come to help you get dressed. It surely was something you could do on your own, especially in this case that no corset was involved, but they insisted nonetheless. They had gotten you ready quickly, mostly since they did not have to do much other than help you put on a quite simple and yet elegant dress and style your hair.  
  
Now you were just sitting on your own in your room playing with the book in your hands with plenty of time to kill till... Dean would come for you.  
  
You bit your lip at the thought of it and the fact that you were going to spend the entire day with him. You would occasionally go on stroll in the woods with your father, riding your horses and chatting while enjoying the warmth of the sun. As your father had told you yesterday night, though, he would not be able to come with you because he had some sort of business. He had told you, though, that Dean would be by your side the entire day. It seemed as if he was the only one that your father thought would be enough qualified to not only protect you properly in case something happened but also keep you good company. Sure you would have a few other soldiers, just like every time, there with you to make sure you were alright but luckily for you your dad did not think that was enough.  
  
"If I am not there, then the only person that I trust to take good care of you is Dean" he had said and you clearly remember being unable to hide the smile from your face.  
  
The thought of getting to spend an entire day just with Dean excited you to no end. You loved being close to him, that you had realized from the very beginning. You loved being able to see his forest-green eyes, to gaze into them and try to study Dean. You certainly wanted to know him better. You loved being able to see the freckles that dusted over his nose and cheeks. Every time you were close you tried to count them but as expected you failed. You loved taking in every little detail of his, whether it would be his soft-looking spiky hair, his strong jaw or his full lips that, you would confess to that, you had caught yourself thinking more than plenty of time how they would taste.  
  
Thoughts like that kept running through your mind and thoughts like that had been running through your mind all night, leaving little to no room for sleep. You had barely managed to sleep that was very much true but you found yourself not to really caring. You were so excited for getting to spend time with Dean today that you could not think about anything else, sleep included. You had fallen asleep at some point, yes, but had you also woken up pretty early. Your excitement was taking the best of you and you had to remind yourself a good few times that there was not much to expect from this. Like what could come from it? Him to suddenly confess that he was in love with you?  
  
You scoffed at the thought. No way. You had just known each other - well at least you him - for a day and you suddenly expected him to say it? No you didn't. Why would he even say it when you - that there was no doubt you felt something about him - could not even admit to yourself that you were in love with that man. It was not something that you had experienced before, though, so you could not really know.  
  
But other than being in his presence, having a talk with him was what made you even more excited. The small talk you've had the night before had given you the chance to to know him a little bit more. It gave an insight on his personality and you would be lying if you said you didn't like him even more after that. Just like you would be lying if you said it didn't hurt to hear him talk about himself the way he just had. Hearing him say how he believed he did not deserve something good hurt you and it certainly was something you wanted to change.  
  
A knock on the door made your head snap to its direction and your breath hitch on your throat. A smile spread on your lips as you could barely hold yourself from running to open the door.  
  
"Hey" you breathed out as soon you opened the door.  
  
"Hey. 'Morning" he said with a smile.  
  
"So are you... ready to go or do you need some more time?" he asked and you shook your head.  
  
"No, no I'm good. We can go" you said with a smile of your own, and closing the door behind you you followed him as he lead you to the back of the castle where they kept the animals and therefore the horses.  
  
"So how was your morning so far?" you asked in hoped of starting a conversation with him again.  
  
You saw a smile form on his lips and he soon burst into laughter.  
  
"What?" you asked immediately.  
  
"Nothing it's just- really?" he raised an eyebrow and you crossed your arms over your chest.  
  
"Yes, really. I don't understand what you find funny in this. I was simply asking you a question" you said, trying to fake hurt but the smile on your face said otherwise. Mostly because you were happy to have gotten him to be more open towards you and not formal all the time, calling you constantly princess like last night.  
  
"Alright then" he said the smile still on his lips, putting his hands behind his back "It was quite good. What about you, princess" he faked an accent.  
  
You playfully groaned "Good till now. Why do you keep calling me princess, though?" you looked at him a little bit seriously and a little bit sad because you had yet to hear him say your name "I mean yes I am one but that doesn't really matter to me. Can't you just call me (Y/n)?" you asked softly and he let out a sigh.  
  
"I'm sorry princess but I don't have that right. You are above me. You are the king's daughter and I just a knight in your castle." he said apologetically.  
  
"But... can't you just call me by my name when it's only you and me?" you asked, voice soft and low like a whisper.  
  
Dean bit his lip in thought and you could see his inner battle. Before he could answer, though, you had already reached your destination.  
  
"Princess!" one of the soldiers that had joined you many times before and would join you now came closer to you holding something that looked like a greenish-blue cape.  
  
"It is a really sunny day, your mother insisted that you take this." he said and you gave him a small nod, walking a little bit forward so that he could put it over your shoulders.  
  
But before he could even so touch you Dean stopped him, a small glare evident on his face "No, I'll do it. You go make sure our princess' horse is ready" he said taking the cape.  
  
The soldier was hesitant in the beginning, looking at Dean with a frown but did as he was told nonetheless. Dean was higher in hierarchy after all, so he could not do otherwise but followed his orders.  
  
Dean muttered something under his breath but clearing his throat he turned to you coming behind you he drapped the cape over your bear shoulders. His hands came into contact with them and made you slightly jump at the shot of electricity that run through you.  
  
"You alright?" he asked worried and swallowing you gave him a small nod.  
  
His hands made their way in front of you - even though he was still behind you - to tie the straps of your cape. You slightly turned your head to look at him and felt your breath hitch on your throat when you saw his face over your shoulder and so close to yours. He turned his head and your faces were now just a few inches apart as he gazed down at you and you found yourself unable to take your eyes off his. His warm breath that was fanning over your cheek was now mixed with yours and everything seemed to get hazy.  
  
"There" his rough voice said, breaking you out of your daze; after having tied the straps of the cape so it wouldn't fall off.  
  
"Thank you, Dean" you whispered and he smiled just slightly.  
  
"No problem... (Y/n)" he said and you took in a sharp breath, a smile forming on your lips at his words.  
  
Oh boy, did you love how your name rolled off his tongue and how sweet it sounded even when he said it with that husky voice of his.  
  
"Now..." he came in front of you and put the hoodie of the cape over your head, fixing some of your hair out of your face or behind your ear "Come on. We must get going" he finished, brushing his thumb just lightly over your cheek and you gave him a final and small nod.  
  
~~~  
  
You would be lying if you said that you didn't enjoy this stroll in the woods more than any other before. Sure your father was not with you today but what made it better than any other time before it was the fact that Dean was with you.  
  
Just like when it was you and your father, the four soldiers that accompanied you were on their horses but a good few feet away from you that were on the front. They were far enough so that they would not be able to hear what you were talking about but far  _enough_  just to be able to see that you were alright and that you didn't need anything.  
  
You and Dean were on your horses on the front talking about anything and everything that came to your mind. You loved even more the fact that you got to hear some more of his stories, adventures that he's been through. This time with his brother Sam. You were having an amazing time with him as you enjoyed the warmth of the sun and the slight breeze that blew through the rustling leafs of the trees. The sound of the birds singing gave to it a more fairy-tale-like environment.  
  
But you actually caught yourself more interested in Dean than anything else around you. You talked more and you were glad you finally got the chance to get to know him better. He was just like you had thought he would be. The first impressions you had from him and your small talk the previous night proved to the fact that he truly a man that cared for his loved ones deeply and would do anything for them. He had a big heart, he was caring and damn was he funny! Your stomach still hurt from the previous feat of laughter he had thrown you in with one more of his lame - but rather funny to you - jokes. He was a little bit cocky as well, you had to point that one out, but you were glad that he was being his true self in front of you instead of just pretending to be someone he wasn't just so that you would like him.  
  
And the best thing of all was that he no longer used that title you had come to hate over the years. Princess. You loved how your name rolled off his lips. It made pleasant shivers run down your spine and a smile always appear on your lips. Even though he would not say it often, every time felt like a true melody. At some point you actually caught yourself wondering how it would be to hear him sing.  
  
"Oh my gosh. You- you have to be kidding me now, right?!" you exclaimed, putting a hand in front of your mouth.  
  
"Nope. Did happen" he said pursing his lips.  
  
You snickered a few times before you burst into a full feat of laughter.  
  
You were now off your horses and you and Dean had decided to take a small walk through the forest while the horses rested next to the small lake that was nearby. The soldiers had stayed back as well, after Dean's orders. And you couldn't be more glad at that. To finally have gotten some  _alone_  (completely) time with Dean.  
  
"Oh come on" Dean whined "You promised you wouldn't laugh"  
  
"I-I k-know I-I just- oh my gosh." you couldn't say much in between laughing "I-I know I promised but oh- oh my. Dean! You- you pulled your pants down and shouted what? Pudding?"  
  
"Hey I was five, ok?" he grumbled but you just laughed more.  
  
"That does not justify you. Or wait. Were you really five or maybe you're lying so that I won't tease you more?" you said after your laughter died off a little bit.  
  
"Oh please yes I was five" he said with a playful roll of his eyes.  
  
"Ok, I guess it is to be expected from you. You almost set my father's beard on fire! No wonder he's become a maniac with shaving ever since" you said with a giggle.  
  
"That was an accident ok? I didn't plan on setting it on fire nor did I plan on hitting him while skiing with one of the knights' shields"  
  
"You what? You hit him? How? Where? When?" you asked intrigued.  
  
"Well, it was winter and really long time ago and as per usual I was watching the knights train but after a while I got bored. There was a lot of snow so I decided to have fun. I just was not expecting your father to show up so suddenly so instead of landing on the snow with the shield I... landed on top of him" he said with a small shake of his head.  
  
"Oh you Winchester are unbelievable! Now I know why I every time I asked him to play snowball fight with me he refuses to."  
  
"Yeah uh" he laughed nervously "I don't think it would be because of that. I once – when I was much younger - was playing snowball fight with one of my friends in the castle and you know I kinda like winning so uhm instead of making a small snowball I uh maybe made a quite bidder one and decided to throw it on the head of my friend... but your father just walked in and yeah... I guess I couldn't stop gravity"  
  
"Oh. My. God." you breathed out and started laughing hysterically.  
  
Dean soon joined you and you both could not stop.  
  
"Yeah. And I better not start about what I did with his crown. Actually, it is kinda hard to believe how after all of the things I've put him through he chose me to be his right hand." Dean said with a chuckle and a shake of his head.  
  
"Well, he obviously took a liking on you. And... it's not really hard if you ask me" you said with a small shrug, looking at him. His head immediately snapped to your direction.  
  
"You think?"  
  
"Yeah, he obviously trusts you a lot" you shrugged.  
  
"No, no I don't mean that" he shook his head "I mean, you think it is not hard to take a liking on me? Like... have you- have you taken a liking on me?"  
  
"As I said... it's not really hard to" you said, voice barely above a whisper.  
  
A big grin appeared on his face, like that of a child on Christmas day, as he took a few steps closer to you. Little to no space separating you anymore. As you looked up at him and biting your lip to keep your smile from getting bigger.  
  
"Glad to know that" he murmured.  
  
"And... can I ask you about me?" you whispered.  
  
"I can say that it is not hard to take a liking on you either" he said and you both chuckled lightly.  
  
You looked down, tucking a few strands of hair behind your ear. In vain through as they fell back in front of your face.  
  
"Here. Let me" he mumbled and brushing the strands out of your face he tucked them behind your ear, this time they stayed in place.  
  
Just like his hand, though. Slightly cupping your face.  
  
Almost silence had surrounded you and you actually found yourself enjoying it while you gazed back at Dean. The distance you had became even less as he seemed to lean in. But once again you did not care.  
  
The silence, though, as well as moment was ruined when the horses making a rather disturbed noise were heard. The fact they would not stop was that made Dean pull away.  
  
He groaned, as if he didn't want this moment to be ruined and you actually felt happy for that "Sorry. I better go see what's going on. I'll be back soon ok?" he asked and you nodded.  
  
He gave you a final smile and brushing a hand over your shoulder - creating goosebumps in the meantime let's not forget - and he quickly left towards the direction you had come from.  
  
You turned to watch him as he disappeared through the trees and bit your lip. You heart was hammering in your chest...  
  
...but it soon stopped beating as your blood run cold.  
  
A hand covered your mouth and a dagger was placed over your throat.  
  
 _Oh no_


	5. Chapter 5

A hand covered your mouth and a dagger was placed over your throat.  
  
Your eyes widened and your breath hitched on your throat. Maybe you should have followed Dean after all and not staid here all by your own.  
  
It was common to hear about thieves attacking passers by in the woods. Most times the victim ended up dead and that was actually a thought that scared you to no end.  
  
"Don't say a word. Or else I won't hesitate to cut this beautiful throat of yours open" the man's voice whispered to your ear and you had to keep yourself from scrunching up your nose at the terrible smell that came from him to you. Obviously he'd been drinking. A lot.  
  
When he saw you give him a small nod he slowly removed his hand from your mouth, but kept the dagger there "Good" he slurred and you whimpered slightly when he pressed he knife closer to your neck.  
  
"I'm just going to take your money and if you are a good girl we could have some fun as well" he said laughing.  
  
"I-I don't have any money. P-Please just let me go" you said with a small whimper.  
  
He let out what could only be described as an irritated growl and grabbing you by your shoulders he turned you and slammed you into a tree, your back aching from the collision. He kept the knife on your neck and eyed you up and down.  
  
"Well, look at that. Princess (Y/f/n) (Y/l/n). Well, isn't this my lucky day" he smirked at you and you bit your lip to keep the tears in. This could mean no good for sure.  
  
"Pl-please just let me go. I-I won't say anything. I promise. J-Just let me go. I don't have any money with me" you said in a shaky voice, tears welling up in your eyes.  
  
"Now why would I need any money. You, my dear princess and your innocence-" he started saying, dragging his knife over your neck and jawline without cutting "-Are much more worth it." he smirked evilly and your eyes widened.  
  
"No!" you all-but-shouted, the tears that had welled up in your eyes started to run.  
  
"Come on sweetheart, I won't bite. Hard" he laughed on his own, gripping at your waist painfully tight and making you scream in pain.  
  
"No, no!" you tried to fight him off but in vain.  
  
You shut your eyes tightly as you tried to fight him back, pushing him with all your strength and as if by a miracle you felt the weight lift off of you.  
  
Your eyes snapped open when you realized what was going on.  
  
"Take your hands off her!" Dean roared, attacking the thief.  
  
He grabbed him by the hem of his shirt and immediately collided his fist with his face in a rather painful - as it seemed - punch. And then another. And another. And another. Whether it be a punch to the face or Dean hitting him with his knee on the stomach, the thief was certainly being violently beaten up. Dean grabbed him by the hem of his shirt again and slammed him to the truck of a tree, giving him another violent punch.  
  
The thief fell limp on the ground but Dean kept beating him nonetheless. With each punch uttering a few words "Don't you dare touch my princess ever again." his words filled with venom as he hissed some of them.  
  
"Dean" you said softly "Dean, no it's ok. It's ok now. It's over. Stop." you said trying to calm him down, running to his side and taking hold of his bleeding hands to stop him.  
  
He was fuming, literally, as he looked down at the unconscious man anger boiling in him. When he turned his head to look at you, though, his gaze immediately softened.  
  
"It's ok" you whispered, forcing a small smile on your face.  
  
"Oh (Y/n)" he breathed out in a quick move he had you wrapped in his arms.  
  
You hesitated for a while but hugged him back, wrapping your own arms around him. You let out a shaky breath but felt a smile form on your lips when you felt his grip tighten on you. You buried your face even deeper in his chest and breathed in his soothing scent. His arms were wrapped securely around you while his one hand rubbed your head comfortingly. A sense of comfort and safety washed over you and you couldn't help but smile more at that.  
  
"I'm sorry" he mumbled and you pulled just slightly back to look at him.  
  
"What?" you asked with a frown.  
  
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't here with you to protect you in the first place. I'm sorry I didn't come earlier. I'm sorry I left you. Damn it. I shouldn't have left you for even a second to begin with." he groaned the last part but you shook your head at his words.  
  
"No, no Dean. Don't. Don't blame yourself. It is not your fault" you tried to reason with him.  
  
"Like hell it is. Damn it, it's my job to protect you and I just fucking left you all alone here" he grumbled, angry with himself.  
  
"It is your job and you did well on that. Dean, please. I am fine. Thanks to you" you whispered and buried your face once again in his chest.  
  
With a small sigh he wrapped his arms around you more tightly and kissed the top of your head. You stayed for a good while like that but when he heard a sob come from you he immediately pulled away to look down at you.  
  
"Sorry. It's- it's just that I'm still a little bit shaken" you said with a forced laugh and he only frowned more.  
  
"It's ok. It's ok." he murmured, wiping away the tears on your cheeks "I'm here. I won't leave you again. Ever again."  
  
"I know" you whispered, resting your forehead against his.  
  
He didn't say anything more, just like you didn't. You just gazed back at each other in silence, Dean cupping your face and rubbing his thumb over your cheek. Your eyes were roaming his face and before you could realize it you found yourself gazing at his lips, subconsciously licking your own. When you realized you had been staring at them for a good while you immediately averted them to look up in his eyes only to catch him staring at yours and biting his own. Once he caught your eyes, his widened slightly but he did not say anything.  
  
He only stood frozen in his place as he saw you lean in. Your breath mixing with his, your face slightly red, surely burning hot as you inched yourself more and more close to him. The distance between you was significantly becoming less, and your lips were just inches apart. You were hesitant but when you saw Dean was not about to pull away from you all hesitation left you. On the contrary he seemed to be leaning in as well, fact that made a small smile itch on your lips. You leaned in closer to him, wanting even more to press your lips to his, to taste him, to-  
  
"My princess!" a voice exclaimed from behind you and both you and Dean jumped, putting some significant distance between you.  
  
"What- what happened?!" one of the soldiers asked frantically, as they all ran towards you and Dean. Obviously they had heard all the noise from before.  
  
"A thief. He threatened the princess" Dean grumbled, offering you a hand as he got up "Take him. We will get him to the castle where the king will decide of his punishment" he said firmly.  
  
"Be quick. The princess and I are going to be waiting for you by the lake" he added, and while still holding your hand he made his way with you towards the lake.  
  
Some time completely alone for the two of you was much needed right now. But you obviously were not going to get that.  
  
"Wait! I am coming with you in case something happens again" one of the soldiers quickly came by your side.  
  
You let out a small giggle at the visibly irritated look on Dean's face. He mumbled something under his breath and turned to look at you when you squeezed his hand. He looked at you with a small frown but his eyebrows raised when he saw you wink at him.  
  
~~~  
  
As much as you wanted it you didn't get the opportunity to spend lots of time alone with Dean. Neither that day nor the next couple days. Sure you got the chance to see hm often, every day for that matter and you could not be more happy about that. You were also glad that you got the chance to talk to him for a little while alone.  
  
Just like when you had went on the stroll into the woods you had gotten to know Dean more. Even if the talks were quick and did not last long you always found yourself laughing more than any other time. You loved hearing to his lame jokes which quite frankly you thought were funny but above all you loved hearing to his stories. Adventures he's been in ever since he was young. The pranks he played on his brother (and vice versa) along with the pranks he would play on others here in the castle. Most of the time your father being the victim of Dean's doings.  
  
What you loved more about your talks was how open he was with you and how he trusted you with everything. Telling you things that you were sure he had not dared to say to anybody else. Those talks were the ones that you loved the most. Because those talks were the ones that gave you a true idea of who Dean Winchester actually was. Most times he would be like 'no chick-flick moments' which quite frankly you had a hard time grasping but you could see how all of that was simply a facade for him to hide how he actually felt. How he missed his parents, his brother most of all, how he wanted to visit them so much but his position here required his presence all the time.  
  
There were moments when you could clearly see how broken he looked on the inside. He had seen so much death from a young age and you could see that he blamed himself for his friends' death whenever he talked about how they had died on a war. You could see how he was beating himself up for not having managed to save them and every time you tried to reassure him that it was not his fault.  
  
You had to admit that you hated the fact that whenever you were alone with Dean and the conversation drifted to the two of you someone had to interrupt. Whether it was some other knight asking to talk with Dean, your mother wanting to talk with you about the preparations for your birthday ball or Anna along with your maids telling you that it was time for you to do something.  
  
No matter how many times you had come to the point of being just inches apart from each other someone seemed to be there to ruin the moment. And honestly it was becoming frustrating. Dean seemed to be bothered as well but it looked as if he thought that that was for the best anyway, which you couldn't really understand. Sure he was a good few years older than you, probably in his early thirties - you hadn't really asked him openly, but that was not what really mattered to you. Your father was actually ten years older than your mother but none of them cared and nobody else raised any objections. Not when both of them seemed so happy and in love with each other. It happened frequently after all with the royal families. Princesses could be married to older and even younger princes as long as they were from royal bloodlines.  
  
But you actually thought that his problem was that he was just a knight and you his princess. He had said it once after all.  
  
 _"I am merely your servant, my princess. It is... wrong" his words echoed in your mind even in the silence of your room._  
  
A knock on the door snapped you from your thoughts and straightening your back you spoke "Come in"  
  
You got up as the door opened and turned your back to them.  
  
"You asked for me, princess" Dean's rough voice was heard behind you as he closed the door.  
  
 _Damn formalities_  you thought exasperated.  
  
"I thought it was (Y/n), not princess" you looked at him over your shoulder.  
  
"My apologies" he said looking down at his feet. Fact that only made you more angry.  
  
Dean never said 'my apologies'. Never. He was not this formal with you. Not when it was just you and him anyway.  
  
You groaned "Will you just stop with that. It's (Y/n), Dean. Ok? Simple as that." you let out a sad sigh "Please"  
  
He looked at you for a good while before nodding "Sorry. You wanted me anything?" he asked with a small Dean-smirk.  
  
"Yes" you nodded with a smile of your own as soon as you saw him loosen up.  
  
You walked towards him and turned your back to him "Untie it" you said.  
  
"Wh-what?" he stuttered.  
  
You looked at him over you shoulder "Untie the strings. I want to change in something more comfortable" you said with a small smirk.  
  
"That's- that's what you called me for?" he asked, swallowing the lump in his throat.  
  
"No. I wanted to talk with you but I just don't feel really comfortable in this dress." you shrugged.  
  
"But-" he swallowed again "-What if someone comes in and-" you cut him off before he could say more.  
  
"Nobody will. I told Anna and the rest of the maids that I'm going to sleep early and they should not come in to help me with the dress or anything else. And my parents won't come either... We're alone" you ended up saying in a whisper.  
  
"O-ok" his voice sounded rough and husky.  
  
Silence surrounded you as Dean moved your hair out of the way and over your shoulder so that he had better view on the strings of the dress (you had no corset on). He slowly started untying, the dress becoming all the more loose around your form. He pulled the straps away and soon the dress was loose enough for you to take off. In fact it would have fallen if it wasn't for you holding it.  
  
No sound could be heard as Dean pulled away the final strings. No sound other than his breathing that had suddenly become really slow and heavy. You looked over your shoulder to see Dean looking down at you and your bare back, a hand tentatively extended as if he wanted to touch you, as he breathed heavily. His mouth was half open as his eyes roamed your back, a look of awe in his face as if he was looking at something he had never seen before.  _He surely was captivated by the sight in front of him._  
  
You bit your lip and turned your head away from him, closing your eyes as a smiled formed on your lips. Dean's hand finally coming in contact with your bare back sent pleasant shivers down your spine and you could barely help yourself from letting out a small moan. You just put up with a deep breath.  
  
And you could barely keep yourself from taking in a shaky sigh as he ran his hand down your back, his fingers brushing over your spine making goosebumps spread all over your skin. You bit your lips as his rough hand traveled all over the skin of your back making you wonder how it would be to feel them elsewhere.  
  
Just like Dean could not stop but think how it would be to see and touch more of you. How it would be to-  
  
"The white one" you mumbled and Dean seemed to snap from his daze and his trail of thoughts that was about to get a turn for a whole different direction than appropriate.  
  
"The white one there" you motioned to a white dress hanging there along with many others at the open wardrobe.  
  
"Y-yeah. Sure" his voice was more rough than before and you had to bite your lip to keep the smirk off your face.  
  
He seemed to be taking some extra time, searching for your dress although it was pretty obvious which one you wanted. There was just one white dress among the others. But as it seemed Dean was taking his time for another reason. His heavy breathing proved to the fact that he was trying to calm himself down and that he was trying to control himself more as (as you imagined) all sorts of thoughts ran at the moment through his mind. He ran a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated but not because he could not find the dress you wanted.  
  
That was for sure.  
  
Biting your lip and smirking you made your way towards him "This one" your voice was low as you said that, reaching for the dress he supposedly couldn't find.  
  
"Yeah I uh-" he abruptly stopped himself when he turned his head to look at you, his eyes only widening.  
  
You had dropped your previous dress a while ago and now stood half-naked next to him. But Dean averted his eyes quickly from your figure, a blush creeping up his neck. A deep on at that.  
  
"Princess you're..." he started but trailed off.  
  
He swallowed hard, trying his hardest not to stare. For too long at least.  
  
"Yeah. What, haven't you seen a naked woman before?" you raised a playful eyebrow at him  
  
You tried to be confident but at the same time could not help a blush that rose in your cheeks, anyway. You subtly tried to cover yourself a little bit, still trying to provoke him though. You saw that no matter how hard he was trying he couldn't help himself but look at you from head to toes, licking his lip subconsciously as he took every little detail in.  
  
"Y-yes. B-But you're the princess a-and it's- it's not right. I-I'm not- I mean I'm just a knight a-and-" he started stuttering and you had to keep yourself from giggling.  
  
First him blushing and now stuttering. This was priceless.  
  
"Well, I certainly don't mind" you shrugged and smirked at him.  
  
"What,  _do you_?" you raised a playful eyebrow at him and you saw his eyes slightly widen. He swallowed hard, opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water.  
  
You giggled slightly and bit your lip, winking at him.  
  
You threw the dress over your head and wore it "Some help?" you asked again turning your bare back to him so that he could button it up for you.  
  
"Yeah" his voice was lower than before and definitely huskier. He started buttoning up the back of your dress, this time his hands coming in contact with your back more than plenty of times. Brushing over your skin as he button up the dress, sending occasional jolts of electricity through your body. He soon finished his job and you turned to look at him  
  
"Thank you Dean. I don't know what I'd do without you. You've done so much for me that I cannot even begin with. I don't know... What can I do for you?" you tried to say as innocently and yet seductively you could. You cupped Dean's cheek and looked up at him with adoring eyes. Something that was not really hard when it came to this man (considering the feelings you had developed for him over the course of time).  
  
He swallowed hard as you pressed yourself closer to him "N-Nothing princess- I mean (Y/n). I-" he started stuttering but you cut him off.  
  
"A reward maybe. Yes, yes a reward. You deserve it." your voice was low, barely above a whisper and 100% seductive.  
  
"Princess please. Don't." his voice was extremely low and you could see the inner battle in his eyes. He wanted this but was afraid of the consequences.  
  
So were you... but you didn't care anymore.  
  
"Oh but I have to Dean. To thank you. For everything" you whispered and without any more words you leaned forward, bringing him closer as well, and closed the remaining distance between you. Pressing your lips to his.


	6. Chapter 6

"Princess, no" Dean breathed out, pushing your away. Your lips had barely touched and the kiss had not lasted for even a few seconds.  
  
"What?" you breathed out, hurt filling your voice "But I-I thought you... I thought you wanted this" you asked with a deep frown, recoiling from him.  
  
You felt your heart shutter and even though you tried to hide the disappointment and pain you felt, you couldn't. You thought that Dean wanted this as well. That he felt something, anything, for you. Just like you did. That's why you had decided to make the first move. You knew that with him being who he was and you being who you were he would find it really hard, even though he was the type of man to go for what he wanted.  
  
Here you were, though, losing all hope that something would happen between you and him.  
  
"What? Oh no, no (Y/n) . I-" he licked his lips and took a few steps towards you "I do" he let out a breath "I do. You have no idea how much, sweetheart" he said in a low voice, cupping your face.  
  
"Then why did you-" he didn't let you finish.  
  
"But that doesn't mean that we can, either. (Y/n) you-" he swallowed "-you are the king's daughter. A princess. You're meant to marry a prince and have a family with him while ruling the kingdom. You are meant to be with one of the royalties and not- not someone like me. I'm just a knight, (Y/n). A servant for you and your family. I'm not wo-" you cut him off before he could say more.  
  
"Dean Winchester. I swear to every god that any religion has ever had that if you so much as dare say that you are not worth it I am going to kick your ass so fucking hard that you won't be able to sit let alone walk properly!" you said with narrowed eyes pointing a finger at him.  
  
That actually made him shut up but you could see a small smirk playing on his lips at hearing you curse. He was actually proud to know that you had it in you.  
  
You let out a breath and let your hand fall to your side "Because you are Dean. You are worth much more than you think or than you could ever imagine. And I don't care Dean! I don't care that you are not a royalty! I don't give a flying fuck that you are not a prince because- to hell with it! I don't want one! I only want you! I-I have never felt this way in my life before. Never! And I... I don't want to let go of it, Dean" you ended up saying in a really low voice.  
  
Dean bit his lip as he looked at you "But it's wrong" he dared to say.  
  
"Then why does it feel right, huh?" your voice was low but still audible, somewhat rough, as well, from the tears that threatened to spill.  
  
"But... what will your people think? How do you think they will react to that? And then... what about your parents? You think your father will approve of his beautiful daughter being with a... filthy warrior like me?" his voice was filled with venom when he spoke about himself and you felt yourself fighting against the tears even harder when you heard him talk so low of himself.  
  
"I'm nothing but a servant to you. I don't deserve this, hell I don't even deserve of you to give me a second glance. I'm not prince. I can't offer you all of the things you need. Your parents would never accept me and your people will only disapprove. It is not right to-" he started speaking again but you just cutting him off.  
  
"I don't care!" you all-but-shouted. You were pretty glad that your room was on the far back of the castle, isolated from all the others that were occupied.  
  
"I don't fucking care anymore, Dean!" the tears that you've been holding run down your cheeks now "I'm tired! I'm tired of what's wrong and what's right! I'm tired of having to think of what I must and must not do! I'm tired of having to make everybody else happy but not myself! I'm tired of doing what they expect me to! I'm so tired Dean! All I want is once- just for once to let myself do what I think is right. What  _I_  think I must do and not  _them_. I had never been more happy in my life than when I am with you and now I just have to give that away because it is not right?! Well, I don't want to Dean! I don't want to!" you screamed at him, tears running your cheeks and sobs started to escape your throat.  
  
"I'm tired Dean" you murmured, looking down, voice hoarse "I'm tired of everything. All I want is to do is be with you because I-I have feelings for you. I have feelings for you Dean" you ended up whispering.  
  
"I've always done everything they wanted me to. I've always been a good daughter and princess. I've always behaved and took care of what I said or did because that's what they expected from me and now I- I can't even-" you started speaking again in between cringe and sobbing only to be cut off by Dean...  
  
...crashing his lips to yours.  
  
The kiss was not hesitant as before and it certainly lasted longer than the previous. It was somewhat sloppy but you did not care. All you cared about was Dean's lips on yours kissing you like there was no tomorrow. The passion he put in it made your heart flutter and you brought your hands around his neck, gripping at it and trying to bring him as close as possible, his hands on your waist doing the exact same.  
  
Your eyes remained closed for a while even when you pulled away. Dean rested his forehead against yours and cupped your face, brushing a few stray tears with his thumb away. You let out a shaky sigh and slowly opened your eyes to look up into his beautiful green ones.  
  
"No more tears ok?" he asked after a rather long pause.  
  
Your tears had stopped but there were just a few stray ones for Dean to wipe. You only gave him a small nod.  
  
"Sorry" you mumbled and he shook his head.  
  
"You don't have to be sorry, sweetheart" he smirked slightly when he saw your own smile at hearing his nickname for you "I was a jerk for saying all of the things I did. I know you well enough to know that that's not what you want. And I sure as hell was a jerk for trying to push you away when... I want to be with you so much" he said rubbing his thumb over your cheek.  
  
"I guess you are right. You are a jerk" you said with a small giggle and he chuckled.  
  
"Thought you would have figured that one out by now" he said with a smile and you gave him a small shrug.  
  
"I did. I just never thought you would be that big of a jerk to try and push me away when you feel the same way"  
  
He let out a small sigh "I know. I just thought it would be for the best but I was clearly... wrong. I don't think I would manage long without you anyway. Sorry, sweetheart" he mumbled.  
  
"It's ok. Besides-" your voice got a playful hint in it "I think I know of a way you can make up for it" you smirked at him and he looked at you with narrowed eyes.  
  
"What?" his voice was suspicious and yet playful.  
  
You looked at him for a while, biting your lip, before you brought your hand up and cupped his cheek. Dean closed for a moment his eyes and leaned into your touch "Stay here. The night. With me." you whispered and his eyes snapped open.  
  
"What? N-no, I can't. (Y/n) what- what if they catch us?" he sounded panicked.  
  
"They won't. Anna never enters my room without knocking in the mornings and- and we'll be careful when you get out of here. Please, Dean. Just one night" you held onto his hands and looked up at him with pleading eyes.  
  
He bit his lip as if he was about to say no but you could see how much he wanted to stay as well. He groaned slightly and you knew you had won "Fine" he grumbled although the smile on his face said that he was happy that he would get to stay.  
  
"Thank you, thank you so much" you wrapped yours arms around him in a quick hug.  
  
Dean laughed wholeheartedly and his smile only got bigger when as you pulled away you kissed his cheek "You're just lucky you're the princess and I have to follow your orders" he said and you rolled your eyes.  
  
"Yeah, as if you don't want to stay anyways" you said laughing slightly "Come now. Help me" you added.  
  
"With what?" he frowned as he saw you turn your back to him.  
  
"Taking off the dress" you said, not helping the smirk on your lips especially when you heard his -  _rather loud_  - groan.  
  
"Princess" he grumbled.  
  
"Oh hush it's an order. Just do as told and unbutton this thing. I'm going to change behind the changing screen, don't worry" you said and of course he did as told, muttering under his breath something that sounded like  _'You're going to be the death of me'_.  
  
"Then why did you tell me to help you change the previous one?" he sounded grumpy but you could hear a smirk in his voice.  
  
"Cause... I really don't know. Was the first thing that came to my mind. But I can't sleep in this either" you shrugged.  
  
"Of course. Because you love torturing me" he mumbled and you giggled.  
  
"Hey Dean" you asked after a while of silence and he gave you a hum in response "Why do you keep calling me 'princess' sometimes? We've gotten in a first name basis, even using pet names but you sometimes do call me with my title. Why?"  
  
"Oh but I don't use it as a title,  _princess_ " he said and you looked over your shoulder to see him smirk down at you.  
  
You laughed and shook your head "Of course" you muttered.  
  
You fell into a comfortable silence after that. Once Dean was done unbuttoning you made your way behind the changing screen slipping out of your dress you wore a short nightgown that failed to cover much.  
  
"Of course you'd choose that one" Dean said grumpily, rolling his eyes as soon as he saw you.  
  
You just shrugged innocently and made your way to your bed. Your bare footsteps on the floor the only thing that could be heard for a while.  
  
"Come" you said softly, patting the space next to you.  
  
He was quite reluctant to do so but came towards you nonetheless.  
  
You rolled your eyes slightly "I hope you don't expect me to let you sleep with all those things on, right?"  
  
"Uh... yes?" he shrugged slightly, raising a hopeful eyebrow.  
  
"Dean." you groaned slightly "Just take them off. Be comfortable" you told him and with a sigh he started taking most of the things he was wearing off.  
  
He threw them on a chair and turned towards you, slowly making his way to your bed and under the covers with you. He was reluctant in the beginning but soon loosened up and wrapping his arms around your waist he hugged you close to him. You rested your head on his chest and after a while of just gazing at him, you smiled and closed your eyes mumbling a goodnight to him just like he did to you.  
  
You were sure you fell asleep earlier than him. Maybe it was his soothing heartbeat or the feeling of him playing with your hair. Or maybe it was just being there with him that brought you a sense of comfort and peace that you had longed for for a lot of time that made you have one of the best sleeps of you life.  
  
~~~  
  
You were slowly pulled out of your sleep as some light that shone through the curtains fell on your face. You let out a soft groan and you tried to open your eyes. You blinked a few times before they adjusted to the light. You let out a content sigh as at your small movement Dean tightened his arms around you. You let a smile rest on your lips when your back pressed closer to his firm chest.  
  
 _It wasn't a dream after all_  you thought happily.  
  
You turned slowly so as not to wake Dean up. He let out a small groan of protest and tightened his grip on your but you let out a small sigh of relief when he did not open his eyes. You smiled softly as you looked up at him, just a few rays of sun shining over his face. Just enough to enlighten his beautiful features. The freckles that dusted over his nose and cheeks seemed like little stars shining. You honestly couldn't wait for him to open his eyes so that you would get to see what they would like in this light.  
  
You slowly brought one of your hands up and ran your fingers just subtly over his face. Your touch was like that of a feather and you loved the contact. You ran your fingers from his jaw to his cheeks and cheekbones to the side of his head and then up to his hair, entangling your fingers with his soft dark blond hair. Your smile got bigger at the softness of them. It was just like you had imagined so many times it would be.  
  
You brought your hand back to rest on his chest in fear of waking him up. Staying like this, just looking at him and trying to savor every little detail of his face was all you wanted to do at the moment. Especially at hearing the soothing sound of his steady heartbeat and soft breathing. He snored slightly, earning a giggle from you. Only when he seemed to stir did you stop.  
  
"You're staring" Dean's voice said, making your eyes widen slightly.  
  
You hadn't realized he was awake and for a moment you thought he was talking in his sleep. But the smirk on his lips said otherwise.  
  
"I'm gazing" you mumbled sleepily.  
  
"It's creepy" he countered.  
  
"It's romantic!" you tried to justify yourself.  
  
He only let out another sleepy groan and turned so that he was almost on top of you, your limbs were tangled from before. He buried his face in your neck and you giggled.  
  
"Dean!" you exclaimed through laughter as he peppered your neck with small butterfly kisses. His slight scurf tickling your neck.  
  
"Sshh" he said sleepily "Don't talk. Just five more minutes" he mumbled and hugged you even closely.  
  
You didn't say anything more and just enjoyed the feeling of his moving hands around you. It seemed as if it was something he was doing subconsciously but you enjoyed it greatly nonetheless. You let out a small gasp when his hand moved under your dress and came into contact with the skin of your butt.  
  
Dean's eyes snapped open as soon as he realized what he had done "Shit. Sorry. I'm sorry, (Y/n). I didn't mean to-" he started apologizing, eyes almost wide, but you cut him off.  
  
"No" you said softly "No it's ok. It's fine. You-" you took hold of his hand and placed it over your bare leg in between his "-are allowed to touch as much as you want" you whispered.  
  
A small smile appeared on Dean's lips as he gave you a small nod. He relaxed and pulled you closer to him like before, he rubbed his thumb over your thigh and made a small smile (and blush) appear on your face. Shivers run down your spine and goosebumps created all over your skin. You bit your lip when he gave your thigh a squeeze and nuzzled your face more on the crook of his neck. You couldn't help but press a small kiss there and smirked when you heard Dean in a sharp inhale.  
  
Silence had surrounded you and you felt completely at peace in Dean's arms. A small smirk played on your lips as you earned a small groan from him when you moved your leg.  
  
"Princess" his voice was husky.  
  
"Yes?" you asked innocently, pressing a few kisses on his neck.  
  
Dean opened his mouth to say something more but no words came from his mouth as the both of you froze in your place.  
  
"My lady it's time for you to wake up!" Anna's voice was heard crystal clear as she started pounding on the door.  
  
What scared you more was the doorknob twisting.  
  
Something that only meant she was about to enter.


	7. Chapter 7

Your eyes widened as you saw the doorknob twist. Your heart stopped beating and your blood ran cold. You looked at Dean that had turned his head to look at you at the same time, his eyes were wide as well.  
  
“My princess!” Anna’s voice snapped your head to the slowly-opening door’s direction.  
  
“No!” you exclaimed “Anna wait!” you said just as frantically and immediately got up from your bed to run to the door’s direction.  
  
Or well at least you tried to. What with your limbs being tangled with Dean’s, what with your whole body being tangled with the covers, what with them being a big mess and what with you being a big hurry you could have not helped but stumble in your process of getting out of bed. You almost fell face-first on the floor but managed to steady yourself and running as fast as you could towards the door, slamming with all your weight on top of it and pushing it closed. A loud thud echoed and you heard Anna groan slightly which meant that you had hit her slightly.  
  
“My- My princess, is everything alright?” she asked worried.  
  
“Yes. Yes! Just- just- Have I not told you not to enter until I tell you so?!” you said suddenly in authoritative voice.  
  
“I- My apologies princess. May I enter now?” she asked and swallowing you looked at Dean with wide eyes.  
  
“I- No.” you said and pursed your lips.  
  
“…Why?” she hesitated but asked and you cursed her in your mind for wanting to know everything.  
  
“Because I freaking want to cuddle” you said sarcastically, gritting your teeth slightly.  
  
You didn’t mean for her to hear, it certainly wasn’t the answer you would give her but she caught on it.  
  
“Cuddle with whom my princess?” she asked in a rather scandalized voice tone.  
  
Your eyes widened and your head snapped up from the floor you were looking at to stare at Dean who had a small smirk on his face. Maybe it was because of how you were right now or maybe - and most probably - because of what you had just said. Sure Anna was not going to get in, not unless you told her so - and you weren’t going to - so that meant you were safe. But trying to find a good enough excuse to make her leave was something that had you panicking slightly andDean- Well, Dean seemed to be rather enjoying it, especially you being so flustered over it. Which only got you more frustrated.  
  
“Uh with the… bed?” it came out as a question and immediately glared at Dean that snorted, putting a hand in front of his mouth to keep himself from laughing more.  
  
“The… bed?” Anna asked again and you rolled your eyes at her persistence.  
  
“Uh yes. Yes the bed” you tried to sound confident “It’s really warm and soft and- and it’s flirting with me. It doesn’t want me to get up yet and neither do I.”  
  
“My princess” she sounded perplexed and you didn’t blame her “Do you mean you want to sleep more?”  
  
You let out a small sigh of relief scolding yourself in the meantime for not saying it so simply straight away. Being panicked and really nervous didn’t help anyway.  
  
“No I freaking want to have sex with it” you grumbled, running a face down your face.  
  
You heard her let out a loud squeak - you didn’t speak like that and surely it was not expected from a princess to be so… blunt. You glared slightly at Dean who let a few chuckles slip.  
  
“Yes, Anna” you let out a sigh “I want to sleep a little bit more. Come by in about one or two hours”  
  
“As you wish my princess” she said in a mumbled and you listened to her footsteps as she walked farther away from your room.  
  
You let out a sigh and relaxed as soon as her footsteps could no longer be heard more. You both relaxed as it seemed because Dean finally allowed himself to laugh out loudly.  
  
You glared at him with crossed arms even as his laughter died out. He just chuckled as he got up from the bed and made his way towards you “So… you wanna ‘freaking have sex with it’ huh?” he asked with a wide smirk, wrapping his arms around you.  
  
You just glared at him, lips pursed and eyes narrowed at him. Moments of silence passed until smiles formed on both your faces and you both erupted into a feat of laughter.  
  
When the laughter died out he gazed down at you with a smile still on his face and you both soon leaned in and kissed. His rough lips moved in sink with your soft ones in a sweet and slow kiss. His hands gripped more tightly onto your waist as he tried to bring you as close as possible to him. There was no space between you anymore as your bodies were flushed and you could feel all of his muscles flex. Your arms sneaked their way around his neck as you felt Dean deepen the kiss. It soon became more intense, passionate and you could feel the hunger in it. He licked your lower lip and you opened your mouth slightly to give him access. Dean’s hot tongue entered your mouth and explored it, earning a small groan of pleasure from you. It moved in perfect sink with yours and this time you heard Dean let out a pleased moan. One of his hands moved to your lower back and all the way to your thigh and leg. He gripped tightly as he lifted it close to his waist.  
  
You pulled away only when the need for air was too much to take. Your eyes were closed in the beginning, mouth half open as you tried to suck in as much air as possible, lips kiss swollen, your cheeks were burning hot and you were sure they were bright red. You slowly opened them and looked up at him. He cupped your cheek and rubbed his thumb over it, his green eyes sparkling ever so slightly. You bit your lip as a smile spread on your lips.  
  
The feeling he was giving you right now was impossible to describe and you knew that this…  
  
…was the beginning of something amazing.  
  
~~~  
  
And that was the word you could only use to describe the week that followed. Amazing. Truly amazing.  
  
You felt yourself on cloud nine every freaking moment of your day because you got to spent every freaking moment (sort of) with him. Dean.  
  
You thought it would have been hard, and it actually kind of was, but how could it not be? Trying to hide from everyone how you felt about him, let alone that something was going on between you and him, was definitely something hard. And Dean was just not making it easy for you.  
  
It was hard enough as it was with you trying to hide it from everybody but with Dean trying to slip small secret notes to you was making it nearly impossible. It was just small one-sentence letters he wrote to you and would slip into your hands whenever you were standing really close to each other, supposedly hearing at your father talk about something important but actually only thinking about each other. You had almost a collection of those but it was a way of Dean telling you things he couldn’t because you were not alone. One that he had given you just yesterday still made you giggle, as you could just picture the look on his face when he wrote it.  
  
 _'Not again with that dress’_ it said, referring to the dress you were wearing and that just happenedto be the same one you had first asked him to help you take off.  
  
You had just given him a small and innocent shrug. Not missing the chance to whisper to him as you passed by “Maybe you could help me take it off later tonight?” and a small wink as you left him trying to suppress a chuckle and smile; biting his lip.  
  
But then there were just some small cute notes that he told you how beautiful you looked or how much he wanted to be with you at that moment. Each one of them was exchanged under secrecy, the both of you being really careful to not get caught.  
  
Your favorite ones were the ones that he would just set time and place of the day for you tomeet up because he would be free or he knew that your father would be busy at that moment. You always looked forward to those moments when you and him would meet up at a small forest near the castle, not many people visited it so the chances of you getting caught there, were not high. And you surely loved it whenever it was just you and him free to be with each other.  
  
You loved being able to wrap your arms around him, to have him hold you close to him. To be able to look him in the eyes, cup his face and tell him how much you loved this. This and not  _him_. You didn’t dare say that yet. But, yes, you loved being able to press your lips to his and kiss him with all you had. To be able to smell that natural scent of his that always made you smile. To be able to bury your face in his chest and at the same time listen to his steady heartbeat, memories of that first night being brought back. You tried doing that again sometime again, as well. After many pleads from you and Dean trying to decline he had given in and agreed to coming to your bed to sleep again there with you. And it was simply amazing. Just as amazing as it was - for Dean - you trying to hold Anna from entering the following morning.  
  
You loved those moments when you got to be held in his arms. Sure you felt bad for somewhat lying to your parents (and everybody else for that matter) and that you couldn’t actually openly be with Dean. But there was not much you could do about it. You would, at the right moment, but for the time being you just wanted to enjoy what you and him had.  
  
And you surely enjoyed it when he would sneak behind you, while you were walking down a hallway of the castle all alone, and startle you by spinning you around and pressing you to the wall. His lips every time finding their way either on yours or on your neck, kissing, licking, sucking and definitely biting as you tried to keep yourself from letting out a loud moan that would surely echo through the large hallway. His hand always managing to lift your dress as he helplessly tried to touch as much of you as possible. Your heart would hammer in your chest and your hands would shake slightly as you tried to keep up with the mess of passion and lust Dean was at such moments. Your heart had almost stopped beating when you had heard a couple maids, once, but Dean was quick to act. He had pulled you on a corner and pressing his body to yours he had shielded you from them, you remaining silent as they walked by.  
  
“That was close” you had said breathlessly once they were completely out of earshot and eyesight.  
  
“Yeah” he had only said, voice husky and incredibly low.  
  
You had just stared at each other for a few seconds before he had dived in to kiss you again and you not missing a beat to respond to his rather rough kiss.  
  
It was indeed close just like that one time you had went out for a stroll in the woods with your parents. More soldiers had accompanied you this time, considering what had happened last time, and of course Dean was one of them. Your father had seemed to just like him even more when he found out that he saved you and you were pretty glad about that because he had sort of become your personal knight. Kind of like a bodyguard. Which only meant that you got to spend lots of time together. Your father no longer trusted anybody else for your safety other than Dean because he knew just like you did that Dean would risk his life to save you at any given second.  
  
Anyway, you had managed to find a chance to be alone with Dean during that stroll and of course had jumped straight into each other’s arms. Hugging and him leaning down to give you a soft kiss after all these hours you were apart. You talked a little bit about the both of you and how you were (all the time not letting go of each other - and you teasing Dean who denied it that he was a softy at heart) but of course you had to abruptly pull away from each other when one of the soldiers had come in search of you.  
  
You were at least lucky to have managed to keep it a secret despite your mother’s teasing. It was true that you spent a lot of time with Dean, even when nobody was looking, whether it was just small talks while you visited him at the training area or just the two of you taking a small stroll in the garden. Nobody could hear you and you tried to keep almost stoic faces, making sure to put some distance between you and making sure that whenever someone was around to change the subject so that they would realize anything. But your mother teasing you about him always made you blush and you had to keep as calm as possible when denying everything.  
  
 _If only she knew_  you thought to yourself every time.  
  
Luckily she was pretty busy this day (well, you were as well anyway) with the preparations for the ball for your birthday. Though the glances you and Dean exchanged were hard for someone to just ignore or think they were innocent, you just tried your best to pretend that you were just friends. Even if your hands lingered a little bit more on each other or you seemed to care a little bit too much about each other’s well-beings. Especially Dean. Or well maybe you had to do something with it anyway. The suggestive faces you made at him, the teasing moves you made surely could not go unnoticed by a grown man like him.  
  
You were just glad that everybody else was too busy with your upcoming birthday to notice any of them.  
  
Speaking of which-  
  
“You asked to see me father?” you asked as you entered the room, your father sitting on his throne and you didn’t miss to spot Dean by his side.  
  
A small smile spread on your lips as your eyes locked and you looked at each other.  
  
“Uh (Y/n), yes” your father said, making your head snap to him. He averted his eyes from the papers in front of him and looked at you.  
  
“As you know in a couple days it’s your birthday and we’re going to have a ball as usual.” he said and you nodded “So I wanted to ask you, dear. Don’t you think it’s time for us to meet that luckyman that has stolen your heart and you were talking about when I first returned?” you saw a small smirk play on his lips.  
  
You bit your lip and looked down at your hands “Dad I don’t know. I-I’m not really sure if it’s the right time”  
  
“Did something happen between you and him? Did he… do something not proper?” he asked and you groaned slightly.  
  
“Dad. No, nothing happened and he did noting like that. Besides, even if something had happened I don’t think I would really be discussing this kind of issues with  _you_ ” you grumbled feeling a small blush rise to your cheeks.  
  
“Right” he gave a small awkward chuckle “You are right, dear. I just wanted to know if he became more than just an interest, you know.”  
  
You gave him a small nod and biting slightly your lip you glanced at Dean whose eyes never left you. You could see how much he wished, just like you did, that you could speak up right this moment. Because you did want it. You did want to tell your father that yes there was a man in your life that completed you, that made you feel amazing, that cared for you, that was sweet with you and at the same time rough and passionate when you wanted him. That there was a man in your life that you lo-  
  
“Because I really hope you know that if nothing happens with him in a few days then I am afraid I will have to take matters into my own hands and have chosen a husband for you by the day of the ball” he said and you felt your blood ran cold as you dared to look back at the look on Dean’s face.


	8. Chapter 8

“What-” you swallowed the lump in your throat “What do you mean, father?”  
  
“Just what I said, (Y/n)” he said letting out a sad sigh “You know I never forced you to do something you didn’t want to my dear but this- this is much more different and you know it (Y/n)” he said in a firm yet sympathetic voice.  
  
“Dad” you said in a trembling voice.  
  
“I am not talking to you as a father to daughter but as a king to princess. (Y/n) the day when you will have to take over the kingdom is soon approaching and we both know that you won’t beable to do so without a king by your side.”  
  
“Dad you’re not that old! Your father, grandpa, ruled for many years this kingdom before you took over! You were much older than me when you got married as well!” you tried to reason with him.  
  
“That was much more different and you know it, (Y/n). My father may have ruled for many years but he did so because he was able to. Whereas I, my dear, don’t think I will be able to do this formuch longer” he said with a sad smile and you pursed your lips.  
  
“Don’t say that, dad. Please.” you mumbled. Sure his health condition wasn’t one of the best but you always tried to stay optimistic that your father would have a long life ahead of him and that you would get to spend much more time with him.  
  
“I know that you feel sad about this dear but it is the truth” he said sadly.  
  
“Dad just stop talking like that!” you said gritting your teeth.  
  
“(Y/n)-” your father started, ready to scold you but luckily for you Dean spoke up.  
  
“My king-!” he took a small step forward “I know I don’t have the right to speak up much less when you and (Y/n)- I mean princess- When you and princess are conversing but- She is right my king. There is no need for you to be so pessimistic. I can’t imagine how it is for her to listen to you talk about your possible-” he swallowed “-death but I know how I feel my king and how everybody else will. The doctors said that your health is improving and if this is about you dying on war then I assure you there is no such chance when I along with all of your knights and soldiers would risk our lives for you. For this kingdom. Because you are the kingdom my king and… I do not believe it is right to put such pressure on the princess.” he said and looked at you that were staring just back at him.  
  
“Besides-” he spoke up again, eyes never leaving yours “I am sure that when the right time comes, princess will find the right one. I would surely trust her on that decision. And so should you… Any man would be lucky to have a woman like her, I don’t doubt she will have any trouble finding someone” he ended up saying in a low and soft voice and you bit your lip as a big smile formed on your face.  
  
“And I don’t doubt that in the least bit, either.” your father smiled at you “Any prince would be lucky to have her” he added and glancing at Dean you saw the smile fade from his lips as he looked down, his jaw clenched.  
  
“Prince” you repeated, face stoic and voice bitter; almost coming out as a hiss.  
  
“Yes, prince. What would you want? A knight?” he let out a laugh as if it was some kind of joke"No offense Dean" he quickly added, really meaning no offense to Dean but at the same time speaking the truth.  
  
“None taken my King” Dean said as formally as he could.  
  
“But-” he suddenly said turning to look at you “I am afraid this does not mean that I have suddenly changed my mind.”  
  
“(Y/n) I only wanted to ask you about that man you were talking about because I respect your decisions, dearest. I want you to have somebody by your side that you truly love but- if that has not happened by your birthday then I am sorry to tell you but I will have to choose on for you” he was dead serious now.  
  
He got up from his throne “I have never forced you to do something you do not want to (Y/n) but in this issue… I am not going to hesitate to take matters into my own hands. If you have not had someone by your 23rd birthday then I will chose a prince of my own for you… to marry. I know that I will probably rule for much longer, or at least I hope so but that does not change the situation. I have made my decision. You are to be married shortly after your birthday whether you want it or not.”  
  
“You’re really going to force me do that?!” you asked, eyes almost wide.  
  
“As much as I hate to say it… yes. I am sorry (Y/n) but you have to. It is your right. You are the princess of this kingdom. The only one. You are going to take after me in ruling this kingdom. You will be the one to make the choices for all those people outside. They depend on you (Y/n). They depend on you to take after me and make the right decisions to preserve the peace in this place. To make sure nothing will change for them. It’s hundreds of lives that depend on you (Y/n). You have to take over and you can’t do so unless you have someone by your side. You know I would never make you do something you do not want to but this- this is important (Y/n). You have to marry a prince and-” he started saying, his voice deep and stern full of authority; only for you to cut him off.  
  
“Why the hell do you keep repeating it?!” you exclaimed and sucking in a deep breath you spoke again “I’m sorry. I just- why do you keep insisting on it? Why a  _prince_?” it came out as a hiss.  
  
“Then what? What else could it be (Y/n)?” he asked letting out an exasperated sigh.  
  
“I don’t know.” you shrugged slightly and as you looked up at him your eyes locked with Dean’s that was standing right behind him. You looked at him for a good while before taking in a deep breath and straightening your back you turned to face your father dead in the eyes.  
  
“Anybody. Anything. Why would it matter if I’m in l-” you shook your head “If I’m in love with him, hm?”  
  
He let out a sigh “(Y/n) we’re not going to start this kind of conversation now. It actually is a matter we do not have to talk about even in the slightest. You are a princess. A royalty. You. Belong. With. A royalty. That is not something we are going to discuss right now. Or ever for that matter. I hate to do this to you (Y/n) but if you have not found a man- a  _prince_ of your own till next week then I am going to find one for you. End of discussion.” he said as firmly as he could and you clenched your fists by your side.  
  
“But-” you started but he cut you off.  
  
“No ‘but’s (Y/n). I said I’ve made my decision. I may be your father but I also am your king and you will follow my orders. You will do as I say and that’s final. Go to your room now.” he spoke with an angry tone and letting out a growl you stomped your foot. You took hold of your dress, slightly lifting it and making your way quickly out of your room.  
  
Your father let out a sad sigh and ran a hand down his face once you exited the door and shook his head “I shouldn’t have talk to her that way. Maybe I shouldn’t have said all of the things I did, either”  
  
“Was I too harsh, Dean?” he asked, looking at the younger man next to him.  
  
“No.” Dean swallowed and looked at him in the eyes “No, my King. You were right”  
  
~~~  
  
You let out a huff as you fell face-first on your bed.  
  
After your conversation with your father you couldn’t stay at your room even though you had tried it. You went to your mother desperately in need of some support which at some point you got. It would have been better if you hadn’t. You talked with her about your conversation with your father and all the things he told you. Your mother said almost what you had said to your father, how it was not right to force you to marry somebody you did not want to- hell, even not know and how you should marry someone you loved and wanted when you felt it was right. And you let yourself admit that your father was right up to a point. You needed to find somebody who would be the king of this place because sooner or later you were going to take over after your father and doing so on your own was not an easy job. He was right as far as that was concerned. All these people depended on you but that was no reason for your father to do what he was about to. And luckily your mother did acknowledge that fact.  
  
She did support you on it. She had clearly said that.  
  
“You’re right, (Y/n). You will get married whenever you want to and certainly with someone you love. I know that the sooner the better but forcing somebody on you is not the solution. You will find a prince of your own, dear. I am sure”  
  
And you could not help but scrunch your nose at that.  
  
 _Prince._  
  
Why the hell did it have to be a prince?! Why a royalty? Why should you marry someone that you did not love or barely knew (if not at all) just because they happened to belong to a royal bloodline while the man you loved just so happened to not be a prince?  
  
 _Love._  
  
The thought of that word made your heart beat in fear but at the same time flutter, because you knew that it was true  
  
You really did not know why everybody just kept pointing it out all the time. A prince. You have to marry a prince. You must marry a prince. You thought of asking them sassily what would happen if he was a king? Many princes had taken over after their fathers’ sudden death, even if they were young at age. But one thing was for sure. He had to be a royalty. Everybody would say that when they talked about you finding a man. What the hell had gotten over everybody you could not understand.  
  
You had thought that a walk in the garden would have helped you clean your mind but even when you did so the situation did not change. Even the maids were talking about how it was high timefor you to find a man. A prince they pointed out, let’s not forget. But of course they changed their conversation when they saw you walk past them.  
  
The maids maybe you could stand but even the villagers talking about it? That was too much to take for sure. You had hoped that a walk through the market (while wearing a cape for nobody to understand who you were) would help as well. But hearing more than plenty of villagers talking among themselves of how the princess had yet to find a prince to marry was just too much.  
  
Why couldn’t they just mind their own business?  
  
A knock on your door snapped you from your thoughts. Getting up to be in a sitting position you ran a hand through your hair “Come in” you mumbled.  
  
You smiled slightly when you saw Dean walk in, closing the door behind him “You wanted to see me?” he asked and you nodded.  
  
“Yes” you said with a small smile, getting up from your bed to walk towards him.  
  
“Do you think this is safe?” he asked with a frown.  
  
“Well, I asked from Anna to tell you to come here so I know that even if she suspects something she is not going to tell anybody. Do you think someone saw you come here?”  
  
He shook his head “No, nobody took notice”  
  
“Good. Because I certainly need this” you mumbled wrapped your arms around him, Dean doing the same although a little more hesitantly.  
  
“Today’s been hell” you said and earned a hum from him, Dean rubbing his hand softly on your back “Why the hell a prince?!” you asked exasperated, not really expecting an answer from Dean. You just needed to speak what had been all day on your mind.  
  
You let out a small sigh and shook your head. You buried your face in his chest and hugged him closer to you. Something, though, was not right.  
  
It was usually Dean that would wrap his arms around you and hug you like there was not tomorrow. His hugs were always the best, warm and comforting. Suffocating sometimes but always managing to assure you that it was Dean hugging you. Whereas now… it just did not feel like Dean.  
  
“Is everything alright?” you asked, pulling slightly away from him, sensing the stiffness in his body.  
  
“Yeah, yeah. Just you know. Worried in case somebody comes” he said with a forced smile.  
  
You looked at him with narrowed eyes for a while before speaking up “No. No it’s not that.Something- something’s wrong.” you pointed out.  
  
You swallowed and spoke again “Dean” you said carefully, breathing in deep breaths “What’s wrong?” you feared to hear the answer to your question.  
  
He looked at you with what looked like a sad expression on his face. He licked his lips and let out a sigh, his arms left your waist.  
  
“(Y/n)-” he started saying, running a hand down his face “We need to talk”  
  
 _Oh no_  you thought.


	9. Chapter 9

"About what?" your voice was low and a little bit shaky.  
  
"You know about what, (Y/n)" he spoke looking down at the floor.  
  
"No, no Dean I don't." you said as firmly and cautiously as you could "What is going on?"  
  
"(Y/n)" he let out a sigh "Maybe- maybe we should- This- What we have. What you and I have, I think, should... better be over. It's better if we... stop seeing each other" he managed to say after lots of trying. You felt your heart stop beating - although you knew that that's what he was going to say - your worst fear coming true as he said those words. You could see that he did not want to say anything either but yet... he did.  
  
"You-" you let out a nervous laugh "-you're kidding me now, right?" you asked him "Right?" desperation dripped your voice.  
  
The look in his eyes, though, was not giving you the answer you hoped for.  
  
"I'm sorry, but it's better this way" he muttered and took a step back and away from you.  
  
"Why?" you croaked out "Why, Dean, tell me why?!"  
  
"Because it is for the best! It was wrong all along! This- All we had was wrong all along and I never should have stayed that night in the first place! I should have pushed you away and left. Up and go. Then we-" he started saying but you cut him off.  
  
"We what, Dean? What? We would have never gone through all of the things we did. That's what you want? To never have been with me? To never have started this relationship?" you looked at him with an expression of disbelief.  
  
"It was wrong princess" he mumbled, looking down.  
  
"Princess? So I am  _princess_  now?"  
  
"Yes, princess yes. You are! That's what you don't get! You are the princess of this kingdom and I am just a knight! A soldier, a servant bound to protect you with my life. That is my duty. But I have no right to be- to be with you _this_  way!" he all-but-shouted.  
  
"You didn't seem to have problem when all of this started" you said irritated.  
  
"I was wrong! I was fucking wrong alright?" he roared at you.  
  
"No no you weren't. You did want this, Dean. Don't deny it, we both did! Because we both felt the same way! We still do and- and it is hard for me to comprehend how all of a sudden you come here and- and tell me you want it to be over!"  
  
"We were both damn wrong then! Can't you see it? This was a mistake from the beginning."  
  
"No, no you don't believe this. You can't really believe all of these things" you shook your head, tears welling up in your eyes.  
  
"Yes, yes I do." he said as firmly as possible. You could see he was trying desperately to keep his voice from cracking.  
  
"You can't really want this, do you?" your voice was barely above a whisper.  
  
"I-" he swallowed thickly "Yes, yes I do. It is for the best, princess. And you know it. It is the right thing to do."  
  
"But not what I want" your voice was really low "Not what you want either, Dean. And you know it. If you didn't then you would have never agreed to all of this. We would have never started this. I- I can't do this Dean, though. I can't let you go just like that"  
  
"But you have to, princess. Even if... we want to stay together, we can't. We can't do this, princess. You are to take over after your father soon and we both know that you can't do so alone. You need a prince by your side... And I am not one, (Y/n)- princess. I can't provide you with the things you need and I-" you cut him off before he could say more.  
  
"So that's what this is all about huh? About all of the things my father said, right? That's what suddenly made you change your mind. We were just fine yesterday and today all of a sudden you- you come and tell me this?! Just because of what my father said? I can't believe how you changed your mind so easily, Dean! I can't believe you! I honestly can't believe you! Do I really matter that little to you that you are willing to just give me away because my father- because my father said all of things he did?! Because he thinks that I should marry a prince to be able to rule the kingdom right?" you all-but-screamed at him, throwing your hands in the air.  
  
"No! Not because of your father, (Y/n)!" he roared "Because of everybody else! Didn't you hear them? We were together a couple hours earlier out in the market! We both heard them! And it wasn't just a couple people! All of them, almost all of them kept saying how it is time for you to marry someone so you can take over! Because they need you to take over! And they all said that it has to be a prince! How the fucking hell do you think they would react if they found out about what is going on between you and me, huh? How will you marry a prince if you are stuck with- with someone like  _me_?" you could hear the venom in his voice as he spoke of himself as if he was unworthy of anything good. That he never deserved anything good in his life.  
  
"But I don't want to! I don't fucking want to marry another man when I want you Dean! I want you!" you screamed at him the tears that had welled up in your eyes started running down your cheeks "I only want to be with you, Dean. Why can't you understand that?" your voice cracked "Why do you push me away?" you ended up asking in a mumble.  
  
Dean took in a shaky breath and opened his mouth to speak "Because that is the right thing to do. It was- it was great while it lasted but it's better this way because- It is the only way (Y/n)." he spoke in a low and rough voice "We have no choice. That's what you don't understand. All those people out there depend on you. Their lives depend on you, (Y/n). There is no room for us to be selfish and you damn know it! It is wrong to keep doing this anymore. What do you think everybody else, your parents included, will think of you when they find out- Because they are! Did you really believe that there was any chance of us keeping this up for ever?"  
  
You looked at him with an expression of disbelief "I can't believe you're saying this. You can't be saying this" you shook your head.  
  
"I am sorry but it's better if we-" he swallowed the lump in his throat, averted his eyes from you and your tear-stained face "If we end this here. You- you belong with another man. A prince that will help you rule this kingdom right. I.. have no place by your side." it pained him to say these things but he knew that he had to.  
  
"Dean please" your lower lip trembled "I know- I know that this is not what you want. You do not want this either Dean, please don't do this. We- we can keep this going a-and find a way in the meantime. Please Dean I-I can't be without you. Please don't end this like this. I know that you don't want this Dean! You don't! Why do you want to push me away when you feel the same?"  
  
"Because it is the right thing to do. I know you will understand at some point that... you and I don't belong together. You know it, you just don't want to accept it. And if you can't back away from this then I will" he tried to say as strongly as he could.  
  
"So that's just it then? You're going to walk away and out of the door and this- all we had, all we ever went through is just going to be over? You're just going to forget all of the things that happened between us? All of the things you felt? Of me? Just like that? Like it never happened?" you raised your eyebrows at him, tears rolling down your cheeks in rivers.  
  
Dean looked at you for a good while, silence having now surrounded you. The only thing that could be heard was your sniffling and occasional sobs. Dean clenched his fists and looked at you straight in the eyes. His breath had hitched on his throat and he found himself unable to breath, his heart felt tight and ached, his stomach heavy like a rock as he fought to keep the tears in  
  
He took in a shaky breath and opened his mouth to speak "Yes." his voice was low, his own tears that threatened to spill were lacing it and making it more rough than it normally was "Yes I am. And so should you. We do not belong together (Y/n) no matter how much we try." he gave you a sad shrug and you nodded at his words, the tears still not stopping.  
  
You looked down at the floor and wiped out the tears that just couldn't stop rolling "Very well. If that is what you want. I can't really force you, right? Don't worry. I won't bother you with my presence, either. We have lots of knights in the castle, don't want to force you to sacrifice your life for someone you think is not worth it" you looked up at him with a visibly-fake smile.  
  
"You may go now. I don't require your help." you said, your face and voice, void of any emotion.  
  
You turned your back to him and looked out of the window, pursing your lips to keep the sobs from escaping. Silence was the only thing that could be heard in the room as Dean did not make a move from where he was. You could feel his eyes at your back and you only felt your hands shaking more as you had them in front of you, clenched in fists and holding the fabric of your dress tightly. You could slightly see his reflection in the glass of the window as he just stared at you. You saw him after a long while give you a small bow and slowly turn to walk towards the door. Exiting it and letting it close softly behind him.  
  
The moment it had clicked shut your mouth opened slightly and sobs escaped your throat as you collapsed on the floor, your knees gave away. You clenched the fabric of your dress in your fists as sobs shook your head, tears falling on your fists. You could not stop the tears or the sobs that made you shake uncontrollably. You put your face in your hands and cried your eyes out.  
  
That's all you did. All you could do. Lay on the cold floor, even as you run out of tears till sleep enveloped you. Not muttering a word when Anna found you the next morning, worry etching her features.  
  
You did not say a single word as you only let her take care of you.  
  
Not a single word.  
  
~~~  
  
That's how it went on for the first couple days. You would barely go out of your room, only when it was necessary. Most of the time it was for dinner, although you prefered for them to bring the tray with your food at your room. You didn't eat much and most times Anna or one of the maids had to force you to eat at least half of your food. Whenever you were eating with your parents you tried not to show the condition you were in but that was definitely not something easy. That just meant that your mother had picked up on it.  
  
Your father had as well but you just tried to brush them off with the excuse of your possible wedding. Your father seemed to believe you but your mother, well, she didn't believe a single word you told them. She kept insisting on you to tell her, to let out everything that was hurting you, to explain to her what was happening to you but... you didn't. No matter how many times she insisted you would just come up with an excuse to brush her off.  
  
You were just lucky that she didn't have that much time to keep asking you. Your birthday was soon approaching and lots of people, most of them nobles, were invited to the ball that would be thrown for you. That only meant that your mother, and you, had to make sure everything was well organized even in the smallest detail. You weren't going to do all the preparations by yourself of course but they surely needed your approval before they continued with what they were about to do. It was not an easy task, definitely boring if you got to think about it - having to choose what color the tablecloths should have was really not something you liked doing in your free time.  
  
And as if that was not enough, you had to welcome the people that came in advance. Every time, as if it was one of the greatest events, friends and family members of your parents would come in advance - like two or three days prior (or hell even a week) - and stay at the castle till your birthday and the ball. Some even stayed after the night of the ball. It was not really bad, considering that you liked some of them, but others? Well, others were pretty annoying if you were honest and you had to admit that you had pictured killing them in more ways than you could. Just like those little Mikaelson kids.  
  
The worst of all was the dress. You had to do so many dress fittings these days that it had honestly driven you insane. It was always something you hated when it came to your birthday. You didn't know why they had to make a special dress for you to wear on your birthday but every time it managed to drive you insane. All that fitting, all that standing on top of a chair so that they could adjust things on it, all those corsets your had to put and take off - literally leaving you breatheless - had you grumpy for the rest of the day every single time.  
  
But this time you were actually thankful for all of that. You were even thankful for the freaking annoying kids that ran around the room where the ball would be held, as you spoke with either the chefs for the food or some others for the decorations, annoying the hell out of you. They were all just distractions and you were... glad for that. You were glad for all of the distractions you could get because you honestly did not want to have a single second free to think. After the first couple days you had started feeling better - as much as you could - and tried to look strong in front of others. It was all mostly thanks to all of these distractions.  
  
You wanted to take your mind off of Dean and all of the things that had happened just a couple days ago. You actually didn't want to think about it - and mostly him -  _at all_. You didn't want to think about the things he had told to you and above all you didn't want to think about all of the things you had been through with him. All those pleasant memories - you could not deny the feeling he gave you - would swim through your mind, though. The feelings coming back along with them and you were unable to keep the tears from rolling. You had many times cried yourself to sleep. You tried to be strong and not do so. You tried to push the feelings and memories away but it was impossible. At least when you were alone. It hurt. It hurt like hell but you tried your best to keep everything at bay. You knew you had to.  
  
But, just as you seemed to be succeeding - or at least were distracted enough - there he was. Whether you were walking through the garden, head bowed as you looked at the flowers, whether you were on your balcony breathing in some fresh air then he would be there. Either walking a few steps away from you or under your balcony - always in deep thought - he would look up at some point and of course spot you. Your eyes locking and you could always see that the expression on his face was one of pure hurt. You could see how broken he was and in how much pain he was. At moments you contemplated on running to him, enveloping him in your arms and telling him that you wanted to be with him again.  
  
 _ **Dean was many times on the verge of doing that.**_  
  
But every time you would just take a deep breath, purse your lips and wipe out every sort of emotion from your face. Abruptly turning your head on the other side and just keep walking as if you had not seen him. Most times you would just pretend you hadn't seen him and walk away from him. Others, when he was close and speaking, you would just pretend that you didn't hear him. Sometimes, when you visited the training area with your father you would just walk away from him when he came close to you and your father and many times opted for talking to another knight that was there and you had luckily gotten to know a while back ago. You tried to look more interested in him and what he was saying, just like Dean with your father, but when you felt his eyes on your form almost all the time you couldn't help but turn ever-so-slightly your head an glance at him. Whenever your eyes locked you would just lift your head as if you were almost glaring at him and with a final hard look you turned your head the other way.  
  
 _Every single time you missed the look of hurt on Dean's face who just swallowed hard, trying to control himself (and the pain he felt), and turned his head to look at your father. Forcing on a smile that he did not feel in the least bit and just going along with what your father was saying._  
  
You always did the same. Whenever he was close you barely glanced at him, preferring to look anywhere but him, and only when you were 'forced' to because somebody was present and you didn't want to raise suspicions would you utter a few words to him. Only then.  
  
~~~  
  
You shook your head as you walked down the hallway to the throne room. Your father had called you but you didn't know why. It was probably another relative or friend just having arrived (your birthday was tomorrow - along with the ball) and as usual he wanted you to be there to greet them.  
  
You couldn't help the feeling in your gut that told you that this was something more than just that. That it was not just another guest you had to greet. That the person you were about to meet was much more than just a guest at the ball. And it honestly scared you because you knew that your father would not hesitate to act on his word.  
  
What he had told you just a couple days ago still echoed in your ears. You coud still-  
  
"Ow!" you exclaimed with a groan as soon as you fell on the hard cold floor.  
  
You were so much in deep thought and your eyes were casted down that you had seen the person you had just bumped into.  
  
You rubbed your forehead and opened your eyes to look up at the person.  
  
Your eyes almost widened when you looked at the handsome prince bending down to check up on you, a worried expression on his beautiful face.  
  
 _"Arthur?"_


	10. Chapter 10

  
"Arthur?" you breathed out as you looked up at the blonde prince.  
  
"I knew one day you were going to fall for me" he said with a smirk and chuckle, looking down at you on the floor.  
  
All you could do was roll your eyes and then accept his offered hand, getting up from the cold floor.  
  
"You'd wish" you scoffed at him and letting out a chuckle he spoke.  
  
"Not as much as you would" he winked playfully and you couldn't help the laughter that left your mouth at that moment.  
  
You've always had this kind of relationship with him. It was much more different from how you acted in public or with other people and you grately enjoyed it. He always managed to lift your spirits, ever since you were little kids, even if you were feeling really bad. He knew when to joke around with you to make you feel better, when to flirt with you to make you laugh and when to be serious because you were not feeling like doing much talking. All in all he was a great man (let's not forget that he was really handsome as well) but even better friend.  
  
That's what he was to you. Friend. You would never be able to see him any other way and even though he would constantly tease you or make moves on you he knew it as well.  
  
"Ah I missed you so much" you mumbled, your face buried in his chest as you hugged each other tightly.  
  
"Missed you too, (Y/n)" he mumbled as well.  
  
"Been a while, huh?" he asked once you both pulled away, one of his hands cupping your cheek.  
  
"A pretty long while" you said with a small nod of your head.  
  
"Why didn't you come to visit?"  
  
"Why didn't  _you_  come to visit, mister?" you asked back, poking his chest.  
  
"Lots of things happening in Camelot" he shrugged "I'll explain later. Come. Morgana's been waiting to see you"  
  
"Really? She's here with you? What are we waiting for, then? Come on!" you said excited and took the few steps - rather quickly - to the main throne room where you were sure they would all be.  
  
"Wow well, yeah I am happy to be here as well. I really missed you just as much, (Y/n)." he said sarcastically and you turned to give him a playful glare.  
  
"You know I haven't seen her for longer, Arthur. So yes, I miss her a little bit more than I missed you. You know she's like a sister to me" you said matter-of-factly.  
  
"Missed her more than me? Oh this is a stab to the heart. The woman of my life had betrayed me" he said over-dramatically and you playfully hit his shoulder.  
  
"You know, I don't think you should take after your father as a king. You are the perfect drama  _queen_ " you said and he playfully glared at you.  
  
"Come on, let's go" he said and you both entered the room.  
  
"Morgana!" you exclaimed as soon as you saw your best friend.  
  
"(Y/n)" she breathed out, a big smile appeared on her face; matching that of yours.  
  
You both ran to each other and hugged tightly.  
  
"Oh my, look at you! You've changed so much! You're so beautiful" you said with a smile, looking at her once you pulled away.  
  
"Me? Oh dear, but look at you!" she said with a bright smile, squeezing your shoulders softly "It just seems that with each year passing you become even more beautiful!"  
  
You giggled softly "Well, then thank you" you said and peaked over her shoulder to see-  
  
"Merlin!" you exclaimed happily. He was Arthur's servant but you considered him a friend as well, seeing how kind he actually was to you and didn't pretend in front of you.  
  
"Princess" he gave you a small bow.  
  
"Oh please, just (Y/n)" you scoffed "Neither my father nor King Uther are here so no need for formalities. Now come here!" you said and moving away from Morgana you walked to him and enveloped him in your arms.  
  
He let out a huff of air, obviously taken aback by your gesture, but soon he hugged you back.  
  
"Always great to see you (Y/n)" he said with a smile and you nodded at him.  
  
"Great to see you as well Merlin. Just as much great it is to see you are still standing after all of the things I am sure Arthur's put you through" you said with a giggle and Merlin only nodded at our words.  
  
"It is a surprise for me as well" he mumbled and you laughed more.  
  
"Where are they though? Our fathers." you asked turning to look at Arthur.  
  
"Said they couldn't wait much and had things to talk about. You'll see him at dinner" Arthur replied, referring to his father.  
  
"Great, then we have the chance to talk a little bit before, right?" you asked turning to look at Morgana.  
  
"Definitely. Gwen is at my room, putting my things in place. Come on let's go there." she said, linking arms with you "I have lots of things to tell you" she whispered in your ear and you giggled, knowing that they were going to be really interesting.  
  
"Alright. See you later then" you gave Arthur and Merlin a smile and both you and Morgana made your way to her room.  
  
...  
  
Silence followed for a while till Arthur heard something "Beautiful" Merlin breathed out, voice barely audible; his eyes glued to your form as you left.  
  
Arthur looked at him with a pointed look "You say that again?"  
  
Merlin turned his head to look at him with almost wide eyes "I-I did not- I said nothing. Nothing."  
  
"Yeah. You say that nothing again and you're going to be cleaning my armor non-stop for the next three weeks, got it?" he told him with a glare and ony when he turned his back to him and could not see him, Merlin rolled his eyes at him.  
  
"And don't you roll your eyes at me or else I am going to make it five weeks" Arthur said.  
  
~~~  
  
"Thank you Gwen" you said to the girl as she offered you with the cup of warm tea.  
  
"You may leave now, I don't need anything" Morgana told her and with a small bow she was out of the room.  
  
"So...?" you started and she looked at you with a smirk.  
  
"'So' what?" she asked and you rolled your eyes.  
  
"You said you had lots of things to tell me and I know that look very well. Did something happen with somebody?" you said with a knowing look on your face.  
  
"Well, yes. Almost. Sort of, in fact. It is pretty complicated. But I think you should tell me first" she said with a half smile.  
  
"Me? What should I tell you. I don't think I have anything to tell you" you tried to say casually.  
  
"Oh but I think you do. Come on (Y/n), don't lie to me. Something's happened. I can see it. You- you look different and I don't mean in just appearance because it has only been one year from the last time I saw you." she said calmly and you avoided looking in her eyes.  
  
"Nothing- nothing's happened Morgana" you mumbled "Nothing important at least" you said letting out a sad sigh, looking down at the cup in your hands "Let's-" you swallowed the lump in your throat "Let's no talk about that now, though. You said something had  _sort of_ happened. What is it? You met someone?" you asked her.  
  
She hesitated to speak, clearly understanding how you were trying to change the topic "Uh yeah. Yeah I have met someone." she said and you nodded, taking a small sip of your tea.  
  
"His name's Sam Winchester" she said and you choked on your tea.  
  
She patted your back as you tried to recover. You coughed a few more times, as you gained your breath "What?" you breathed out, setting your cup of tea on the tray that was there.  
  
This surely had to be a joke.  
  
"Uh yeah his name is Sam Winchester. I uh I met him a couple months ago as he came to work at the castle's library. He studies the books there and translates them in other languages and now writes the royal letters that need to be sent and are confidential. Yeah, I know what you think. He is a servant and it is not right for me to have feelings for him but-" she started speaking but you cut her off.  
  
"No, no Morgana. It may not be right according to others but if- if you feel like it then don't suppress it. And don't hold back. If you have feelings for him then don't hesitate to show it. Act on them" your voice was low and slightly raspy.  
  
"You think? I mean I- I am not sure. He does make me feel great, that is for sure. He is an amazing man, funny, cute, kind and really handsome. He is really sweet with me every time I visit the library and he seems to have an interest in me as well. I just- I don't know. I am not sure if I should do something. I mean- is it right?"  
  
"Does it feel like it?" you asked her back and after a while of thinking she gave you a small nod "Then don't wait a second. Act on your feelings before it's too late" your voice was really low and anyone could see the hint of sadness in it.  
  
Morgana did notice it. A frown set on her face as she saw you look down at your hands, biting your lip; your eyes almost glistening with... tears?  
  
She opened her mouth to speak but a knock on the door stopped her from doing so "Come in" she said, looking between the door and you.  
  
"My lady-" your body stiffened and your back straightened as you took in a sharp inhale, your head snapped up to the person's direction as soon as the first words were said "My princess" he continued saying, his eyes moving from Morgana to you and staying there.  
  
"Our King has asked that you head to the dining room. Dinner is ready" Dean said, his eyes not leaving yours.  
  
Morgana nodded slightly at him but frowned as she looked between you and Dean, from his sad-looking (mostly hurt-looking) face to your pained expression that you were trying to mask by putting on a stoic, almost hard-looking, expression on. Your eyes gave away all of your emotions.  
  
You clenched your jaw and pursed your lips, taking in a sharp breath and turning your head the other direction from Dean. You scolded yourself mentally for allowing yourself to show even the slight sign of emotion to him. The moment you looked into his almost pleading eyes you couldn't tear yours from his even if you tried.  
  
Your heart hammered in your chest as you looked down at your hands, biting your lip so hard you could draw blood.  
  
Morgana's frown deepened as she looked at you and then back at the look on Dean's face. The heartbroken look on his face, full of regret and sorry.  
  
"Tell them we'll be there soon" Morgana said, snapping his attention to her for just a few second.  
  
He gave her a small nod and bow and after a long glance at you he exited, although he seemed to not want to, the room. Closing the door softly behind him.  
  
You let out a shaky breath you didn't even know you'd been holding for so long and blinked a couple times to push the tears away.  
  
"Alright. I think it is time for you to start speaking. And above all explain that" she said crossing her arms in front of her chest.  
  
You looked at her and gave her a small and hesitant nod. Swallowing the lump in your throat you spoke.  
  
~~~  
  
You let out a huff of air as one of your maids tightened even more the corset around you. You would have protested if it wasn't for much more important things running through your mind at the moment. You had told Morgana about everything that had happened between you and Dean. You were hesitant in the beginning but you really needed to talk to somebody and let everything out. As expected Morgana had promised not to tell anybody anything and had only comforted you the best way she could. You actually were happy to have a friend like her because having to face Dean sitting right ahead of you during dinner (your father had once again invited him) and having to pretend like everything was alright certainly meant that you needed somebody to hold your hand. Luckily Morgana that was sitting right next to you played that role.  
  
Time had passed by really quickly, that was for sure. One moment you were talking with Arthur trying to get your mind off of things - and ignore the glares Dean sent Arthur's way - and the next here you were wearing your dress while preparing yourself for the ball. You tried not to think about anything, Dean on top of all, but...  
  
...It was hard considering the fact that he would be the one to escort you all the way to the ballroom.  
  
And then- then it was even harder to keep yourself from thinking of just those looks from Dean. The glares you reminded yourself every time. You did not want to let your hopes up and certainly to keep yourself from fluttering at the thought of Dean actually being jealous of how close you and Dean were. Sure nothing was going on between you and the prince but the way you two interacted, how close you were, all those giggles and laughter shared and of course those touches ment much more to somebody that did not know. Your father in the beginning fo your friendship with Arthur had hoped that something was going between you and him, especially at seeing you two, but soon realized that that was the way you two acted. But of course Dean did not know that so it was only logical for him to be... jealous? Yo literally fought with yourself to keep that spark of hope inside you that meant that you still had feelings for him and wanted him to do the same as well. Because even if some part of you knew you did you still did not want to accept it. He had hurt you beyond belief and you just did not want to still have feelings for him and hope.  
  
But those pointed glares, the narrowed eyes and clenched jaws and of curse the way his voice came out whenever he spoke to Arthur meant so much more. Not to mention how he seemed to always be there to ruin your moments alone with Arthur, clearing his throat to get your attention or snapping sarcastic comments at the blonde prince. You tried to fight off th thoughts but you knew that it was going to be impossible to, now that he was going to be here any given moment.  
  
You were not 100% sure that your father was going to send him but considering how much he seemed to trust him with you it was highly possible.  
  
A knock on your door snapped you from your thoughts and just made the maids rush a little more.  
  
"Just some final touches" Anna mumbled to herself as she fixed your hair, you had not even realized when they had managed to finish all those things "And you're ready, my princess. You look stunning" she said with a smile.  
  
You gave a her a small one in return and got up from your seat, making your way to your door. You opened it and immediately felt your breath hitch on your throat. Because, sure as hell, there he was. And damn him he did look good.  
  
He was not wearing his everyday clothes, not even his well-cleaned shining armor that he used to wear on special occasions or when he had returned from war with your father. He was wearing a suit. It was white and you'd be lying if you said he didn't look like an angel in that. It brightened his whole presence. It had a few golden parts here and there, the buttons were gold as well, and he had what looked like a golden badge on the left side of his chest, just were his heart was, with the sign of your kingdom. A pentagram on top of wings. He was wearing a white shirt underneath as well and you didn't miss to notice a belt with gold parts and of course his silver and shining sword attached to it. It was not just his clothes that were different, though. It seemed as if him as well was different. His face seemed more clean, he had just shaved you could see it clearly, and his hair moved back to the side. If anyone saw him right now for the first time they would assume that he was a prince for sure.  
  
"Wow" he breathed out in a really low voice and you locked eyes with his.  
  
"I assume my father sent you to escort me. Shall we?" your voice was soft.  
  
He gave you a small nod and standing next to him you linked arms with his and you both walked towards the ballroom. You felt Dean's eyes on you all the time but did not dare turn your head to look at him because you knew that there would be no going back after that. You knew that with just a look of his he could have you giving in again, succumbing to him. Breaking down again.  
  
"You're really beautiful" he said, his voice filled with awe.  
  
You dared glance at him for a second "Thank you" you mumbled.  
  
It was obvious how much you were struggling to keep yourself from breaking down at the moment. Your uneven breathing proved to that fact.  
  
Dean bit his lip and looked at you with a pain expression "(Y/n)-" he started speaking only for you to cut him off.  
  
"Princess" you abruptly said, turning to look at him "It's princess. I am the princess, Dean. And you are just a knight. I don't believe you have forgotten that?" you raised an eyebrow at him.  
  
Dean looked at you and then down at his feet as you walked "No, princess. No." he muttered.  
  
"Good" you looked ahead of you as you neared the ballroom "Because you were the one that pointed it out in the beginning"  
  
And you entered...


	11. Chapter 11

You felt overwhelmed. You had to say, though, that it was a pleasant overwhelming. They had done a fantastic job, better than any other time before, with the decorations. Maybe it was mostly attributed to the fact that you had given your opinion on most of the matters and checked every little detail before they could go on with their plans. The previous years you rarely paid much attention to such things but this year everything was different (for sure) and in order to take your mind off of the things that were happening you prefered to pay extra attention to how the ball was going to be organized.  
  
You took in a sharp inhale at seeing how many people had come. It wasn't the fact that they were so many - many more than the previous times - that scared you but the fact that most of them were princes (you only assumed). Seeing, also, your father converse with a few of them was no good sign either.  
  
Without realizing it you had clenched your hands, therefore you had given Dean's arm a small squeeze. He placed a hand upon yours and made you turn your head so that you were looking at him.  
  
"Everything ok?" he was staring deeply in your eyes, his own were full of concern.  
  
He knew that nothing was ok but putting on your bravest face, and trying to not show many emotions, you nodded at him.  
  
"Everything's absolutely fine" you said in an almost harsh voice tone, trying to show Dean that you were not talking just about the ball but about what was happening between him and you.  
  
"Come on now, my parents are waiting" you said again before he could speak.  
  
He gave you a small nod and averted his eyes to the floor, a small sad frown was on his face, and you both walked towards your parents.  
  
You walked down the stares and both you and Dean straightened your posture and looked ahead of you, trying to look as if everything was fine. It was harder for you because you even had to plaster a smile on your face, pretending to be happy.  
  
Happy.  
  
You scoffed at the mere idea of it. Happy was a word you had forgotten these days.  
  
Everybody clapped and cheered as you entered the main ballroom and you nodded your head as a small thank you to most of them.  
  
"And there she is!" your father said with a wide smile as you approached them.  
  
"Happy birthday, dear" he said more softly as he came to hug you.  
  
You had to let go of Dean's arm and as much as you hated yourself for it you missed the closeness and feeling of comfort it gave you already. Damn him.  
  
"Thanks dad" you told him with a soft smile and proceeded to hug your mother who whispered to you and equally soft 'Happy Birthday'.  
  
"You look ravishing tonight, (Y/n)" your father and you gave him a sheepish shrug.  
  
"I didn't do anything"  
  
He laughed "Of course you didn't. I was just saying this because, you know, there are lots of princes here tonight"  
  
You immediately rolled your eyes as soon as the words left his mouth "Dad please. No."  
  
"I'm sorry, but yes. Look, (Y/n) I believe I gave you enough time to find somebody you loved on your own but since that has not happened yet then... I'm sorry to tell you, but you will have to choose on of them.  _Tonight_." he put his hands on your shoulders.  
  
"I did you a favor and did not choose somebody on my own but you- you have to choose someone from them tonight, dear. Look, I'm not even going to force you. You can dance with as many or whoever of them you want to, it's up to you. But you will have to do so, no matter what." he added, giving your shoulders a small squeeze.  
  
"And- what if I don't want to dance with any of them?" you raised and eyebrow at him.  
  
"(Y/n)" he let out a sigh "You have to. Just find someone to start with and you see for others later"  
  
"And what if I don't want to dance at all tonight. Nobody here seems good enough, whatsoever" you crossed your arms over your chest.  
  
You were being childish, you knew it, but you couldn't help it either. You didn't want to dance with any of them much less have to choose between them for... a husband.  
  
You cringed at the mere thought of it.  
  
"Dear, you know that is something out of the question. This ball is held for you and your birthday, you can't simply not dance. At least once. Try dancing at least once." he tried to reason with you.  
  
"Who then? Just tell me who. Because I refuse to dance with any of them" you said glancing at some princes a few feet away.  
  
"Well..." your father trailed off, not really knowing who would be the best choice for your first dance.  
  
"My King" said a voice before your father could say more. You both turned to look at Dean.  
  
"If the princess is having trouble choosing among the princes who to dance with then... I could get you out of the trouble." he said as formally as he could and you clenched slightly your fists, fearing to hear him say more.  
  
"Maybe I could have that first dance with her?" he ended up asking, obviously trying not to show how much he wanted to have a dance with you "If- if you think it is the right thing to do of course, your majesty" he was fast to add, mostly at seeing the frown on your father's face.  
  
"That's-" he started saying, scratching his small beard as if in thought, his brows were frowned slightly "-A splendid idea!" he beamed with a smile.  
  
Dean's face lit up with a smile of his own but a frown set on yours. It was not that you did not want to dance with him - God knows how much you wanted to - but you also feared it. You feared how you would feel being so close to Dean again. You feared how he would make you feel. But on top of all you feared that you were going to just give in. To him. And to the pain you felt but were trying so desperately to hide.  
  
"But- but the first dance always belongs to Arthur, father. He always is the first one I dance with at balls" you a little bit too quickly, missing the look of hurt that flashed through Dean's eyes. Especially at the mention of Arthur's name.  
  
You've always been close as friends but Dean didn't know it. And there was only thing for him to assume when he saw you almost all the time together, laughing and being so close to each other.  
  
"I know, but Arthur is somewhere in the crowd offering a first dance to Morgana. Besides, the idea of you and my most trusted knight having a first dance on your birthday ball seems ideal! I don't think you would have a problem, after all, right?" your father ended up asking you.  
  
"No. Of course not" you said with a forced small smile. It wasn't exactly a lie, more like half-truth, but the complete truth was that you were scared to be so close to him again.  
  
"Great then!" he said with a bright smile and motioned for you and Dean to get going.  
  
You really doubted he would be so excited if he knew the whole truth about what had happened between you and Dean.  
  
You took Dean's extended hand and looking down you both made your way to the center of the ballroom where everybody was dancing.  
  
While still holding Dean's one hand you put the other one on his chest as his made its way around your waist. You were dancing to the soft music, just swaying slightly. You felt yourself take in a sharp breath when instead of staying where it was his hand moved it a little higher to your exposed back. His skin came into contact with yours and you felt shivers run down your spine, reminding you just of that first night when you told him how you felt. You shook your head slightly, trying to push away the memories but in vain when he started rubbing small and soothing circles in your back with his thumb. Your breathing became slow and heavy as you felt him press you closer to his body, almost no gap was separating you now. Shots of electricity ran through you as his hand stayed to the exposed part of your back and you cursed yourself for letting the maids make this kind of dress. Your back was not completely exposed. Just about two thirds of it, just enough for a princess to look modest yet beautiful.  
  
You took in a breath but it came in as a shaky one and you cursed yourself for already showing what he was doing to you.  
  
"Can you stop that?" it came out in a low hiss.  
  
He was taken aback for a few seconds "Sorry" he mumbled looking down for a while, immediately stopping the movement though.  
  
"Happy birthday, by the way" he said, trying to lighten the mood.  
  
You scoffed slightly and looked at him from the corner of your eyes as your head was turned on the other direction "Thanks" you said as bitterly and sarcastically as you could but immediately regretted it when you saw the look on Dean's face. It actually broke your heart at seeing the look of kicked puppy on his features but you couldn't help it. You had to be cold towards him. You had to be stoic. You had to be emotionless. You had to act indifferent to him. And you had to act angry. Even if deep inside you just wanted to kiss him and tell him how much you lo-  
  
"I'm sorry" he said again and you slowly turned your head to look at him, your features softening just slightly.  
  
"I heard that" you muttered.  
  
"No, not about that. I- I'm sorry... for everything that happened between us" he said and your body immediately stiffened.  
  
"It was a huge mistake" he added and you glared slightly at him.  
  
"You made it pretty much obvious when you asked me to break up, Dean. There is no need for you to repeat it again" you snapped at him.  
  
"No, no" he breathed out "No, I didn't mean that."  
  
"Then what?" you snapped at him again.  
  
He let out a sigh and looked at you with what could only be described as pleading eyes "The break up. It was a mistake. I should have never asked you something like that. I honestly don't know what got over me. It was such a huge mistake and I regret it, (Y/n). I regret it. I am so sorry I asked you something like that. But I most of all am sorry I said of all of those things. Damn it-" he gritted his teeth "-I don't know what the hell got over me. I don't know why I freaking said all of those things. It wasn't a mistake. Us being together was not a mistake. I don't regret it. I never will."  
  
"Damn it was one of the best things that ever happened to me and I-" he started speaking again, stopping abruptly to shake his head "Won't you say something?" he asked you in a low voice.  
  
"I-I don't know what you expect me to say, Dean. You've already said more than enough for the both of us. You did that day. I pleaded for you to stay so that we could work it out but you didn't. You said that you and I did not belong together and now... I am not going to say any different. You were right Dean. You were right then. Besides, I don't really know what you expect me to do now. Why are you even saying all of this? You believe that just like that everything is going to change?" you shook your head at your own words.  
  
"Just let it go, Dean. We were just not meant to be together, that's all. Maybe it was a beautiful dream while it all lasted but we're now awake. And that's how I want to stay" you said as coldly as you could.  
  
You averted your eyes from his so that you could not see the look on his face anymore. You were sure that if you kept staring at those pleading green orbs any longer then you would soon give in. It was hard as it was already. You had imagined many times about him coming to you, asking for your forgiveness and saying that he wanted to be with you again. That he was mistaken after all. And you would have most probably just jumped in his arms and kissed him like there was no tomorrow, forgetting everything that had been said and done. And most of all you would have forgotten the pain he had made you feel just for his sake. But you knew that it was better... this way. Putting an end to all of this was the only solution.  
  
And yet here he was. Saying that he was sorry, that he regretted everything he had said. That he wanted you back. And you... you said no. No to him. No to being with him.  
  
Even if it felt like tearing your own heart into shreds then your were willing to do it... for him.  
  
"(Y/n)-" he started speaking again only for you to cut him off.  
  
"It's Princess, Dean" you corrected him "I am your princess, don't forget that. And please let's not talk about that anymore, alright. It is my birthday after all. I believe I deserve this favor from you"  
  
You could see the pain in his eyes and you were sure you were hurting him more than you intended. You were literally on the verge of taking everything back but you knew you couldn't.  _For his own sake_. Besides, it hurt you more to say these things than it hurt him, you were sure.  
  
"As you wish" he said, clenching his jaw and pursing his lips. You felt his hand squeeze slightly yours but you didn't mind. You could see how he was trying to fight the tears and if clenching his hands would help then so be it. After all, that's what you were trying to do as well.  
  
"It is better this way and you know it. You were right in the first place. It is the only way to avoid it, anyway" you muttered.  
  
"Avoid what?"  
  
"Death. That's what all this is about and you know it. You're just scared of death" you couldn't help but say bitterly. It was a thought that had been running through your mind ever since you and him broke up.  
  
"I'm not scared of death. I never was." he said with a frown at what you were just saying.  
  
"Yeah, right" you scoffed, rolling your eyes.  
  
"No. No, I was never scared of death. You know very well that I would risk my life if need be to save you. Without a second thought" he wanted to shout at you but kept a low and firm voice.  
  
"Then why? And please don't tell me you tried to push me away just because nobody would approve. You and I both know how this would end. One of us would die. And it would not be me. If it kept going you know that my father would sooner or later find out. And that's how it would end. With you dead. So tell me Dean Winchester so scared are you of death?"  
  
"I'm not scared of death. I'm scared of being somewhere where you would not be. Somewhere where I would not see you" he spoke "But you clearly fail to see that. That's- that's what you were thinking weren't you? That I pushed you away because I was scared for myself. Of what your father would do to me."  
  
"Weren't you?" you raised an eyebrow at him and he shook his head.  
  
"You don't know me at all, after all. You're so high up your throne that you think people only care about themselves. Well, news flash sweetheart. Not all people think like  _you_. " you had by now stopped dancing "Not everybody cares about their pretty little ass all the time like you do. There are people out there that fight for others even if they have nothing. And they don't care if they lose their lives. They keep fighting for what they want, taking risks, while you sit here in your pretty little throne and ordering people around for your little needs, being a  _ **bitch**_  to th-" he abruptly stopped before he could say anything more when your palm collided with his cheek in a rather loud slap.  
  
Tears had welled up in your eyes as you didn't dare think of what more he would say if you let him. You were just lucky that there were so many people, busy while dancing or talking that didn't notice anything - or your parents didn't see you.  
  
"Fuck you" you spit the words at him and taking hold of your dress you lifted it slightly and walked away from him as fast as possible.  
  
Tears were about to fall as you practically ran your way out of the ballroom. Dean's words echoed in your mind and it felt like a stab to the heart. He had never spoken to you like that and you didn't dare think of what he would say if you hadn't slapped him. Did he really think like that about you? That you were just a little bitch that cared only about herself and nobody else? That you only wanted to satisfy yourself, get what you want, an not think about others? That you were just like all of the other princesses that were so high up their thrones and bitched about everything and everyone every second of their day? Did he really think that you were just another rich girl like them? Did he-  
  
"My lady?" a smooth voice snapped your out of your thoughts.  
  
You brushed away the tears - rather violently - and looking up from the flowers of the garden you were now and straightened your back.  
  
"My lady, is everything alright?" the same voice asked once again.  
  
You slowly and hesitantly turned your head to the direction the voice came from, as you tried your best to wipe out a few stray tears.  
  
You had to look further up to see the face of the stranger that had spoke to you and...  
  
... you felt your breath hitch on your throat.  
  
 _Oh dear_


	12. Chapter 12

You felt your breath hitch on your throat- or more like the air being knocked out of your lungs as your eyes locked with his. Only one thought was running through your mind.  
  
 _Damn he is handsome_  
  
You really had to acknowledge that because damn him he was. And coming from you, who had seen so many men over the past years while your father tried to find you the right one to marry, meant something.  
  
Especially now that you had met Dean.  
  
But this man- this man was much more different than him. Handsome in his own way.  
  
Tall. He was certainly really tall. Slim, the good kind of way. You couldn't see clearly under all those clothes but you could clearly imagine that although he was not built like Dean with broad shoulders and chest it was sure that he would have equally good body features. You didn't care much about that, though. His face was what captivated you. A ginger close to blonde beard covered his face, matching the color of his slightly long hair that were brushed back. His slim lips were pursed, forming a line as he looked at you with a deep frown. His cheekbones were prominent but what you found yourself captivated by was his eyes. The blue color of them made you think as if you were looking at the sky itself. Your mind was blank as you stared back into his eyes and literally found yourself out of breath.  
  
"My lady?" his smooth voice broke you out of your trail of thoughts and you blinked a few times.  
  
"Are you alright?" he repeated his previous question.  
  
A small smirk was about to play on his lips as he had noticed you staring but the concern he felt surpassed it and a frown was set on his handsome features.  
  
"I uh yeah, yeah I'm fine" you muttered averting your eyes from his because you knew that he would be able to see right through you and your lie.  
  
"My apologies" he said and you looked up at him "I had no right to ask you something that is obviously personal to you."  
  
"No, no it is alright" you shook your head slightly.  
  
"Pardon me. It was just a really sad sight to see a beautiful face as yours stained and such shining eyes dull with tears" he said ever-so-softly.  
  
"No it is alright" you said with a forming smile "And thank you" you said sheepishly.  
  
"There is no need to thank me, my lady. I am merely saying the truth." he smiled ever so slightly "Excuse my curiosity but I wanted to ask you if something is the matter"  
  
He asked you indirectly and letting out a soft sigh you looked down at your hands "Yeah, uh something happened but I hope I will just get over it soon" you mumbled.  
  
"Well, I do not believe it is my place to speak but- maybe you should not let something or anything for that matter bring you down" and he added "Especially on such day."  
  
You looked up at him with a frown and he spoke again.  
  
"It is your birthday, my princess. Your special day. And instead of being there, inside, dancing with someone you are here and crying." he said.  
  
"Well, I am not exactly crying anymore, am I?" you asked with a smirk and he chuckled slightly; you would be lying if you said you didn't feel your heart flutter at it.  
  
"Indeed you aren't" he replied "But if I may ask... are you completely sure everything is alright? I don't mean to intrude it is just out of pure concern"  
  
"Yeah it's just... things happened" you said looking down at your hands "Isn't it sad how you think you know somebody and you believe so do they but in the end you were both just wrong?" you asked looking slightly up at him.  
  
"I suppose" he gave you a small nod "Something like that happened?"  
  
You nodded at his question "Sort of. It was just-" you shook your head "-I didn't do anything wrong. At least I don't think I did. All I was trying to do was just for the best and yet... It hurts. I thought it would be for the best but it only feels as if I have torn my own heart apart with my bare hands. I just can't understand what I'm doing wrong. I try. I try really hard but I just end up hurting people. No matter what choice I make, somebody will always end up hurt." you let out a shaky sigh and bit your lip to keep the tears in.  
  
"It is not easy to make the right choice, my princess. It is actually a struggle all the time. Mostly when somebody is hurting. I really am not the best when it comes to choices but I believe that it is best to think about it more. Take your time, princess, and give the opportunity to both choices to happen. Because if you don't, then you will never know what you've opted for." he said with a small shrug and after a while of looking up at him you nodded.  
  
"I guess you're right" you gave him a small nod "Thank you..." you trailed off, frowning when you realized you had not asked his name yet.  
  
"Henry. My name is Henry" he smiled at you and so did you.  
  
"Pleasure to meet you Henry. I am (Y/n), but you obviously know that already" you said with a soft giggle and his smile only widened.  
  
"The pleasure is all mine, princess" he took your extended hand and kissed it.  
  
You bit your lip to keep your smile from getting bigger especially when you felt a tingling sensation at his lips touching your hand. You couldn't help it when your mind started wandering to how it would feel if those lips kissed yours and other parts of you.  
  
 _Whoa (Y/n) just hold it there! What?_  you thought to yourself, your eyes slightly widening at the thoughts that ran through your mind.  
  
"(Y/n)" you said softly "Just call me (Y/n) please"  
  
"(Y/n)" he said in a smooth, and with a slight accent, voice. You already loved how your name sounded coming from his lips.  
  
 _Not how it sounded when it came from Dean_ you couldn't help but think.  
  
You shook slightly your head to rid yourself of the thoughts and mentally scolded yourself for it. Even now that another man was able to attract you to this point you kept comparing him to Dean.  
  
You really needed to get him out of your mind.  
  
"You are Henry the fifth, right?" you asked him "King of England?"  
  
He nodded at your words "Indeed. You have heard about me?" he asked intrigued.  
  
"Everybody's heard about you. Everybody knows you." you stated "Besides, you fought with my father on the most recent war in France, right?" he nodded at your words "He told me a lot of things about you. He trusts you a lot"  
  
"I am glad to say he does. Just as much as I do. We have a great friendship that has lasted through the years." he said with a smile as you both had started taking a small walk through the garden, his hands were folded behind his back and yours in front of you.  
  
Some fresh air was definitely needed but talking with him was needed  _much_  more.  
  
"He has also told me a lot of things about you. He is really happy to have a daughter as you and after all this time I couldn't help but want to meet you as well. That's why I came here tonight." he said, looking down at you with a small smile.  
  
"And I have to say it was certainly worth it" you bit your lip as soon as the words left his mouth, and tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear.  
  
"Really?" you asked sheepishly looking up at him.  
  
"Oh yes. And I am most happy to say that reality far exceeds my expectations" he added with a small smirk.  
  
"And you mean?" you asked playfully, smirking at him and raising an eyebrow.  
  
He chuckled slightly as you stopped walking and stood in front of you "That your beauty far exceeds what your father had described you to be. It far exceeds what anyone could have ever prepared me for. For it is is impossible for anyone to have ever prepared me, believe me. And I assure you that it greatly exceeds my expectations. That no matter how hard I imagined you, this- what now stands in front of me is much more than what human imagination can come up with. That you, my beautiful princess- (Y/n)-" he let a soft chuckle at his small mistake "- are so much more than it is possibly imaginable. That the beauty that now stands in front of my eyes is greater than the finest pieces of art I have seen in my entire life, made by both artists and God himself." he said in a soft voice, his accent more evident now - clearly defining his origins.  
  
It was soft like velvet that you could almost reach and touch it. He spoke as if he was a great poet and at this moment you were sure you could stay and listen to him for hours to no end talk and talk about anything and anyone. Even if it was the most simple of things you were sure he was going to make it sound so great and he would surely have you captivated just like now.  
  
"A simple  _'You're beautiful'_  would have been enough" you said with a soft chuckle that soon died off as you stared up at him like you were in a daze.  
  
He chuckled as well "I suppose. Forgive me if I tired you, then. It is impossible for me not to speak as that when I gaze at you, my lady" he said apologetically.  
  
"No need to apologize, Henry." you said and he smiled at you as you both started walking again through the garden, you glancing every so often at the open ballroom's big windows.  
  
"So..." you started again, biting slightly your lip, not sure if you should ask him.  
  
"Yes?" he raised a playful eyebrow, slightly smirking at the blush that rose in your cheeks.  
  
"Are you here tonight with... someone?" you asked shyly.  
  
"If- if you don't mind my asking" you hurried to add.  
  
He chuckled at your slight nervousness and spoke "No it is quite fine. And, no, no I'm not here with someone. Unless my knights and soldiers count. Do they?"  
  
"No, no I guess they don't" you mumbled, with a small nervous chuckle, looking down at your hands.  
  
"Something the matter?" he asked and you could see the playful glint in his eyes.  
  
"I- no it's just uh-" you tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear "I was just wondering- and I don't mean to come off as rude but- how come?" you asked in a soft voice.  
  
"How come what?" he asked, a small smirk forming on his lips.  
  
 _Damn him. This man was definitely pulling on your last of strings. Did he really expect you to say it?_  
  
"H-how come you are not here with a woman? O-or is it just tonight?" you soon added a second question, your voice trembling slightly.  
  
He laughed slightly at your stuttering and you felt your blush only darken "No, no. I am not with a woman here by my side because I do not have one, whatsoever. Why are you asking though?" he glanced at you from the corner of his eye "That hard to believe?" he added when he saw your almost stunned expression.  
  
"I uh- well uhm- actually- To be honest yes. It actually is." you finally managed to stutter out "It kind of is hard to believe how a man like you does not have a wife or at least fiance by his side. I mean, any woman would certainly want to be that so, yeah I guess it is pretty hard to believe"  
  
He just nodded at your words, shrugging slightly but did not say anything for a while as you both walked through the garden. His hands folded behind his back and yours in front of you.  
  
The almost-silence did not last long, though, as a smile formed on Henry's lips and he spoke up "Would  _you_?" he raised a playful eyebrow and glanced at you, for a good while at that.  
  
You felt yours eyes widen as soon as the words left his mouth and the heat in your cheeks rise even more, your heart picked up - although it had already been beating really fast and you averted your eyes from his immediately.  
  
"I-" you could only utter as you felt a lump on your throat. You bit your lip nervously.  
  
You certainly could not deny that you were attracted to the man and right now he just was not making things easier for you.  
  
He laughed and shook his head "Just kidding" he muttered.  
  
"But- to answer your question I guess it is for the same reason you haven't, princess- I mean (Y/n)" he corrected himself "Even if it is hard in this era of marriages made out of pure convenience and of Kings and Queens marrying somebody just because they must, I believe that seeking out that true feeling of love is of outmost importance. It is what keeps us alive. Just like a horse needs water after a long and tiring day so do humans need love. True love. It is hardly possible to find that scarce feeling in our days. A feeling so strong and powerful, capable of making people do anything their hearts wish for as long as it is for it. Love. Wasting my life with somebody whom I do not have true feelings for is equal to death, my lady, and for that I shall live alone and simply wait for her."  
  
He spoke so beautifully that you really found yourself captivated by him.  
  
"There is no point in trying to get that with someone other than that special one. Blessed be those who find true love no matter what the circumstances may be." he added and looked at you.  
  
"You- you think that true love can be found only on the face of  _ **one**_  person?" you asked hesitantly, fearing to hear the answer.  
  
You luckily didn't as Henry simply smiled at you and then looked up at the starry night sky, the both of you walking in silence for a while.  
  
You were partially glad about that because you actually didn't know what you were going to do if you actually heard him say it. You were trying hard - and maybe succeeding - in getting over Dean, trying to forget everything about him although it seemed and was impossible. You were actually hoping that you would manage it at some point but deep down you knew what the truth actually was. You feared to say it- you feared to even think about it but Dean- Dean was-  
  
"Beautiful song, don't you think?" Henry asked, effectively breaking your trail of thoughts.  
  
You looked at him for a split second and then followed his gaze to the ballroom where you could hear soft music coming from.  
  
"Would you-" he said and you turned to face him "Would you like to offer me this dance?" he was bowed slightly, one hand behind his back and another one extended to you.  
  
He was serious for a while before he opened one eye and peaked up at you, a playful smile was on his lips. You could surely get used to this side of him as well.  
  
You giggled slightly and took his offered hand. A big smile spread on his lips as you both walked towards the ballroom. You entered from one of the many doors and as expected all eyes were on you again. Your father had stopped talking with Uther immediately and was now looking at you and Henry as well. A small smile was slowly forming on his lips as you saw him give you a small approving nod. You immediately understood  _why_.  
  
 _Why not?_  you thought to yourself.  
  
Henry gave your hand a small squeeze and you turned your head to look at him. A smile immediately formed on your lips as your eyes did not leave his for a split second after that. Even as you made your way to the main dancing area.  
  
A small smile graced his lips as well. While still holding your one hand he slowly brought the other one around your waist and yours rested on his chest. You felt yourself take in a small breath when he moved his hand higher and his skin came into contact with the skin of your exposed back.  
  
"Pardon me" he apologized and moved his hand a little lower.  
  
You immediately shook your head and moved his hands up higher where it previously was "No, it is perfectly fine. Just there" you murmured and saw the smile return to his lips.  
  
You both started moving to the soft music, slowly but not so much. Just enough for the both of you to enjoy it. His hand on your back created goosebumps all over your skin and you bit your lip to keep your smile from getting even bigger.  
  
You couldn't help that a small part of you, though, compared it to Dean's touch.  
  
Damn it. Why did you have to think about him even now that you were with Henry. You were really attracted to him and found yourself loving every aspect of him but Dean- Dean still kept being present in your mind.  
  
You found yourself utterly lost, completely losing track of time, as song after song played and you only danced with Henry. You were completely captivated by him as you gazed up at his eyes. You could literally get lost in them.  
  
"Are you enjoying the ball now, my princess?" he asked with a small and you gave him a small nod.  
  
"Very much so. Thank you Henry for making my night better" you mumbled.  
  
"I did nothing, (Y/n). On the contrary  _I_  thank you for offering me the time of my life" he said, voice ever-so-smooth.  
  
"It is sad that I won't be able to see you after tonight. You are going to leave, aren't you?" you asked him with a sad look on your face.  
  
"Well..." he hesitated slightly "I could always stay if you want me to, my lady... Do you?" his voice was really low, barely audible, and soft as he looked at you deeply in the eyes.  
  
"Yes" you breathed out with a smile at the prospect of getting to spend more time with him "Yes, I would very much love that"  
  
His own smile widened as he nodded at your words, his grip on you slightly tightening as he pressed you to him. No space was between you anymore.  
  
You were sure that lots of people were looking at you right now, even as you danced song after song with only him and didn't switch with another prince as expected to. And what you were most sure about was that your father was watching your every move. You didn't and couldn't see him as your eyes were locked with Henry's all the time but you were sure, just like you remembered, that he had a smile on his face at seeing you with one of his best royal  _single_  friends- and quite close to your age so that nobody would have a problem. Henry was most probably just 10 or 11 years older than you. Quite younger than your father but they got along really well so who cared?  
  
All eyes were on you, that was for sure, but you decided to ignore everybody, to clear your mind of anything and anyone - well, Dean anyway - and just focus on Henry. At least for the night. You would not pay attention to anybody else but him. You would ignore everybody but him... if it meant forgetting Dean.  
  
And that's what you did. Ignored everybody. Did not look at anybody but Henry and as a result...  
  
....missed Dean's look of hurt as he watched you dance with Henry.  
  
 _He felt a pag on his chest. His stomach suddenly dropped, it was tight like a knot and it felt impossibly heavy. His breathing became slow and deep as if he was struggling to take in air, to breath properly. His hands clenched by his sides at the unplesant -_ **totally**  unpleasant - feeling that ran through his body. He clenched his jaw tightly and pursed his lips as his eyes followed your every movement, most importantly paying attention to how close you and him were and of course not failing to notice how you would not tear your eyes from him even for a second. His brows were frowned deeply as he struggled to understand what was going on. Well, he basically did. He understood very well what was going on, it was just that there was still a small part of him- or well  **most**  of him, that didn't want to accept it. Accepting it meant that it was true, that it was happening and Dean didn't want that. His heart thudded in his chest and it felt as if it was about to jump out of it any given moment. Or well, more like the shattered pieces of his heart because he was sure there was nothing left of what it previously was there.  
  
And he watched. He watched with a look of pure emotional pain on his face. He stood there still and watched.  
  
Watch.  
  
That's  **all**  he could do.  
  
Watch as you danced your way away from him and straight into another man's arms.


	13. Chapter 13

~Next morning~  
  
A soft knock on the door of your room woke you up from your peaceful slumber. It seemed like it had been an eternity ever since you had a good night's sleep while in actual reality it was just a few days. Just like it had been a few days since you and Dean broke it off. All those days, till your birthday last night, you had been struggling to focus on anything else but him. During daytime you tried to do as many things as possible, anything that was good enough to keep your mind occupied was good enough for you as well. Because honestly that's what you wanted to do. Keep your mind and self as much occupied as possible so that you wouldn't think about Dean and all the things that had happened between the two of you.  
  
You had once run out of things to do, all preparations for your birthday ball were done, and you had immediately caught yourself thinking about Dean, your heart in the meanwhile aching like hell. And after that one time you certainly did not want to find yourself in the same situation. Sure you could not stop the thoughts or feelings whenever you saw him but at those times you could take something up and occupy yourself with whereas at nights...  
  
At nights you just had to endure the pain that losing Dean brought to you. It was one of the hardest times of your day- harder than facing him and having to pretend as if everything was alright between the two of you. At night, especially when you could not sleep, the thoughts and (above all) memories would not stop rushing back to you. Memories of beautiful moments you and Dean shared, memories of the funny moments you and him had and memories of all those loving moments that every time were so different yet, at the same time, so similar to each other. And that was just because there was that one particular feeling – among all the others Dean had managed to make you feel – that was always present. Love. Among all those other feelings, the safety of being held in his arms, the swelling of your heart whenever he smiled at you, the butterflies in your stomach whenever he laughed or even blush on your cheeks whenever he complemented you, there was love. Yes those were things that happened often but what you always knew you felt for him, whether you were at that moment in his presence or not, was love.  
  
You always knew you felt love for him- You always knew you were in love with him but just were too scared to even admit it, in fear of something happening and you in the end being forced to say goodbye to all of the things you and Dean had and felt. And you were (partially at least) right at that.  
  
But those were memories you had to forget. And as much as it hurt you had to. Even if all those thoughts of beautiful moments between you and Dean were something you wanted to cherish forever you knew you just couldn't. It was not just the pain you felt as you thought back to all those moments at nights as you laid almost numb on your bed, not having the emotional strength or courage to keep the tears from rolling down your cheeks and to the pillow. No, it was not just the pain os reminiscing those moments that were over that hurt you but it was just that fact that brought the most pain. The fact that those moments were over. Gone. Done. Finished. And were not going to happen again.  
  
Dean was not going to ever hold you in his arms like he used to, you were never going rest your head on his chest again and fall asleep to the soothing sound of his heartbeat while he ran his fingers through your hair. You were never going to be able to see that dazzling smile of his directed at you, nor would you ever get to hear him laugh for real and not pretend. You were never going to get the chance to see his freckles from upclose as he leaned his forehead on yours and you two merely gazed at each other. You were never going to get to feel his skin on yours, touching you tenderly as his lips slowly but surely came closer to yours. And then he pressed them to yours in a kiss that every time varied from slow, to soft, to hectic, passionate and sometimes full of lust. But every time managed to make you feel the exact same way. Your knees going weak, the air being knocked out of your lungs, your heart beat miles per hour and your hands shake in anticipation as you felt your stomach tighten. You were never going to feel any of that again because simply you were not going to live any of that again.  
  
And it hurt like hell.  
  
Or well,  **sort of**. More specifically speaking?  
  
It  **used**  to.  
  
It seemed to be so hard for you to explain it yet so easy at the same time. And it all started last night. Last night that you did not have to try to forget about Dean and what was happening all these days. No you didn't even in the last bit try to forget the pain. Because you just simply did not feel it anymore. The weight that seemed to be on your shoulders all the time and managed to keep you awake at nights was gone. Your heart did not feel heavy like a rock anymore, although it did hurt. Let's be honest, you were not going to get rid of all the pain so quickly and easily especially at the feelings you had (and still do) for him.  
  
You did not want to let yourself get lost in this, like you previously had done with Dean, but the more you thought about it- no, the more you thought about  _him_  the more you found your smile getting bigger. It was inevitable and you certainly could not deny it, at least to yourself, that the thought of a certain blue-eyed king had you grinning to yourself til late at night when sleep finally had enveloped you. At some point you could still hear his words echoing in your ears, his soft and accented voice seemed to be what had actually lulled you to sleep in the very end. But you clearly remember your cheeks burning hot as you merely thought of what he had told you that night and you surely could not deny that a huge grin spread on your lips as you remembered what he had said about not having a woman by his side that night- or in general.  
  
It was hard to ignore the flutter of your heart as you thought of the way he smiled at you last night or how his sky-blue eyes shone with a spark you had never seen before in anybody and certainly drew you in. Not to mention the pleasant shivers you vividly remember running down your spine as his hand came in contact with the bare part of your back. Or the way he reacted after that. He truly was a gentleman. But then he had that mischievous glint in his eyes and that smirk that only promised more to come that you could not expect. And all that was certainly something that excited you. And let's not get started with his accent. Dear lord, you thought your knees were going to give away any given second the more you heard him speak. Maybe it mostly had to do with what he was saying that it affected you so much. The way he expressed things.  
  
You still caught yourself biting your lip to keep the smile from getting bigger. If possible. Henry had you on cloud nine and acting like a lovestruck little girl in a matter of just a few hours of knowing him.  
  
 _Wait what?  
_  
No. You shook your head to dismiss the thought. You didn't know him that well, you certainly could not be feeling that way about him especially when you knew you still felt things about Dean... could you?  
  
You did not want to let yourself fall in love with him- or have any sorts of feelings anyway. Yes, your father and him were best friends and you were pretty much sure everybody would love to see the kingdom's only princess be with England's King and this only meant that nobody would raise objections but- something still did not feel right. You could not point your finger on it and- you didn't have the time to, either, as another knock on your door was heard.  
  
You let out a small groan and rubbing your eyes to get the sleep out of them you spoke “Come in”  
  
Without waiting a second, as expected, Anna along with the rest of the maids burst through the door.  
  
“Aren't you a little early today?” you asked groggily as they literally dragged you out of your bed.  
  
“Yes, but our king requested your early presence at the table. Forget not that we have guests, my princess” she said as she combed your hair.  
  
“How could I ever forget” a smile immediately spread on your lips at the thought of the British king- one you could certainly not hide even if you tried and that Anna of course took notice of.  
  
“You and King Henry seemed to be really close last night. You did not dance with anybody else but him. And you usually save one dance for prince Arthur on every birthday ball you have” she said with a small smirk. Anna was more than just a maid and you wanted to treat her as a friend, that's why she spoke more freely to you.  
  
You felt a blush creep up your cheeks as you looked down at your hands. You shrugged casually “I guess. He's just a nice man”  
  
“And certainly a handsome one” she noted and you could not help but chuckle and nod your head in agreement.  
  
“Although-” she spoke up again “-I believe Dean is far better.”  
  
“Dean?” you asked, frowning deeply.  
  
“Yes, you know your father's knight? You know he is quiet 'famous' amongst the maids. They all seem to have taken a liking to the green-eyed knight. Who wouldn't though?” she ended with a question and a chuckle.  
  
“Yeah” you breathed out in a low voice but did not say anything more and let her do her job.  
  
“With that smile-” Anna continued, it seemed that you were not done just yet “-and those eyes and that body! Oh gosh I would be willing to get thrown in the battle if it meant having him save me. And let's not forget-”  
  
“Yes Anna yes! I get it!” you snapped, effectively cutting her off “I get it” you said in a much lower and calmer voice tone. You bit the inside of your cheek, frowning at the clearly unpleasant feeling in your chest.  
  
You could not be jealous, right?  
  
“Pardon me princess” she mumbled.  
  
“No, no it's ok. I'm sorry” you gave her a reassuring smile.  
  
“Your father seems to be really happy though. I mean about you and king Henry. It is obvious that he trusts him and considers him a good friend but- it is about you and him being so close that seems to make hims even more happy. I guess it is understandable after you declined to be with prince Arthur.”  
  
You rolled your eyes “Arthur and I are merely friends, no matter how hard it seems to be for my father to understand that. As for Henry-” you let out a soft sigh “-he is merely a friend as well. For the time being at least. So my father better not start making assumptions” you said as firmly as you could. It had started to get on your nerves how your father saw every guy as a potential husband for you. You feeling things for Henry had nothing to do with it.  
  
Anna didn't say anything further, she just proceeded to do her job like the rest of the maids. Once they were sure their job was well done and that you were ready they, well mainly Anna, escorted you to the dining room- or well, she mainly tried to catch up with you as you ran towards the room where you were sure they all waited for you. And sure there they were.  
  
“Sorry” you mumbled, head slightly bowed as an eery silence surrounded you all as soon as the doors opened. All talking immediately stopped.  
  
Your father let out a sigh and although you expected a glare from him you only got a chuckle and a shake of his head.  
  
“It's alright. Come (Y/n)” he said, motioning for you to move.  
  
Although initially a little shocked you started walking and finally made your way to your arranged seat next to your father.  
  
“Overslept again (Y/n/n)?” Arthur asked with a small chuckle and you rolled your eyes at him but did not respond anyway, so of course he continued speaking “I'm guessing you staid up till late at night huh? Is there something we don't know?... Somebody maybe?” a smirk spread on his lips as soon as he noticed your eyes almost widen. Although Arthur liked to flirt with you he was at the same time like an older brother, teasing you all the time whenever he knew you liked somebody and of course getting overprotective in the end.  
  
“Arthur!” Morgana hissed at him.  
  
“Hey we're practically a family here! All I'm saying is that if there is somebody I want to know. So is there a lucky somebody whose thought kept you awake at night or what?” he grinned at you but you just glared at him.  
  
“A lucky somebody indeed. To have even a few hours of our princess' thoughts” a different voice was heard and all heads turned to look at Henry standing at the door next to... Dean?  
  
Probably he had been sent to escort him here, by your father.  
  
You averted your eyes from Dean, whose own eyes seemed to be glued to you, and looked at Henry looking at you with a soft smile.  
  
“Not just a somebody” you said with a small shrug, not taking your eyes off him, as his smile only widened. And the butterflies went crazy in your stomach.  
  
“So he must be special?” he raised an eyebrow.  
  
“He certainly is” you spoke softly and his smile turned into a smirk.  
  
“So there is somebody!” Arthur pointed out with a satisfied smile and you just rolled your eyes at him again.  
  
“Good-morning Henry” your father told his friend with a smile.  
  
“It surely is” he replied with a smile, looking at you and then back at your father “Good morning to you too as well”  
  
“Please come take a seat” your father said, motioning to the seat next to you.  
  
You could hardly keep the smile, just like Henry himself, as he slowly made his way towards you. You eyes were locked and you didn't dare- didn't want to tear yours from his.  
  
But you did for just a split second and you saw Dean walk next to him and then make his way towards your father, standing behind his seat. His eyes all the time were on you while you wanted to avoid eye-contact as much as possible. And as much surprising as it seemed you did not have to try hard because as soon as Henry sat next to you all your attention was on him.  
  
Dean swallowed the lump in his throat, his eyebrows knitting together as he felt his heart tighten in his chest in a clearly unpleasant way. He tried not to let it show, though, and as usual put on a stoic face and took his place behind your father.  
  
“You slept well?” your father asked and Henry's attention was immediately snapped away from you.  
  
“I certainly did” he smiled politely at him.  
  
“After the war in France ended then I believe everything is alright?” your father asked again.  
  
“And it is. I would have not achieved anything if it was not for you my friend”  
  
“I merely did what I had to. I was not going to let you go on your own after all”  
  
“Indeed. But the courage and will you showed at the battle was unparalleled”  
  
“I told you I fought for a purpose. The ones I love” your father said, looking at your mother and placing a hand on top of hers.  
  
“And I now understand what you meant” Henry nodded his head with a smile, turning to look at you which only made the smile get bigger and a blush creep up your cheeks.  
  
A smile crept up your father's face but he tried to cover it up.  
  
“So, Henry it is great to know that you'll be staying for longer. You don't visit us often” your mother said with a warm smile.  
  
“I know and I wish I could come more often but it is hard to leave the kingdom entirely on its own.” he said apologetically.  
  
“So you won't be staying for long?” you caught yourself asking before you could comprehend it. A frown set on your face.  
  
“Even if my kingdom does need me I can't find it upon myself to do anything different than what you wish me to. I am here upon your request and I shall not leave earlier than you want me to” he said, voice ever so soft and calm and you found your own smile getting bigger.  
  
“Oh please if it is up to (Y/n) then you better forget England whatsoever” Arthur said with a roll of his eyes, a small scoff and laugh leaving his lips.  
  
Your eyes immediately widened “Arthur!” you exclaimed, Morgana doing the same.  
  
Arthur just raised an eyebrow, looking between you and Morgana but then shook his head and proceeded to eating his food.  
  
“I'm sorry” you said in a low voice to Henry.  
  
He shook his head with a smile “It is quiet fine. Besides, I do not believe I would mind it if I was able to see your beauty every day” he said softly so that you could only hear.  
  
You looked sheepishly at your hands, a blush on your cheeks but a smile on your lips, even if you tried to keep it off by biting your lower lip. You looked shyly up at him “I would certainly not mind having you here for as long as possible” you said softly.  
  
“Then I shall” he smiled even more, putting a hand on top of yours that only made you blush more.  
  
You didn't miss to notice how his smile turned into a small smirk, but what you did miss was the smile that spread on your father's lips and...  
  
...the deep frown that set on his face as he tried to hold himself together. The pain in his chest only increased.  
  
The rest of the morning along with your breakfast went by rather smoothly, fact you were glad about. Just like you were glad about Arthur not making some comment towards Henry, either embarrassing for you or rude for Henry. At some point he had stopped being playful and making remarks or teasing you. He had just ended up straight forward glaring at Henry, especially when you seemed to show more interest in him or he would be a little more affectionate towards you.  
  
You of course didn't mind in the least bit. The feeling of his hand on top of yours, his skin in contact with yours, brought pleasant shivers down your spine. It was certainly a feeling you enjoyed and could easily get used to. It obviously was something Arthur did not like, though, as he glared daggers at the young king. And he was not the only one.  
  
You did once or twice hear a scoff when Henry said something to you but you soon came to the realization that it was not Arthur. You turned your head and caught sight of Dean's eyes being glued to Henry and as soon as he sensed your eyes on him he turned his head to look at you. His jaw was still clenched but you did not see the same emotion in his eyes as before. Although he was previously angrily glaring at Henry as soon as he looked at you, you saw the pain flash through his eyes. You saw the hurt even as he tried to mask his feelings, and you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel your own heart shatter. He only pursed his lips and visibly turned his head the other way so that he was not looking at you, his jaw even more clenched, lips pursed and a cold glare set on his face as he obviously did not want to look at you anymore.  
  
You bit your lip and looked away from him after that, your heart aching to see him so clearly ignore you. Luckily, Henry once again managed to get your attention off Dean and make you forget even for a second about him. You could not be more thankful to him about that.   
  
~~~  
  
And that is how the rest of the week went on. With you being grateful to Henry for the distraction he offered to you from all your problems and... much more.  
  
It certainly was not just a distraction and he certainly could not be described as only that. It was hard, nearly impossible for you to believe it, but every time you came face to face with Dean and his either heartbroken or emotionless look all it took was for Henry to just say a word and all your attention would once again be on him and as if by magic the pain and guilt you'd start feeling, every time, just left as he smiled at you. It was always being replaced by a warmer feeling, as if everything was alright and finally falling into place.  
  
You could not deny that every time you saw Dean you still felt your heart skip a beat, a feeling of longing to have again what you once had was always there along with the pain it brought to you to see him this way. You'd heard the maids, Anna herself even had made a mention, how he just was not his usual self and these days had only become worse. No jokes or teasing had been done by him, as he rarely would be with somebody. Whenever he did not occupy himself with too much work to the point he could barely think of anything else other than that, he'd often be on his own walking around the gardens and always thinking- although, when you had once seen him yourself, you could say that you clearly saw how he was struggling to keep himself from thinking.  
  
And the situation seemed all too familiar.  
  
At some point you had caught yourself contemplating on walking towards him and talking to him- although you had no idea what you were probably going to say. You just felt that pull towards him, to ease his pain that you felt guilty to admit was because of you. But every time you found yourself not making a single move and instead watching him from the corner of your eye as he sunk further into his pain. Every time you just turned your head away from him and were... thankful for that.  
  
You were thankful to Henry for always managing to captivate you with his words and all of your attention to be on him in an instant. You didn't know if you were a bad person for doing this to Dean- you didn't actually know how to call this but at the same time wasn't that what he had done to you not a long while ago? Well, it was not exactly this but you were the one begging him just three weeks ago to not let you, that you could work this out no matter what everybody else said and he was the one to pull away because he thought it was the right thing to do for the kingdom. You were the one just two weeks ago to be hurting like hell because of him wanting to do the right thing for your people.  
  
Well, here you were doing just that. And, if you were completely honest, it didn't feel like a chore as with the rest of the things you did as a princess. It felt like...  
  
...when you were with Dean.  
  
The thought alone scared you but at the same time you had to remind to yourself that you did not have a reason to, because Henry was not Dean in so many ways. It hurt but at the same time felt like the biggest relief knowing this and every day realizing it even more. Henry managed to make you feel so many things at the same time and just when you were feeling guilty for doing this to Dean- you'd say betraying but... you and him were not together, not anymore, so you could basically do whatever you wanted to. Just like he did- and that was something that even if you wanted to deny it made you extremely jealous- point was that, even if you did feel this bad there in an instant Henry managed to make you feel ten times better by just offering you one of his warm smiles or in general being there to listen to you. Even if he denied it, he was a great listener and always paid attention to what you told him. He always knew how to comfort you, the right things to say or the right moves to make, whether it be a hug or a hand on top of yours. And of course you always spoke in general lines to him, not daring to say the truth behind all this.  
  
How could you even say- hell, even admit to yourself that you were falling for the blue-eyed king while you still were in love with the green-eyed knight?  
  
 _How?_  
  
It was hard for you and you dreaded to even think about it. So you were once again thankful to Henry for offering you the relief you so much longed for. You did not know how he did it but with just a few words he instantly managed to make you feel better, like it was not actually your fault, but above all- he managed to take your attention away from what was really happening. To take your attention away from Dean- and, really, that seemed to be easier and easier for him with each day passing.  
  
"You're wearing the gift I brought to you" Henry had once said in almost disbelief as he glanced at you. You were taking a stroll in the woods, as usual, and your father could not join you so instead it was just you, Henry, a few soldiers and... Dean. Yeah, your father just could not trust you with any other knight but him.  
  
You and Henry were really close at that time and you could not help but notice as you walked how Dean would either glare at him or look at you with a heartbroken look on his face.  
  
"Yes, I just could not let it. It was so beautiful" you had said, your attention fully on Henry in just a split second.  
  
"It certainly cannot match your beauty, my princess" he had smiled that half smile, half smirk of his that made you weak to the knees "I tried to find the most beautiful and bright precious stone to adorn the necklace and when I did I thought it was perfect. Shining so bright like a star. Forgive me, though, for your beauty shines brighter than the sun. I shall try next year to find a better one" his words had instantly brought a blush on your cheeks and it had been really hard for you to hide it, just like the smile that was on your lips.  
  
"So you will be here till next year to wish me my Birthday?" you had asked, looking up at him with a smirk.  
  
"Do you want me to?" he had asked back just as slyly and it was impossible for you to hide your wide smile or keep yourself from giggling at him. He had once again managed to take your attention away from your problems and make you feel better in an instant, hope and true happiness filling your heart for the first time in a long while. And you were thankful to him for that.  
  
What you did not notice, though, was how the look on Dean's face got darker and the frown only deepened as he pursed his lips in a firm line. It hurt him to see you so close with Henry, it hurt him to hear you laugh or giggle and know that it was not because of him- because he could only bring you pain because of who he was. It hurt him seeing you and Henry so close just like it hurt him to see how easily you had forgotten about him. As if he did not matter- as if he never mattered. But above all it hurt him seeing you and Henry close in this kind of way, the blush on your cheeks as he complemented you or the shy smile on your lips that could only indicate one thing... you were falling in love with him.  
  
And Dean knew it. He knew it because he had once seen that kind of smile directed at him, that kind of blush rise on your cheeks because of him, but would never again happened because he had acted so stupidly and pushed you away.  
  
And it hurt him to no end. It hurt him knowing that... all of this was true. That you were indeed falling in love with another man and forgetting everything about him. Because it was not just him that had come to that realization. He was not the only one that could see it.  
  
And that could only mean it was true.  
  
~*~  
  
You saw the tall and slim figure of the British King standing with his hands folded behind his back as his eyes followed the movement of different knights fighting with each other. You had been looking for him everywhere until your father told you that he was at the training arena of the knights and soldiers (the smirk that had spread on his face you tried not to pay too much attention to as you asked him about the blue-eyed man) and so you made your way here where you finally found him.  
  
"I didn't know fighting fascinated you so much" you spoke up as you stood next to him, your hands in front of you.  
  
He smiled and turned his head to look at you now "As a King it is my right to know how to fight so that I can protect my kingdom, this does not mean I am fascinated by it. But if you wish, I could say that I try to view it as... art"  
  
"Do tell?" you raised an eyebrow, smirking just slightly. Even at the most simple question the answers he gave you, and the way he did, always managed to astound you.  
  
"If not meant for death and chaos, then yes" he shrugged his shoulders.  
  
"But as a king you are bound to fight. Most of the time at least. Right?"  
  
  
"As my father used to say, a wise king never seeks out war. But he must always be ready for it. And so I am." he gave a small shrug again "Besides, if you do think about it there is art in all of this. Like the art of archery" his gaze turned to a few knights with arrows in their hands practicing at archery.  
  
"Do you know?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at you.  
  
"What? Archery?" you laughed shaking your head "Oh no. I did try once but did not have any luck. It didn't even hit the target"  
  
"Well, you probably didn't have the right guidance. Allow me to show you" he smiled that half smile and half smirk of his that could only mean he had something else in mind and you of course could not deny his offer. You were really curious to know what it was.  
  
"Oh please, be my guest" you said with a smirk of your own that only made him laugh.  
  
"Very well then" he smirked and opened the way for you to walk first, his eyes all the time on your form; following your movement.  
  
You loved how he could sometimes be such a gentleman, talking like a poet and making you feel like the most beautiful girl on the world and in just a moment he could turn into a mischievous man that just hinted on more than he let out.  
  
You lifted your dress slightly and you both made your way through the different training parts to the archery. The few soldiers that were there moved to the side as one of them offered Henry a bow and a set of arrows and followed with the others, a good few feet away.  
  
"A demonstration first" he said, picking an arrow and turning to look at the target far away from you. You moved to the side so that you could still have a good view.  
  
You watched, mesmerized, as Henry drew the bow to his ear. The string stretching just like the muscles in his arms and the muscles in his back. He was one long line of tension just like the bow in his hands. You held your breath, the tension within you too, as he lined up the shot and took aim at the target. He teased you, holding the arrow at full extension for just a half second longer than he normally did, before letting the string fall off his fingers with what looked like effortless grace. Your breath escaped from you with a soft whoosh at the same time as the arrow hit the target with a loud twang, and he looked over at you with a grin.  
  
Damn, how could he make this look so effortless and... hot at the same time? This man was certainly taunting you.  
  
"Now" he says softly "How about you give it a try, my lady?"  
  
You swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed on your throat and nodded you head at him. You went to him willingly, and he moved you to stand in front of him, his hands gentle but firm on your waist. The fact that the dress you were wearing was nothing but a few layers of thin fabric did not help in the situation. Shivers ran down your spine as he rubbed his thumb softly on your hip. You could feel his hips behind your back, feel his breath on your neck. His chest was pressed to your back, moving with each breath. He ran his free hand down your left arm, taking your wrist gently in his fingers and guiding your hand up to grasp the limb of the bow. It’s surprisingly hard for something that is so flexible.  
  
“That’s right, my lady. Feel the bow in your hands. Feel the power of it. It’s such an elegant weapon, don’t you think?” his velvet voice whispered to you, his chest moving and you could feel it.  
  
"Indeed" it came out as breathless and weak, even if you meant for the exact opposite. But it certainly matched the state you were in- the state  _he_  had you in.  
  
"Indeed" he nodded his head, whispering in repeat, his voice much lower than before.  
  
You felt him grasp your other hand and bring it up to rest against the string “Just the fingertips, my lady. The string is delicate, and requires a…delicate touch.” _  
_  
You only nod your head, unable to utter a word. You knew it would probably come out as a stutter or squeak and you certainly did not want to make the blush on your cheeks darker by embarrassing yourself.  
  
He let go of your one hand just for a second to take hold of an arrow. He placed it on your fingers and slowly guided your hand so that you placed it by the bow. He placed the balls of your fingers against the string, his fingers resting lightly over yours, then guided you as you drew the string back. You couldn’t pull it back nearly as much as he could. But he didn’t seem to mind.  
  
“Now breathe,” he whispered in your ear. “And focus on your target.”  
  
You tried to concentrate, the blood pounding in your ears as an unwelcome distraction. Your eyes were on the target, but all of your attention was on the man behind you.  
  
“And then…” he whispered in your ear again, stroking his fingers back along the outside of your hand towards your wrist, “You just…let…go.”  
  
You let the string fall off of your fingers, and it snapped against your other wrist, the stinging's sensation traveling up your arm and down your body like lightning. You couldn't help but let out a breath.  
  
"See, not that hard" his low voice whispered to your ear, his warm breath fanning over your cheek.  
  
A smile spread on your lips when you saw the arrow hit the exact middle of the target.  
  
"Yes. I did it." you couldn't help but let out a small giggle, like an excited kid at Christmas day, especially when his slight beard brushed over your cheek giving you a tingling sensation.  
  
"Of course you did" he chuckled at your own happiness as well.  
  
"I did not doubt it for a second" he added in a low voice and before you could react you felt his lips on your cheek. Your eyes almost widened and you felt yourself jump slightly. You turned just a little so that you could look at him but you could not help the smile that got bigger on your lips, or the blush that rose on your cheeks.  
  
You let out another giggle, looking down for a second as you tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear. You looked sheepishly up at him through your eyelashes "Again?" you asked, bringing the bow higher up as if to motion to it.  
  
His smile only got wider "Absolutely" he gave a subtle nod and so did you, turning to be in your previous position as as he took hold of another arrow.  
  
Your eyes focused on the target again completely, all your attention there- well and Henry of course, but you did not pay attention to anything else but that...  
  
...therefore missing the look that flashed through Dean's eyes, who watched from afar and felt his heart break into a thousand pieces. As if it was not broken enough already. He had brought this on himself, after all.  
  
"They look great together, don't they?" a voice next to him made him tear his eyes from the scene in front of him.  
  
He looked at your father approaching him with a rather pleased smile on his face as he looked at you and Henry far away from the two of them.  
  
"Princess and King Henry?" he asked with a frown.  
  
"But of course. I don't want to rush into things but I think this is going to turn into something really good" he smiled even more "I mean, look at them. Wouldn't they make an ideal couple? Besides, what better choice for my princess than Henry? I mean a prince would be the ideal but Henry is not much older than her, he's about your age, so that's good." he nodded at his own words.  
  
"They are really close after all" he added with a smirk.  
  
Dean averted his eyes from the king next to him and turned to look at you and Henry "Yes, yes they are" he said in a low voice that cracked at the end.  
  
~Time Skip~  
  
After Henry teaching you archery and you managing to shoot an arrow on your own, you and him made a small walk through the gardens, enjoying the sunset until you finally decided it was time for you to go to your rooms. And of course he had to escort you to yours.  
  
"You don't really need to escort me to my room, Henry" you said sheepishly, playing with the flower he had offered to you earlier at the garden.  
  
 _You had decided to take him to your favorite spot at the garden, the one where you could always find peace at and relax. Especially since not many would visit it.  
  
“It is indeed really beautiful” he had said with a bright smile, looking around him and at the flowers at each of your sides.  
  
“Yes” you smiled “I actually helped pick up the flowers for this part when I was about five” you let a small giggle.  
  
“Really? Oh but I should have realized” you could not help but raise an eyebrow at his words “The flowers here manage to match your beauty. To some point at least.” his next words made the blush darker on your cheeks.  
  
“Thanks” you had said sheepishly.  
  
“And this one in particular-” he bent down, cutting a flower and then coming back close to you “I think would just fit perfectly... here” he mumbled softly, brushing a few strands of hair out of your face and behind your ear, gently tucking in the beautiful flower in your hair.  
  
His hands, though, lingered there for much longer as you both seemed to be mesmerized at looking at each other, caught in your own world._  
  
"Nonsense. Of course I do" he replied truthfully.  
  
You shrugged smiling slightly "I'm actually a little sad the day is already over. I really did enjoy it"  
  
"Time is hard to define, as is happiness but I must say that this week was he most enjoyable for me as well, (Y/n)." he smiled as well.  
  
"You'll probably have to leave soon, don't you?" you asked as you both slowly came to halt as you neared your bedroom.  
  
"I wish not to think about 'soon' as something that is going to happen in the near future. I prefer to enjoy this while it lasts, and we can always make it last more, don't we?"  
  
"Yes, yes of course" you nodded your head with a smile "Well-" you looked at the door behind you "-I guess I should say goodnight then."  
  
"And I will await the morning to see you again" he replied and you bit your lip to keep the smile from getting wider.  
  
You nodded your head and without saying anything he brought a hand up and and cupped your cheek. He slowly closed the distance and leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on your cheek. His face lingered a little more close to yours and when he pulled away his face still was a few inches away from yours. His eyes seemed to do the same as yours as he looked at your lips and you caught yourself doing the same.  
  
Before you could even realize it you felt your eyes slowly closing, his doing the same, as the distance between you seemed to lessen with each second. Before you could comprehend it your eyes were closed and... his lips pressed to yours. You instinctively brought one hand up and around his neck, one resting on his chest as his other hand moved to our waist; bringing you even closer to him, no more distance left between you anymore. Your lips moved in sink with his and you felt yourself letting out a content sigh, as pleasant shivers ran down your spine. Your eyes were closed as you let yourself get lost in the kiss. You kissed him back with just as much passion, your heart beating rapidly in your chest and-  
  
Completely unaware of Dean's filled-with-pain eyes watching you as his heart broke into a thousand pieces.


	14. Chapter 14

You let out a content sigh, for the first time in a long while feeling all the weight lift off your shoulders and as if you had not a single problem. Being in Henry's presence was the best thing that had happened to you and you could not be more happy to have him with you. He made you feel like no-one ever had and certainly not Dean.  
  
Dean. His name popped up in your mind in a split second and you actually found yourself starting to doubt everything. Everything that you felt and everything that you thought was right or wrong. Should you be thinking of him when you were kissing Henry? Should you be comparing how Dean made you feel to how Henry did? Should you be thinking of how Dean made you feel , whatsoever? Should you be thinking of how you still felt about him? Should you be thinking of Dean in the first place?  
  
Dean. Dean. Dean.  
  
His name kept being repeated in your head and you tried your hardest to block it out. You were with Henry. You were kissing Henry. Henry was kissing you. You should not be thinking of Dean and certainly should not be feeling that way- that was so similar to how you felt for Henry.  
  
Dean.  
  
 _Dean who watched with a pain-filled look on his face. He felt his heart break into a thousand pieces and just as that it was still beating, making him feel like a thousand pieces of broken glass moved inside his chest; like small stabs but on the inside, making his breathing as well hurt. His eyes moved back and forth as he tried to take in everything that was happening in front of him. He wanted to believe that none of this was true, that everything was just a dream- a nightmare like the many he had over the several days of Henry's stay in the castle. But no, this was true and it hurt even worse than what he had thought it ever would. Because this only verified it. You no longer felt anything at all for him. You had feelings for Henry and obviously wanted nothing to do with Dean.  
  
He closed his watery eyes, letting out a breath that only came out as shaky. He bit his lower lip, praying on the inside to anyone that could listen that when he opened his eyes there would be nothing in front of him, that all of this was some kind of illusion. That his mind was playing tricks on him and he was seeing what he feared the most because he could not stop thinking about it. Once again in vain. Sure as hell when he opened them he saw you and Henry still there. A pained smile formed on his lips as he heard you let out a small giggle.  
  
 **At least the one of us is happy**  he thought bitterly to himself.  
  
He looked down at his feet, lips pursed in a pain smiled. His eyes were filled with tears as he fought to keep them in. He shook his head, closing them again momentarily, one tear managing to roll down. He smiled painfully still, through the tears, and opened his eyes to look up again at the two of you. He could clearly see how much you wanted Henry now. How it was Henry, how it was always going to be Henry. Not him. Maybe never him.  
  
"At least she's happy" he whispered, voice almost inaudible. He tried to smile, at least for you but he could't help it. His smile quickly fluttered and with a last shake of his head, and glance, Dean turned his back to you- his back to the pain, and started walking away.  
  
His chest had bled a lot of times at the battles he had been in, he didn't need a deeper wound and certainly more painful one than any other before._  
  
You let out a small giggle as Henry's facial hair tickled your cheek, which of course earned a chuckle from him as well. He pulled his lips away from yours for just a split second before he reattached them to yours and he tightened his grip on your waist, bringing you even closer to him. The kiss was sweet, slow and soft. Just like Henry himself. A true gentleman, putting your needs above his and making you his main priority. His lips moved in synce with yours and it felt like they were meant to do just that. Like two puzzle pieces finally having found each other. Pleasant goosebumps rose all over your skin and you sighed in content through the kiss. This felt so good, this felt amazing in fact, it completed you, made you feel whole. Like there was nothing anymore that you needed, yet-  
  
Yet you couldn't help but feel as if something was not right. That something was missing. That even if you wanted to feel happy there was still something holding you back. That this- was just not right. And as you tried to push the thought away you found yourself thinking about it even more. You wanted to feel happy and complete, because you knew that you didn't have to worry about anything anymore, but there still was something holding you back. You did not feel complete. There was something that made this completely different but not in the good way. Not at all.  
  
"Something the matter?" Henry's worried voice snapped you from your trail of thoughts and only then did you realize how you had pulled away.  
  
"Yeah, yeah you don't have to worry yourself. I'm fine" you smiled reassuringly up at him but as it seemed he was not believing any of it, as a frown was set on his face.  
  
"If you wish to not talk about it then I won't pressure but I must know- is it because of..." he trailed off and you quickly caught what he meant to say.  
  
"No, no" you shook your head "No, Henry of course not. If anything-" you let out a small laugh, a big smile on your face that made him ease up a little bit "But, no it definitely is not you. It's just... it's me. I just need to sort some things out first. That's all." you let out a small sigh, looking dow.  
  
You certainly could not be looking in his eyes at the moment.  
  
"As you wish then" he gave you a reassuring smile. He put two fingers under your chin and lifted your head so that you were looking at him "But know that if you want to talk, I am here for you. Anything that bothers you, I am here to listen. Know that you can tell me anything"  
  
Can I? you wanted to ask but you already knew the answer.  
  
You simply couldn't and shouldn't tell him what was bothering you. How could you after all?  
  
"No, Henry no. I am fine" you gave him a reassuring but fake smile.  
  
~ Next morning ~  
  
You walked a little grumpy towards the garden where your mother was waiting for you. She had sent one of her maids to inform you that she wanted to talk with you and you couldn't be more angry for having been woken up in that way. Anna had come early as always but you had told her you were going to sleep a little more- something that of course the maid your mother sent did not know and she had just barged in and woke you up. You would have not had a problem if it was any other case but you had not gotten any sleep last night, managing to fall asleep only at the morning. You could not stop thinking about the way you had felt when Henry kissed you, nor the thoughts that had run through your mind at that specific moment. Thoughts that should have normally not crossed your mind when you were kissing Henry.  
  
Because you simply should not have been thinking of another man at that moment. You should not have been thinking of Dean.  
  
And even now you could not stop but think about it. You had began to have doubts. Both about the kiss and not. You knew that you liked it just like you knew you had feelings for Henry and that you did not regret what had happened between you but- at the same time there was that feeling, or more specifically there was not a feeling, something was missing as if something was not right, as if it was not right and you partially knew why.  
  
Because it was not Dean that you were kissing.  
  
And that only made you doubt that this was the right thing to do. You hoped that Henry was going to make you forget about Dean but you actually could not stop thinking about him. And you really shouldn't. Nor should you keep comparing them to one another and notice their differences. But above all- you should not have feelings for both of them at the same time.  
  
"You asked for me to come?" you asked as soon as you approached your mother.  
  
Upon hearing your voice she immediately turned and greeted you with a smile "Yes, yes I did. I need to talk with you" she said and gave a small nod to the maids that caught the sign and one after the other left to leave the two of you alone.  
  
"What is it mom?" you asked frowning, you had not seen this look on her face before.  
  
"(Y/n)- I wanted to talk with you first before jumping into assumptions or getting excited over nothing."  
  
"Mom what are you even talking about?" you cut her off before she could say more.  
  
She smiled even more coming close to you and putting her hands on your shoulders "Your father came last night and seemed really happy. When I asked him what was going he told me that... he saw you... and Henry... kissing. Is that true dear?"  
  
"Wh-what? When did he see us? Did he tell anybody?" knowing your father he would have made a big fuss about it for sure.  
  
"Last night. So it is true. Oh dear I am so happy about you. I am not going to think about a wedding like your father, already, but-" she started again but you cut her off before she could continue.  
  
"Whoa hold on. Wedding? Where did that come from?! Just because he saw me with Henry that way does not mean- oh gosh mom, Henry and I did kiss - and I am not going to point out how my father was there to see that - but this does not mean I am going to marry him!" you tried to keep yourself from exclaiming.  
  
"But... do you not love him?" her question caught you off guard.  
  
You really did not know how to answer to this. Did you? Did you not?  
  
"(Y/n)" she said your name in a firm yet soft voice "Do you love Henry... or is there something else that you are not telling me?... Somebody else?"  
  
You looked down at your hands for a little while, opening and closing your mouth to respond but not find the words to. What could you say? What should you say?  
  
You were about to speak but before you could manage that somebody else cut you off.  
  
He cleared his throat to gain your attention before speaking up "My Queen I apologize for interrupting but- Our King has requested your presence at the moment" Dean said, voice almost void of emotion and not once glancing at you.  
  
"Now?" your mother asked after a while, all the time Dean not taking his eyes from her. Obviously he did not want to look at you.  
  
You frowned at the mere thought of it, feeling your heart tighten in your chest.  
  
"Yes your majesty" he said, nodding his head.  
  
Your mother let out a long sigh "We will talk about this later. I really want to know the answer to that question" she said softly to you, putting on a hand on your shoulder "Better think about it, alright?" she said in a low voice, meaning for mostly you to hear.  
  
Not that you were paying much attention anyway. Your focus was on Dean who just seemed to find interest in everything- his eyes anywhere else but you. You didn't know how or why but he seemed to be trying to avoid you as much as possible and oh it did hurt.  
  
"Yeah" you whispered back, your eyes not leaving Dean.  
  
She gave you a nod as you glanced at her for a second "Alright then, let's go Dean" she said getting Dean's attention whose head immediately snapped up to your direction.  
  
He looked at you now as he meant to look at your mother. He seemed to be caught in a daze for a while, a sad expression almost on his face but he quickly managed to mask it by putting on an emotionless expression, jaw clenching and lips pursing, and quickly averting his eyes from you to look at your mother "Yes your majesty" he nodded his head and turned his back to you, moving on the front as your mother followed him.  
  
He not once turned to look at you.  
  
You swallowed the lump in your throat, a frown was set on your face as you watched him leave. There was something in his expression that made your heart ache as soon as you made eye contact even if it was for just a little while. And you couldn't help but think if he had heard something or worse... if your father had told him something. No, as much happy as your father was probably at the moment to know that you were with Henry he was surely not going to say it to everybody just like that.  
  
You tried to keep yourself from letting any of your emotions show and as a much needed distraction a voice was heard.  
  
"Good morning" Henry's voice was heard next to you and you turned to look at him immediately.  
  
"Or probably not" his smile fluttered "Darling" he said with a sigh.  
  
"No, no. Sorry, I was just deep in thought. Good morning to you too, Henry" you smiled up at him.  
  
"Are you sure?" he raised an eyebrow.  
  
You bit your lip, glancing at Dean's figure getting even more far away and then back at Henry "Yes, Henry. Don't worry yourself."  
  
He didn't seem to believe you this time either but he let it slip anyway "Then, care to join me for a walk?" he asked, motioning to his left towards the garden with the roses.  
  
"Sure" you nodded.  
  
~~~  
You wished you could say that after your talk with your mother, spending time with Henry would manage to get your mind off what she had said and above all the way Dean had acted towards you. You wished. But it didn't happen.  
  
You thought you were going to be thinking almost the whole time you were with him about the kiss and from one point of view you were but for some reason you just could not help but think about how it didn't make you feel the way you expected... the way it should. The way Dean had made you feel. Up to some point it had made you feel great but this day you just couldn't help but note all the things in it that just did not feel right.  
  
You reached only to one conclusion. It wasn't Dean that had kissed you.  
  
You hated to admit it because you did not want to feel that way anymore about him but you tried to think of the bright side of things- if you could really call it that way. And that was one reason why you felt happy to have kissed Henry. You had feelings for him and the kiss and the way it had made you feel (even if it was not to a great extent) verified it.  
  
What really made you have doubts at the moment was how that one thing you had began to love in Henry was how he managed to make you forget about all your problems and feel great just by being in his company. The walk you had taken through the gardens with him was a first sign- how you talked with him but could not keep your thoughts from drifting to everything else. You found it hard to even concentrate on him and you were glad that even if he noticed it he didn't point out. Of course he was polite and a true gentleman, always smiling whenever you had not heard what he had asked you. But above all you were glad how subtle he was about things and the kiss you had shared last night. And that was one of the things that made your doubts fade away for the moment.  
  
Henry was such an amazing man that it was impossible to not fall for him- it would be impossible to deny it as well. He was not only handsome and charming but the way he treated you made you feel things you had never felt before. It was amazing to have somebody finally show you that they were interested in you and wanted to know more of you other than the 'Princess' you were. You felt special and needed as a person and not just because you were a royalty. Henry treated you mostly as a person than just the pureblood you were and you could see how you meant a lot to him. You felt important to somebody -for who you were - and that meant a lot to you. Henry was literally perfect and you could have not asked for more but- at the same time there was something missing.  
  
That thought alone made all your focus on Henry slip away and even during dinner you could hardly concentrate on him. You tried not think of your father and what kinds of thoughts were running through his mind- especially as you saw the smile he had on his face when he looked at you and Henry sitting next to each other and occasionally talking. Just like you tried to ignore his comments and innuendos when he talked to Henry or you. Whether it would be about Henry staying a little more or you looking really happy today.  
  
Not to mention all concentration slipped away when Dean entered the dining room to tell something to your father... not once glancing your way. You could see how his posture was rigid and firm, hands almost clenched at his sides. You could not take your eyes off him, not as he talked to your father and stood there for a while to hear his order, and the second his eyes locked with yours - even if it was for a second - you could see how he was trying to mask his feelings. Although you could not pinpoint it you could see that he was trying to act brave and put on a hard facade as of a way to hide all of the things he really felt. And you didn't dare think of what that feeling possibly was. But the eye-contact once again did not last long because he immediately (like in the morning) averted his eyes away from yours and once again straight forward ignored you. It hurt, you were not going to deny it, but you tried to not let any of your feelings show and instead decided to look ahead of you and focus on something that Arthur was saying- and of course trying your best to reassure Morgana that was looking at you with a frown. Whether it would be smiling or laughing at something or eating. Anything to make them believe that you were alright with the fact that Dean seemed to hate you at the moment, like it was not killing you on the inside.  
  
Not Henry though.  
  
Despite Morgana's eyes on you almost all the time - especially as Dean was with you and you could not help but sneak glances at him (only to end up sighing and looking back at your food that kept being moved around on your plate - apetite all gone) - you tried to put on a smile and act as if everything was alright. You tried to brush her off and when she later (after dinner) tried to talk with you, you tried your best to act as if you were not living a nightmare.  
  
 _"So you are alright?" she had asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Yes, Morgana don't worry. Everything is fine"  
  
"And you are happy... with Henry?" you had not missed to notice the tone in her voice or how she had raised an eyebrow at you.  
  
You had tried your best to not let your emotions show and spoke in the most calm voice you could "Yes, yes I am" you had said, after trying to swallow the lump that had formed in your throat.  
  
But you had instantly wished you hadn't because hearing Dean clear his throat as of a way to ask you to open the way for him to walk by. The almost glare- mixed with a look of hurt- had your heart breaking into a thousand pieces.  
  
But you tried to not let it show again as in a haste you bid Morgana goodbye - coming up with an excuse - and walking away in a hurry. It was the only way to not let her realize anything. Because you knew that if she saw the look on your face she definitely would. Anybody would.  
  
Henry did._  
  
~~~  
  
A knock on your door broke your trail of thoughts and your head perked up at the sound.  
  
"Come in" you mumbled softly but audibly enough, setting the book whose first sentence you had been reading for the past two hours.  
  
"Hello" Henry's soft voice was heard as a small smile was on his lips.  
  
"Hey" you said just as softly, this time managing to put on just a small and clearly fake smile.  
  
He only let out a sigh, his eyes being cast down as he made his way to you "Forgive me if-" he hesitated, looking at you "Forgive me if this is personal. I'd like to believe we have come to be close to a personal level so that we can talk about such things but I am wrong after all" he let out a... rather sad laugh. He let out another sigh, shaking his head and running a hand down his face.  
  
It hurt you as well. Despite everything you knew you had feelings for Henry "Henry" you mumbled softly and he dared to give you a small though sad smile.  
  
"Apologies" he said coming to take a seat next to you "I just..." he let out a sigh "I wished to speak to you all day but could not find the chance or the courage to. I do not know if it is because of what happened last night- I hope not, but I would like to know what it is that bothers you."  
  
You let out a small sigh but before you could say anything, he spoke again "I know that I probably do not have the right to ask. We are not that close-"  
  
"We are" you cut him off in a soft voice "And you have the right. You've earned it Henry" you put a hand on top of his.  
  
He smiled ever so faintly, taking your hand in his and bringing it up his lips to kiss it softly "That you have no idea how happy makes me. But I want to ask you- what is it that has been troubling you all day? You didn't seem alright in the morning or the rest of the day and I could not help but think that I might have to do something with it...?" you noticed how he felt guilty about it although it was not entirely his fault.  
  
"Oh Henry, no. No of course not. It's not you and... it's not the kiss. If anything, I don't regret it in the least bit. It is just- I am so confused that I have no idea what to do. Everything has changed so suddenly and I don't know how to cope... how to feel." you said looking down.  
  
"Oh so that's it" he nodded his head, seemingly having caught to more than you intended to let out.  
  
"Well, I would wish to make this all better but... that is only up to you, dearest." this made you look up at him "Maybe you think that everything is lost, that you are lost in the darkness and the unknown but there is always a chance, a spark of light... a choice."  
  
He got up without a warning, he took your hand and placed a soft kiss on your palm "I do not wish to pressure you, to make you do things you do not want. I am happy for, even if it was for a short period of time, I got the chance to see that the beauty inside you matches that of the outside. Being in your company is the greatest treasure I have ever gained and the memories we shared shall always be with me." he smiled softly at you "It is now only up to you whether you want more or not. I will not ask you nor force you. I will be happy as long as  _you_  are happy, my love. I, for now, thank you for everything you offered me. The feelings are irreplaceable and I will cherish them forever. You can only decide whether you want more or not. I shall wait and despite everything respect your choice. Goodnight, (Y/n)" he let go of your hand and with a final, bittersweet, smile he made his way to the door. He turned one last time to glance at you, smiled ever so slightly and then opened the door to exit the room.  
  
Leaving you to your own thoughts, clouding your vision.  
  
 __ **He knew. Of course he knew.**  
  
~~~  
  
You let out another sigh. It seemed like the millionth time this day but you could not help it. You looked up at the sky to see the full moon and stars shining brightly matching the tears that threatened to spill on your cheeks. You had thought that a walk through the garden even at this time of the night would help you at least clear your mind. You had not been able to stop thinking after having talked with Henry and your head had began to hurt. At least it matched your aching heart.  
  
You felt awful. Not only guilty that you had feelings for both Dean and Henry at the same time but also that Henry had realized it. You did not want to hurt him. You under no circumstances wanted to cause pain to Henry- he simply did not deserve it. You didn't want to drag him into all this from the beginning but- you could not help the feelings you had for him either.  
  
Just like you could not help your feelings for Dean.  
  
Dean. Henry.  
  
Henry. Dean.  
  
That was the thought that had been running through your mind for the past hours and you found yourself actually getting dizzy. How could you chose? Who should you chose?  
  
You tried to think of all the things you felt for the one and then the other. You tried to think of how the one made you feel and how the other did. You tried to think of who you felt more things for- who you were in love with but only reached a dead end.  
  
"Oh gosh what am I going to do?" you mumbled running a hand through your hair.  
  
You had an idea about what you were going to do but you didn't know. Was that the right choice? What would happen next? Did you love the other most? Were you doing the right thing? What was going to happen to the other?  
  
Both of them were so close to your heart you did not want to hurt any of them but... you knew you had to.  
  
Because, as you walked through the garden wishing for some kind of sign and saw him there... you knew that your choice was the right one.  
  
Because you were in love with him in the end.  
  
"Seems like I am not the only one that cannot sleep after all" you said softly, letting out a small chuckle.  
  
You caught his attention and he quickly turned to look at you, shock almost washing over his face, but he allowed a small smile to spread as well.  
  
"Yeah I guess" he let out a small chuckle that soon died out.  
  
You only smiled softly at him and decided to gaze back at him and into his eyes. The eyes of which color you had began to love.


	15. Chapter 15

"Yeah I guess" he said with a chuckle that died off soon.  
  
"Something troubling you?" you dared ask softly.  
  
He raised one eyebrow ever so slightly but nodded his head nonetheless "You could say so" he said a little bitterly, no clear venom in his words but more of... sadness and pain.  
  
He looked exhausted, as if he was tired of trying to keep up the smile.  
  
You nodded your head a little absentminded but were able to notice how his eyes studied you- and how much he didn't want to do just that. It seemed as if he was fighting an inner battle. If he should be so open with you again or once again turned his head, look the other way and completely ignore you.  
  
The thought alone made your heart tighten. You let out a sigh in the end and spoke "And I guess I am the one to blame for that huh?" you smiled bitterly at him.  
  
He looked down at his feet and then up at you "Do you want me to say differently?" he asked and you let out another sigh.  
  
"No, no. Dean" you looked down at your hands "Besides I am the one to blame for all this"  
  
"The only one" you added in a whisper.  
  
"Don't worry, you at least have Henry to take care of you" he said a little bitterly.  
  
You noticed that there was something in his voice- other than a slight hint of jealousy that was present in his eyes ever since the first day that Henry came to the castle. There was something that could only mean...  
  
"You saw us" you breathed out in more like a statement than a question.  
  
"Yeah you were too occupied to notice anyway" he shrugged with no real emotion "Or maybe I should say too happy"  
  
"I was not" you instantly replied apologetically but sill firmly (as much as you could).  
  
"Of course" he smiled ironically, nodding his head at your words obviously not believing anything.  
  
"No. No I wasn't." you said more firmly now. You let out a big sigh and spoke again "He and I- he and I are not together"  
  
"Really? Cause it didn't seem like that to me" he was fast to point out.  
  
You looked at him with pursed lips for a little while before speaking "He and I are no longer together, if you want to hear it this way then" you couldn't help but get defensive.  
  
This did seem to get his attention, although he tried to not let it show "Wow you got bored of him already? Must be a new record for you" he said bitterly.  
  
"You don't know what you're saying" you tried to justify him, shaking your head and looking away from him.  
  
"You think so?" he raised an eyebrow at you and you only clenched your jaw.  
  
"Yes" you spoke firmly "Yes because for once in my life I am sure for one thing. I struggled to do this- I struggled so hard to make this choice and when I saw you I realized that there was not choice for me to make in the very beginning. I know I hurt you, I know I did things that hurt you but- didn't you too? Come on, Dean, be honest for once!"  
  
"Aren't I?" he got defensive as well "Have I not been? I told you- I told you I regretted everything but all you did was play it off- say that I was going to take it back again and gave me no chance. Instead you went straight ahead and found another man-" you cut him off before he could say much.  
  
"I know. I know and I clearly remember. Just like I remember pleading for you to stay so that we could talk about this because I knew how you still wanted to be with me. I remember crying and crying for nights and days to no end. I remember willing myself to do the smallest of things even if it felt like torture when I only wanted to cry. I remember wanting to tear my heart out with my own hands so that I wouldn't have to feel the way I did whenever I saw you. I remember wanting to numb the pain any way I could to the point that my father's sword seemed like the only solution. And then I remember Henry coming and suddenly making things better. I for once felt like I didn't have- I didn't want to kill myself Dean just so that I could finally not have to deal with all that pain. I remember finally being able to breath without it feeling like yet another stab. I remember finally having someone to make me feel like I was not the only one to blame because, yes, I could not stop blaming myself for it. I thought I- I had done something, maybe to scare you off, that I was going too fast or anything! I for the first time felt this way and I was unable to control it and that made me think that I was the one that had done something wrong. And I'm sorry! I'm sorry if by being with him I hurt you but- I had to- I had the need to feel as if I didn't want to die because of the pain! I for once felt good with myself!" you couldn't help yourself but want to let out all of those things.  
  
"You did back away in the end, though, didn't you?" he said obviously hurt, not only that he had caused you so much pain but also that he realized that he may have been the cause of all this.  
  
You frowned and looked at him, not being able to stop feeling guilty "Yes, yes I did" you whispered "And I thought that there was still chance for me... for us, but I was wrong after all." you took a deep breath and looked at him dead in the eyes.  
  
"I'm sorry. Maybe it is not my fault, maybe it is- maybe it's both our faults, who knows-" you let out a shaky sigh "- but I won't think about it now. I don't really have the energy to. But I do feel as if I owe you this apology. Maybe if I hadn't made that first move all that time ago, if I had managed to keep my feelings on hold, then we wouldn't have come to this. But- I'm sorry. I won't force you into more pain, don't worry. I wouldn't, either way, when you are the one that I-" you stopped yourself before you could say more. You swallowed the lump in your throat, trying to keep yourself from letting the tears roll "I guess I had not thought of this" you let out a humorless chuckle, mostly talking to yourself.  
"I guess I should better leave you on your own. I was not thinking of this when I came to talk to you but- you never know, right?" you smiled but it instantly fell "Anyway-" you cleared your throat "-It was hard to make this choice, and I was not hoping for this to happen but- I don't regret it and never will. Goodnight Dean and don't worry, you are not going to see me and Henry together again. I guess we never were in reality" you forced a smile and turned your back to him, ready to walk away.  
  
"Wha...?" Dean could only breath out, standing there still still trying to take everything in. One thing kept running through his mind but he was not entirely sure.  
  
 _ **Choice? What kind of choice were you talking about? And what did you mean to say before you cut off yourself.**_  
  
He blinked several times and as soon as he noticed how you were walking further away from him he decided to take a step, and another, and another and finally taking hold of your arm he managed to make you turn to look at him.  
  
Part of him wished he hadn't. Your eyes were glistening and he could see how you were fighting to keep the tears in. It broke him more than what you had said to him earlier.  
  
"What?" your voice was thick and laced with tears.  
  
"I-" he really didn't know what to say.  
  
And then realization downed on him.  
  
His eyes widened as he looked at you almost in disbelief, before sadness washing over him. He was angry and of course hurt, that's why he had spoken the way he had, but it hurt him even more knowing how he had made you feel this way when you were so clearly trying to tell him that....  _you were in love with **him**. And  **only** him._  
  
"Dean" your hoarse voice, and a small whimper following, soon broke his trail of thoughts and he blinked to look at you and your almost flushed face.  
  
"Please" you whispered, tugging your hand away from his grip obviously wanting to get away from him as soon as possible. And oh did that hurt even more.  
  
"Oh sweetheart" he whispered, trying not to let his voice break. He let go of your hand and brought his up to cup you face.  
  
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry" he whispered in a hoarse voice, slightly shaking his head and rubbing his thumb over your one cheek. Maybe it was his fault as well, after all.  
  
You bit your trembling lip and averted your eyes from him. You knew that if you kept looking at him you were going to break sooner or later. He rested his forehead against yours as you took in a shaky breath, your hands hanging to your sides, clenched in fists as you fought to keep the tears in.  
  
"It's not your fault" your voice was barely above a whisper but you didn't look up at him.  
  
Dean tucked a few strands of stray hair behind your ear, pulling slightly away, and with his hands he tried to tilt your head upwards so that you could look at him. And you didn't object in the least bit. You didn't have the strength to do so.  
  
"Yes it is" he said full of shame and clearly feeling hurt about it. His voice incredibly low and rough, and almost cracking at the end.  
  
You let out a breath, closing your eyes and couldn't help one tear rolling down your cheek. It only seemed to hurt him more because you heard him take in a slightly shaky breath. He shook his head slightly but did not say a word.  
  
You opened your eyes to look at him and reluctantly extended one hand to cup his cheek. He closed his eyes for a moment, letting out an involuntary sigh; as he nuzzled his face into your palm. His lower lip trembled slightly and you bit yours to keep yourself from tearing up. He slowly opened his eyes and looked deeply into yours, slightly rubbing his thumb over your cheeks as you did with him. You opened your mouth just slightly but closed it again. Not saying a word. He did the same but didn't say a word.  
  
He didn't need to, either, because after shaking his head slightly and not breaking eye-contact with you he soon started leaning in. You didn't move, not an inch and instead let him slowly close the distance, your eyes slowly closing as well.  
  
It seemed like an eternity and at the same time like a split second - you didn't know how something like that could happen - but you didn't care to think about it- because you actually could not think about anything at all. As soon as Dean's lips touched yours your mind went completely blank and all kinds of thoughts vanished from your mind, instead your body moved on its own- seemingly having a mind of its own. And this- this was exactly what had not happened with Henry the previous night. Although his kiss had made you feel great it hadn't made you feel like this.  
  
Last night even as Henry kissed you you couldn't help but think (although in the beginning a little lost in it) after a few seconds you just didn't get completely lost like now with Dean. Your mind didn't go blank - the good kind of way - and your body did not take action on its own. You had felt a tingling sensation but it could not compare to the one Dean was giving you at the moment. You had felt goosebumps and shivers form but with Dean it was so much more. With Henry it was an amazing feeling, yes, because you knew you had feelings for him (if the situation was different you'd probably have done something with him) but then there was Dean- and it was not just the fact that you had met him first but it was all the things he made you feel- so much more than Henry and anybody else ever could. And with Dean it was a feelings you simply could not describe in words.  
  
And you now realized, what was missing last night and was right there now- it was the need for more. The need to have no only his lips but all of him. All of him for you and all of you for him. Because you wanted to give him all of you. To be one with him. That's a feeling only Dean could give you. Because in reality you loved him. Dean. It was always going to be Dean. And you were his. You were always going to be his.  
  
That was missing last night but it was here now. With Dean.  
  
The kiss was slow and hesitant, as if Dean was not sure if you wanted this or not. He pulled slightly away to look at you as if asking whether that was alright or not and all you did was smile softly at him and nodded. He smiled more and cupping your face he leaned in once again and this time kissed you more passionately. The kiss was not as slow as before but still slow enough for you to be able to enjoy it. Your other hand moved to the back of his neck trying to bring him closer and you could feel him smirk into the kiss. It only made you smile as well. You did not want him to hurt anymore and you were going to do everything you could for that.  
  
He bit slightly your lower lip as if asking for entrance and you allowed him that. His tongue entered and explored your mouth. It moved in sink with yours and you found yourself digging your fingers at the back of his neck, gripping tightly and trying to bring him as close as possible. Your lungs protested for air but you did not really care. The feeling Dean was giving you right now was much better than anything else and you didn't want to let go of it. The kiss was somehow sloppy but it didn't matter to you. You kissed him back with all your passion, biting at his lower lip and earning a soft groan from him.  
  
The sound - as expected - stirred something inside you. It not only brought memories back of all those rushed and heated moments shared between you and him whenever you did not have much time and you needed to feel each other as much as possible- always in hiding - but it also brought back feelings. The heat inside you, your heart beating like crazy in your chest, your breath being knocked out of your lungs and a feeling of dizziness clouding you. It felt as if you were in a haze, not really being able to comprehend much and at the same all of your senses were so sharp and hightened. It was impossible to describe.  
  
The need for air seemed to be too much for the both of you to take this time so you both slowly- obviously not wanting to - pulled away from each other. Your eyes opened slowly, his doing the same, and immediately locked with yours. You only looked at each other for a while, not saying a word. Eyes roaming each other's features, as if trying to savor this. Your cheeks were flushed and you could see his lips were kiss swollen just like you imagined yours to be. Dean looked at you with a hungry look in his eyes, although he seemed to be trying to fight it off because it wasn't the right time- It had been too long since you had been able to do this so you could justify him. Up to a point you felt the same, but you just couldn't help a slight giggle. He looked at you with a perplexed look but a smile slowly broke on his face as well. It had been such a long time since you had the chance to actually laugh for real and see him smile like this. Honestly. Because it had been such a long time since you two had actually been together like this.  
  
He let out a small sigh and rested his forehead against yours, he opened his mouth to speak but you cut him off before he could say anything.  
  
"Don't- don't say it" you put two fingers over his lips to stop him "It is not your fault, Dean. I don't blame you. I know what I said but I didn't mean it" you let out a small sigh "It is not your fault. I could never blame you" you whispered.  
  
"Then it's not yours either" he said firmly soon followed by a small sigh "How about both our fault?" he asked with a small smirk and you couldn't help a small giggle.  
  
"I guess it's a deal then" you said with a nod and he did the same, chuckling.  
  
He got a little serious, though the smirk was still there, and leaned in again; his lips now just a few inches apart as he whispered "Just to seal the deal" he smirked a little more and you let a small giggle that made him chuckle and without a warning he crashed his lips to yours in an instant.  
  
You wrapped your arms around his neck and him around your waist, tightening his grip on your and trying to bring you as closer to him as possible. You kissed him with as much passion as you could, him only deepening the kiss even more. The kiss this time, though, did not last long as a sound caught your attention and your eyes snapped open. You immediately pulled away from him and grabbing him by his hand you pressed him against a pillar (pressing yourself closer to him) and put a finger in front of your lips to indicate for him to not say a word. The sound of footstep was heard getting closer and you peaked to see a maid walking by, soon two more following. You and Dean both held your breath as you waited for them to walk away.  
  
You let out a sigh of relief and so did Dean as soon as you made sure they were completely gone. You took a few steps back and Dean a few forward, both of you relaxing. He looked at you and you both laughed slightly. Just like the old times.  
  
"I guess it's not really safe here" he said with a small chuckle and you laughed as well.  
  
"Yeah, I guess." you said softly.  
  
"I was thinking- maybe you'd want to go to my room for a while then?" you spoke again after a while of silence.  
  
"Sure" he smiled brightly, nodding his head and you did the same.  
  
You took hold of his hand and after a small glance at your hands, Dean looked back at you and smiled widely tightening his hold on yours and you both slowly and carefully made your way to your room.  
  
~~~  
  
"Finally some peace" you let out a sigh of relief as soon as you closed the door behind you.  
  
"Seems like we're not the only ones that couldn't sleep tonight after all" you said with a chuckle, turning to look at Dean "Why couldn't you?" you asked in a softer voice, a frown set on your face. Matching the one Dean now had.  
  
  
"I think it'd be better if we didn't talk about that. Besides... you kind of know the answer." he said, obviously trying not to make a big deal of it now that everything was set between the two of you.  
  
  
That did not mean that it made things better, though. You still felt that pang in your chest so you only looked down at your feet, unable to hold his gaze because of the guilt.  
  
  
"Hey" he rough yet soft voice was heard pretty quickly. Dean put two fingers under your chin, tilting your head up so that you could look up at him.  
  
  
"I think I made it pretty obvious that I don't care about that anymore. Besides I am to blame too, so that kinda makes us even, right?" he said with a small smile, trying to lighten up the mood.  
  
  
"Yeah you did but- Dean I-" your voice was low and hoarse but you didn't manage to say much before he cut you off.  
  
  
"No hey" he protested softly, his hand cupping your cheek "I said it's ok (Y/n). I  _don't_  blame you. And I don't care about it anymore. You wanna know why?" a small smirk played on his lips at seeing your own small smile.  
  
  
"Why?"  
  
  
"I don't care about it anymore because I don't have to think about it anymore. I am here. With you. And I know how you really feel about me. And that is all that matters, princess." his smile only got bigger at seeing yours.  
  
  
"Really?" you dared to ask.  
  
  
"Really" he said in a whisper "No let's get done with all these chick-flick moments cause it's just too much for me in one night" he soon added with a fake-irritated face.  
  
  
"You just have to ruin every moment, don't you?" you groaned, glaring (playfully) at him.  
  
  
"Pff hell yeah" he said matter-of-factly.  
  
  
"You're unbelievable!" you exclaimed "We are finally having a romantic moment here after all this time of being apart and you- you just go a-and ruin it a-and laughing about it! Oh you're going to pay for this!" you rambled, fact that made Dean laugh even more- or probably it was your failed attempts to keep a straight face and look mad at him but just could not help a blush that had set on your face from his previous words.  
  
"Oh really?" he raised an amused eyebrow at you "I'd like to see you try, princess"  
  
  
  
You lifted slightly your dress as you neared him rather dangerously "Don't challenge me Winchester. I am not as fragile as you think"  
  
  
"Oh princess, by all means. I do remember. I don't think  _you_  remember how I am the one here that knows the others' weak spot, meaning yours" the smirk on his face almost made your smile flutter but you tried to keep your cool.  
  
  
"So what? You're saying that you're going to fight me back?"  
  
  
"Oh but you started this war" he said ever so simply.  
  
  
"And if I may ask, oh knight Winchester, what could that weak spot be, huh?" you tried to sound confident.  
  
  
"Don't you know?" he smirked and at that exact moment you knew what he was trying to say.  
  
  
"No Dean n-" you didn't even have time to finish your sentence before a yelp left your lips and cut you off.  
  
  
The reason? Dean closing the distance between you before you could comprehend it and lifting you and throwing you over his shoulder.  
  
  
"Dean!" you exclaimed through giggles "Put me down!" you hit his back with your fists.  
  
  
"As you wish!" he said with a mischievous tone in his voice and your eyes widened even more as before you could even realize it again Dean threw you on your bed but the worst? He started tickling your sides.  
  
“N-no Dean! No! Pl-please no stop!” you tried to say in between laughing hysterically. You were trying and kicking, wanting to get him to stop. Your laughter could hardly be contained and Dean could certainly not keep himself from laughing as well. His deep chuckle making his chest rumble.  
  
“D-DEAN!” you shrieked, kicking and hitting his back to get him to stop.  
  
He was laughing breathlessly as well, and you could not keep your laughter even as he stopped. Pulling away to look down at you. Wide smiles still spread on your faces.  
  
"Who's ruining the moment now?" he said playfully at you.  
  
  
  
You rolled your eyes with a small laugh. You shook your head and looked up at him, slowly bring one hand up to cup his cheek "I am happy to say that at least we have these moments together" you whispered.  
  
  
He didn't say anything further. He just smiled softly, cupping your hand that was on his cheek and bending down to be just a few inches away from you.  
  
  
"Oh princess" he smiled ever so faintly just like you did.  
  
  
He didn't say more and he actually didn't need to as you both leaned in and in just a split second it wasn't just your bodies flushed to each other but also your lips pressed together, like two puzzle pieces locking together.   
  
You let out a small and content sigh, your hands went around Dean's neck and you tried to bring him as close to you as possible. Dean only did the same as well, his hands that were on your waist tightened their grip and pressed you even closer to him - if possible - making you let out a small groan. The kiss was not as much sweet and slow as before. Something had stirred inside you for good and had you craving for more, making it impossible to stop yourself.  
  
You clenched your fists at the fabric of his shirt - you were glad that this time and finally for once he was not wearing his armor - and tried to bring him as close as possible. He kissed you back just like you did, none of you wanting to pull apart for even a second and although you were pretty much sure your whole face would be flushed (the lack of air attributing to that) you didn't actually care. All that mattered at that moment was Dean's lips on yours and you were just not going to pull away from him, not after all this time of not being with him in this way. You had actually missed all those heated and at the same time sweet and loving moments between you and Dean.  
  
He let out a small groan as you moved under him and you soon caught yourself letting out a gasp when he rubbed himself on you. It seemed to bring him back to reality just immediately so in an instant he pulled away from you.  
  
He looked down at you apologetically, mouth hanging open ready to apologize "I-" was the only word he managed out, his voice incredibly rough but you cut him off before he could continue.  
  
"No. No, I want this. I want you" you cupped his face "All of you" you whispered.  
  
He let out an almost inaudible breath "Are you sure?" he dared to ask.  
  
"Absolutely" you whispered, smiling softly.  
  
"Then... I promise to make this special for you" he murmured, leaning in more.  
  
He ran his thumb over your lower lip and you closed your eyes for a moment, letting out an involuntary trembling breath. You soon opened them to look up at him and now you could clearly see the the emotion that flashed before through his eyes. You felt a shiver run down your spine, goosebumps forming all over your skin as he ran his hand up your bare arm.  
  
Dean gave you a small nod, as if trying to comfort you that it was going to be alright. Not that you had any doubts, seeing as it was Dean you were there with. You smiled softly at him and without a warning he crashed his lips to yours.  
  
Your hands immediately made their way around his neck as if to try to bring him closer and kissed him with all the passion you had in you. His arms seemed to start to move a little frantically as caressed your whole body. You moved your one leg between his, earning a moan from him. You couldn't help a small giggle which only made Dean groan. He bit your lower lip a little hard, earning a groan from you as well. He licked your lower lip as if asking for entrance and you could not find yourself to deny him. You could never deny him anything. You opened your lips slightly and gave Dean the opportunity to enter his tongue into your mouth. It tasted just like you had thought it would. Your tongues moved in sync once again and you found yourself smiling at the incredible feeling. Dean started kissing you more slowly this time, trying to savor every moment of it.  
  
He didn't want to pull away from you because even as he slowly started to do just that, he peppered your lips with kisses. He quickly got rid of his shirt and undershirt, removing his lips completely from yours to get completely rid of them. You let out a shaky breath as you looked up at him. You found yourself biting your lip. You took a good few minutes to admire his well-built body, running your hand up from his chest down to his abdomen till the waistband of his pants. You tried to take in every little detail you could. You took in a few deep breaths when you realized that all this time you had been actually holding your breath. He didn't miss a beat to attach his lips to yours once again. Dean smirked as he heard you groan, mostly in pleasure. He removed his lips from yours and made his way with kisses to your neck, below your jaw, quickly finding your soft spot and smirking as he earned a moan from you.  
  
You felt his one hand move slowly but surely under and through the thin material of the dress. His fingers touching the flesh of your thigh made goosebumps form all over there and you let out another trembling breath, as in combination with his lips on your neck you felt yourself shaking. He grabbed your leg, his finger squeezing and making you let out an almost moan. He pulled it up and wrapped it around his waist, making your body curve into his.  
  
You felt your heart hammer in your chest and all breath being knocked out of your lungs as his hand didn't stop there, but moved further as it reached your butt where he gave a firm squeeze. But his hand soon left its place as they both made their way up at your dress. His fingers fumbled with the strings of it (this one luckily did not have a corset and the strings were on the front as well) so Dean didn't have to try too hard but it seemed that in all his impatience and hurry to get you out of it (you were both just as much eager) and not willingness to pull away from you even if it was to watch what he was doing, he just couldn't get it right.  
  
You let out a small giggle as he at the same time groaned in frustration. He eventually pulled away and detached his lips from your neck.  
  
"Here, let me" you whispered, undoing the small bow that held the strings together and instantly the dress became a little more lose.  
  
His hands came to fumble with yours as you both tried to undo the strings- basically to pull them away so that the dress was lose enough around you. Your heart almost leapt to your throat when you realized that it was indeed loose enough for you to pull it off. Dean moved out of the way, getting up and letting you do the same.  
  
You hesitated but in the end let go of the dress, resulting in it falling down. You got rid of your underwear at the same time, some from London that were brought to you and connected to the dress. So as it fell, they fell too and therefore left you completely naked in front of him. Although he had once seen you topless, this time it was so much more different. Not only were you completely naked in front of him but this time Dean just did not have to pretend as if he was not loving what he was seeing or that he didn't want to admire it like he was doing now but also Dean now knew that you were completely his. You belonged to him and he belonged to you and nobody was ever going to change that.  
  
"Hey" he whispered, cupping your face and making you look up at him "You're gorgeous, ok? Don't hide from me. There is no need to."  
  
You smiled softly, nodding your head as you slowly uncrossed your arms from over your chest as you tried to cover yourself up a little bit. You were not going to deny that standing in front of Dean like that made you nervous and even more self-conscious than you already were. But the way- the way he was looking at you as if you were the most divine being he had ever seen made goosebumps form all over your skin. The intensity in his eyes was impossible to describe but adoration was so much obvious. It made you feel as if you were the most beautiful woman on the Earth.  
  
"That's my girl" he smirked, his hands moving to take hold of yours as he led you back to the bed. You laid softly there and Dean slowly crawled on top of you, his eyes looking rather hungrily down at you.  
  
He hovered over you for a little while, his eyes roaming your form and you were about to cross your arms over your chest again but didn't manage to as he took firm hold of them, keeping them to your sides and without a warning he dived in an started kissing and licking all the way from your neck to your chest. He stayed a little more there, kissing and licking between your breasts, his teeth occasionally grazing over the sensitive flesh there.  
  
"Dean" you whined "Please" the heat between your legs was too much to bear, especially with his rough hands now caressing your naked body.  
  
He smirked a little but didn't do anything to give you the release you want. instead what he did was the exact opposite.  
  
He started to tease your now hard nipple making you let out a loud uncontrollable moan of excitement. As his hot skin touches yours you bit your lip to keep yourself from letting out another moan. He smiled into your chest as he moved up to suck and bite at their tenderness making your reach up and dig your hands into his hair as your body started to crave more. You started to feel a burning sensation form in your lower body as he toyed and teased your breasts.  
  
“Dean” You heard yourself call out in excitement as you started to want him inside you.  
  
This time he didn't continue your torment even more. Instead he started more licking than kissing all the way down to your stomach, his hot tongue toying with your skin as it danced across it. You clenched the silk sheets of your bed in your fists as Dean kept licking and kissing at your hips now, his teeth occasionally giving you small bites.  
  
"Dean" you groaned this time and he quickly realized what you meant.  
  
His head quickly came up so that his lips could meet yours, kissing you hungrily. Teeth grazing with each other's as he occasionally bit and licked at your own lips. You were pretty much sure you they were going to be swollen and red after this kind of kiss. They moved to your neck and your hands clenched, however you had nothing to grab to so your nails dig at the skin of his bag. You panted as you felt the hot skin of his chest being pressed to yours. Dean in the meantime worked on getting himself out of his pants.  
  
Your heart leapt to your throat as you realized that once he pulled away it meant that he had managed to rid himself of all his clothing as well and of course what's about to come. Your eyes widen as you stare momentarily at its length. As if sensing your sudden fear he lifts your head up to face his as he says.  
  
“It’s okay, we’ll take it nice and slow.” he said softly and you looked deep into his eyes.  
  
The only thing you could see was pure love and even if you wanted to worry, you just couldn't find it in you anymore at seeing how much he truly cared. You knew that he was going to take care of you. He loved you and you loved him. You truly would have no wished- or even thought of it to be any different than this and above all with anybody else but Dean.  
  
"If you want to" he added slowly and rather reluctantly, as if he didn't want to stop but wanted to do what you felt right with at the moment. Only thinking of your own well-being above his.  
  
"I do." you leaned up to peck his lips "I do" you whispered and he smiled just softly.  
  
He wrapped your legs around his waist, a feeling forming at the pit of your stomach, as he gently started to ease himself into you making a momentarily sharp intake of breath cross your lips.  
  
“You okay?” He asked eyeing you for any sign of you wanting to stop.  
  
“I’m fine, don't worry about me.” you said, voice barely above a whisper.  
  
He stopped momentarily before he smiled down at you and said “Then I’ll be as gentle as I can. Tell me if you want me to stop or- or don't feel comfortable, alright?”  
  
“I will, Dean. I will.” you whispered, running your hands over his firm muscles as if to try to soothe him down “Don't think about me” you added.  
  
His eyes looked back and forth at yours, he swallowed hard before speaking “This- this is your first time. I want- I need to make it special for you” he whispered.  
  
You smiled softly at him “It already is” you whispered back, leaning up to kiss him softly on the lips.  
  
He smiled fondly at you as well and spoke “Whenever you're ready”  
  
You looked at him for a while, not doing anything but in the end smiled reassuringly and gave him a nod as if to try to tell him that you were ready and he placed himself between your legs. He slowly started to move his hips back and forth, moving and out of you slowly yet pleasurably. Your nails dug into his back, and you bit your lips hard to keep yourself from letting out a loud moan.  
  
It does slip your lips though as you find yourself unable to hold it anymore as Dean thrust into you harder. You threw your head back, your fingers scratching down the skin of Dean's back. For a little while his pace was fast as he moved inside you but he soon resumed into a slow and steady pace, making it feel so good that it was impossible to keep yourself from screaming his name. It felt as if your bodies were moving in sync, desperate and needy groans falling from your lips as he slammed into you over and over. At moments it felt hard but then it was so tender and caring, it was impossible to explain. Both of you were breathing hard as you moved together, pushing, pulling, thrusting.  
  
"Dean" you panted, almost about to scream "I- I'm about to-" a moan kept you from finished your sentence.  
  
"M-Me too" he said just as breathlessly, his face buried at the crook of your neck, as your arms were wrapped around his neck.  
  
"P-Please I- I need-" yet another loud moan prevented you from completing your sentence.  
  
"Yes, baby, yes. All for you. All yours" he panted, feeling (just like you) himself come.  
  
"Damn you feel so good" he groaned, mostly talking to himself as he pushed himself more into you.  
  
"Dean- Dean I- I lo-" you wanted to say more, you wanted to finish that one sentence but with a final hard thrust you felt yourself reach your climax and instead a scream, mix of moan as well, left your lips; Dean doing the exact same. He was patient with you, leading you and teaching you. He was more than gentle, even when his climax was close, he kept his thrusts careful and easy, burying himself deep inside you, gasping as he came.  
  
Your eyes opened (not having realized when you had shut them tightly closed) and it felt as if you could see stars. You panted, taking in deep breaths, just as Dean did the same. He pulled out of you and you let out a small breath at that. He rolled over, pulling the silk sheets over the both of you, exhaustion having caught up with him more than you. You couldn't blame him.  
  
He sunk to the bed, lying sprawled out, half on you, half on it. He slid his hand down your arm, taking your hand in his. He put it to his mouth and kissed the back of it. You couldn't help, and actually didn't want to, a smile from spreading on your lips. His chest moved up and down as he breathed in deeply, trying to suck in as much air as possible. He ran his hand over your arm and up to your neck and cheek to cup your face. He rubbed his thumb over it, leaning in for just a little while to kiss your forehead; his lips lingering there as you both sucked in a deep breath, eyes closed.  
  
“Was this ok?” he asked reluctantly, his voice a little raspy.  
  
“It was perfect” you whispered, eyes still closed and a blissful smile on your lips.  
  
He pulled away and you opened your eyes to look at him.  
  
“Really?” you could see the doubt in his eyes “I mean, it was your first time and I- I didn't want to- to ruin this for you.”  
  
“Oh Dean” you brought your hand up to cup his cheek “You didn't. Of course you didn't. You- you have no idea how great you made me feel. I honestly could not have this any different- And certainly with nobody else but you” you breathed out.  
  
He let out, what seemed like, a small sigh of relief and smiled widely at you “Then I'm glad I could make this good for you”  
  
“You made it great.  _You_  were great.” you emphasized.  
  
“No, no  _you_  were great” he insisted and you let out a small and somehow tired giggle.  
  
You smiled tiredly up at him and moved, just like he did, so that your feet were tangled, his arms around you and your rested on his chest just like your head.  
  
For a while you both stayed like that, not saying anything. Just in comfortable silence, letting the bliss set in inside the both of, fact proven by the smiles that were just impossible to be wiped out of your lips. Your eyes were half open and half closed, occasionally dropping to closed but you'd soon open them again slowly as you started to feel more tired. Although you could feel your hear beating rapidly with adrenaline in your chest just a few minutes ago, it now started to go back to its normal pace as you found yourself being lulled to sleep at hearing Dean's soothing heartbeat.  
  
“Goodnight sweetheart” you faintly heard Dean's voice say, as you felt his lips being pressed at the top of your head; his arms tightening their hold on you.  
  
You let out a small and content sigh at the comfortable feeling, and snuggled even more to him “Goodnight Dean” you whispered and before you could realize it you found yourself drifting away and sleep enveloping you, the smile not leaving your lips for a split second as you buried your face in Dean's bare chest, breathing in his scent; mixed now with yours. Fact that made the smile get even bigger as you realized that that's how you smelled as well. How you had a small hint of Dean's scent on you and he had yours. That being something that was not going to change because you were bound anymore, you belonged to each other and nobody was going to change that.  
  
Ever.  
  
~ Next morning ~  
  
A sigh left your lips as you felt yourself being pulled out of your peaceful sleep. You groaned a little bit when you felt the light hit your face. You squinted your eyes and although you didn't want to, you slowly started to open them. You groaned again at the bright light but after a while managed to adjust a little bit. Your eyes moved around the room as you scanned the area. You noticed your dress laying on the floor next to another pair of clothes and-  
  
And a smile started to form on your lips as memories of last night started rushing back to you. You bit your lip to prevent it from getting bigger but you really couldn't help it either. You looked down at yourself and although you were covered, you noticed a hand drapped over your waist, having a tight hold on you, with your back pressed to an obviously bare chest.  
  
You started moving, slowly and carefully so as not wake him up, and turned side so that you were now facing him. It was not only because you did not want to wake him up but also because of the sore feeling you had all over your body. Dean let out a small groan of protest, tightening his hold on you and grumbling some incoherent things under his breath that you didn't really catch. You giggled slightly, not being able to help the warm feeling inside your chest. You ran a hand over his firm chest and then his strong arms.  
  
You snuggled closer to him, Dean's hold on you tightening even more which made a smirk spread on your lips. You leaned in and pressed your lips to his chest, glancing up at him to see a small smile itching on his lips. You smirked even more and pressed your lips to his chest in another kiss. And another. And another. And another. You started peppering kisses up his chest, his neck, his jawline and under it where you started licking and sucking.  
  
Dean's chest rumbled in a rather purr-like sound “Mhm good-morning to you too” his voice was rough and laced with sleep but you could hear the smile in it as well.  
  
“Mhm” you hummed back as well “Morning” you kissed him one more time and moved so that you were now kissing and licking the other side of his neck, your body half on top of him now.  
  
Dean let out a small moan “Seems like somebody's in for a morning round, huh?” his voice was more rough now.  
  
You hummed “Maybe?” you mumbled in between licks and kisses.  
  
Dean let out a deep growl, his tight on your hips tightening “Fucking tease” he said.  
  
You smirked pulling away to look down at him “What can I say. I learn from the best” you shrugged.  
  
Dean visibly rolled his eyes at you but you could see a smirk play on his lips. He pretended to glare at you but couldn't help the soft smile, and he reached up with his one hand to cup your face. He made you lean down again so that he could press his lips to yours in a soft kiss; his lips moving in sync with yours like they were always meant to do just that. The kiss did not last long of course but it was so sweet that you didn't need any more proof to know what he wanted to show and say next.  
  
Or well, basically meant to say but was cut off by himself. His eyes as they moved, looking at you, glanced for a split second elsewhere and in an instead widened. His body stiffened and his arms wrapped around you protectively. You frowned at his weird behavior but soon realization downed on you as, although you didn't want to (actually feared) you turned your head slowly and looked at the doorway. A gasp left your mouth as you recoiled, sinking further into Dean's arm and tightening the silk sheets around you protectively. It certainly was not what you expected and it definitely was much worse than you thought it would be- and it could ever actually be.  
  
“Dad?”


	16. Chapter 16

“Dad?”  
  
Your breath hitched on your throat and your blood ran cold. You stared with wide eyes at your father standing on the doorway, his face emotionless his eyes glaring coldly at Dean. You noticed Anna standing there behind your father, shocked, looking with wide eyes and a hand drapped over her mouth. You swallowed thickly, worry and fear settling in more than ever before. You recoiled at seeing the look on your father’s face at the moment and Dean’s hold around your waist and shoulders tightened as his chest puffed out protectively. You looked up at him, brows frowned in worry as you saw the stoic look on his face. His jaw was clenched as he looked back at your father with dead serious expression.  
  
“Dad, plea-” you started speaking, turning your head to look at him but immediately stopped, your eyes widened at the pointed glare he shoot you. Dean’s arm on your waist tightened protectively but you couldn’t take your eyes off your father.  
  
“Get dressed. I will wait for you at the throne room. Alone.” he seemed to growl every word he said and with each one you felt your fear growing even bigger.  
  
“Da-” you couldn’t even complete that one word as your father once again cut you off.  
  
“Now!” he all-but-roared at you and you found yourself letting out an involuntary whimper, making Dean stiffen even more; his eyes narrowing dangerously at your father.  
  
You put a hand on his chest to push him back just slightly and although he didn’t take for a second his eyes from your father, he relaxed just a little bit for your sake.  
  
You gave him a small nod and after a few seconds of purely glaring at you- or more specifically Dean he turned and furiously exited the room slamming the door behind him. You slowly turned your head to look at Dean, fear and worry clearly evident. He cupped your face and rubbed his thumb over your cheek. His eyes looked back and forth between yours and he gave you a small nod as if trying to give you some courage. You took in a shaky breath and nodded as well.  
  
Whatever was to come, should come.  
  
Neither you nor Dean said anything as you got up and out of bed, picking up the clothes from last night and getting dressed in silence. You would occasionally glance at Dean whose jaw was clenched the entire time he put his clothes on. His brows were frowned and you could clearly see how he was deep in thought and it made you worry even more. You swallowed, trying to keep the tears in. You were scared, you would confess to that, but what you were most scared about was Dean and what would happen with him. You could see how in his silent and dead serious state he seemed to prepare himself for the worst. You would have said death, just like he did with every other battle, but just the thought of that word made you shake to the core that you just didn’t dare to connect it to Dean.  
  
You took one deep breath and looked Dean fully in the eyes, giving him a nod as if to signal that you were ready. You followed him to the door. You put a hand on the door handle but before you could turn it to open the door Dean put a hand on top of yours. You turned your head to look up at him, brows still frowned in worry as your lower lip slowly trembled. He moved his other hand to cup your face. His eyes looked back and forth between yours and in just an instant he crashed his lips to yours.  
  
You took in a sharp breath but tried to savior it as much as you could. You kissed him back with as much love as you could master at that moment. You really wanted to stay like this for much longer but you knew you didn’t have time. Dean started to pull away after a little while and although you didn’t want to, you started doing the same.  
  
You let out a trembling breath as Dean rested his forehead against yours. You slowly opened your eyes to look up at him and took in a deep breath, willing yourself to be strong for him… to be strong for the both of you.  
  
“Come on” he whispered, giving you a small nod and smile as if to reassure you and you straightened your back to open the door and face what you feared most.  
  
As you opened the door you surely did not come face to face with what you expected- or more specifically you came face to face with what you were more scared of.  
  
“What…?” you breathed out as you looked at the three soldiers waiting right there for you.  
  
“The King ordered for you to follow us” one of them said in a deep and stern voice, looking at Dean with a dead serious expression.  
  
“What?!” your eyes widened, as you jumped “No! No!” you were ready to move in front of Dean protectively but he put a hand in front of you to stop you. He looked at you with a dead serious expression and you couldn’t help the frown.  
  
“No, Dean no” you whispered to him in a trembling voice, taking hold of his arm as if to hold him back from following them.  
  
You feared what would happen if he did.  
  
“It’s ok” he whispered back, his voice rough “I’m going to be ok. You go to him.” he was obviously trying to be brave for you, but you could see the slightest hint of fear in his eyes.  
  
You swallowed hard, giving him a small and reluctant nod. He gave you a small smile as if to reassure you but you could see how he was pretending. It was obvious how he tried to reassure his own self that everything was going to be ok because deep down he knew, just like you did, that not everything was going to be alright.  
  
You let out a shaky sigh and shaking your head you threw your arms over his neck and hugged him as tightly as you could. You buried your face in his chest and shut your eyes tightly, and Dean was quick to wrap his arms firmly around you; burying his own face at the crook of your neck.  
  
“It’s ok. It’s going to be ok.” he murmured to you but you refused to believe him this time. You shook your head, tightening your hold on him just like he did on you.  
  
The moment did not last long though as you and Dean were both pulled away by the soldiers “No” you breathed out as two of them pulled him further away from you, the third holding you back by your arms.  
  
“No, Dean no!” you struggled to get away from his grasp, groaning when he tightened his grip a little painfully on your arm.  
  
Dean himself glared at the soldier that had a hold on you. He looked with a cold expression at the one that kept shoving him to move but before he could turn he looked at you, trying to give you a small smile that could only mean that this was it. He was just going to accept his fate. Whatever that was.  
  
“No” you breathed out, voice barely above a whisper as you looked at Dean.  
  
He shook his head at you, as you still kept trying and turned his head to give a nod at one of the soldiers and the three of them turned so that they could walk away. You watched with wide eyes, your heart hammering in your chest.  
  
“No” you kept murmuring to yourself, tears filling at the edges of your eyes. You did not longer have the strength to fight against the soldier to let you go.  
  
“No, no, no, no” you kept shaking your head, only watching as Dean was being shoved away from you.  
  
“Dean” you breathed out shakily, clenching your jaw to keep yourself from tearing up.  
  
“Dean!” you screamed so that he could hear you.  
  
He obviously did, stopping on his tracks to turn and look at you. You opened your mouth to speak but nothing came out, your voice being stuck on your throat. Dean smiled, although bitterly, nonetheless. As if he had realized what you were trying and wanted to say but couldn’t. He nodded his head at you and mouthed what seemed like ‘I know’ before turning and continuing his way.  
  
When he was completely gone, and out of eyesight, you let out a trembling breath. You felt your knees about to give away any given moment but you willed yourself to be strong. This time it was you that were going to fight to protect Dean and for what you and him had. You took in a deep breath and straightened your posture. You were not going to let this just pass by.  
  
You snapped your hand away from the soldier’s grasp. You turned to look at him with a cold and harsh glare “Take me to my father” you almost hissed the words.  
  
You needed and were definitely going to have a talk with him.  
  
~*~  
  
You walked through that hallways that lead to your father’s room with a serious expression. Your jaw was clenched as your fists by your sides. You had told the soldier that was previously with you to let you go on your own and although he seemed reluctant, obviously your father had ordered him differently, you had decided to command him to do so. You never were this way with anyone, using the power you had as a princess, but your father had pulled the last straw.  
  
You were ready to burst through the doors but a voice made you stop dead on your tracks  
“(Y/n)?”  
  
You turned your head to look at the one person you really couldn’t face at the moment.  
  
“Henry” you breathed out, able to calm down just a little bit. He was not the one that you were angry at, after all.  
  
“What happened?” he took a few steps closer to you “I wanted to speak to your father about something this morning but he wasn’t willing to. He seemed rather… angry?” it came out as more of a question and you didn’t dare look up at him, your eyes cast down to the floor.  
  
“Yeah uh about that-” you cleared your throat, avoiding eye contact with Henry at any cost.  
  
“Oh no, he didn't” he breathed out and biting your lip you dared to look at him “How? How did he find out about you and Dean?”  
  
“He- he came this morning at my room and- Dean was there and-”  
  
“Oh God” he breathed out, running a hand down his face “You know this will probably not have a good ending for him, right?”  
  
You let out a shaky breath, nodding your head “That’s what I am most scared of. And I want to talk to him to-”  
  
“No” he cut you off “No you must not speak to him about it” he spoke firmly and you couldn’t help the thought of him maybe wanting all of this to happen so that you would be with Dean but-  
“Not alone. You must not speak to him alone. I shall come with you and try to help you change his mind” he said seriously, putting a hand on your shoulder and then turning to the door; ready to open it.  
  
You stopped him before he could and he turned to look at you looking at him with a deep frown “Why-” you swallowed “Why are you doing this?”  
  
“Pardon me?” he asked with a frown.  
  
“I- I mean I- I basically chose Dean over you” your voice was barely above a whisper “Shouldn’t you be happy if I longer was with him? There would be a chance for you then.”  
  
“I would be happy if you chose me over him, I am going to confess to that. Just as I am going to be happy if you are with him and feel happy yourself, but under no circumstances would I be happy if you were forced to chose me because Dean would be… dead.” the last word he said shook you to the core. You knew that the possibilities were really high but till now you had chosen not to think about it.  
  
“Which is not happening because you and I will talk to your father right now” he added quickly with a reassuring smile.  
  
“Henry” your voice stopped him again before he could open the door “Thank you”  
  
He smiled ever so softly “You do not have to thank me, (Y/n). Nor do you need to feel grateful to me. I told you last night that I was going to accept your choice no matter what that was. I merely wish for you to be happy and if this is the way to it, then I will do anything I can to help in it”  
“I just- I wish things were different. I never meant to hurt you” you looked down at your hands, feeling guilty.  
  
“I know. But it is not your fault, I do not blame you. I told you that even if I was not the one you choose I still am content with the fact that I got the chance to spend this short amount of time with you. The memories are irreplaceable and for that I am thankful to you.” he smiled softly “Helping you talk to your father is just a way for me to to offer you something that will make you remember me”  
  
“You’ve offered me so much more than you know, Henry. So much more” you could not help but jump and wrap your arms around him, your face buried in his chest. He was quick to hug you back, his arms wrapped around you ad his face buried in your hair. Even if he denied it you could still realize, now that he hugged you, how he was hurting. Because he realized that he was never going to have the chance to hold you like this again, or more for that matter.  
  
You wished things were different but you knew at the same time that they just couldn’t.  
  
“Alright, let’s go now. Let me speak first and above all try not to let him get to you” he spoke softly yet firmly as soon as you pulled away.  
  
“I’ll try” you said and he let out a small sigh, knowing that it was probably not going to happen.  
You both turned to the door, straightening your backs as Henry pushed open the door, both of you walking in to see your father pacing around the room. As soon as he noticed your presence in the room his pacing came to a halt and he turned his head to look at you with a cold look. And you could not help yourself from glaring at him.  
  
“I think I made it clear I wanted to talk with you alone” he tried to act calm and not let anything show. After all, as far as he knew, Henry was completely clueless to what was happening with you and Dean.  
  
You opened your mouth, ready to retort but were cut short by Henry putting a hand on your shoulder, giving you a look before stepping in front of you and speaking himself “We know- she knows. But it is me that insisted to talk with you first. Do not take your anger out on her. Please.” he spoke in such a calm voice but it didn’t seem to make your father less angry.  
  
“As much as I do not wish to fight with you Henry, I am going to make this clear. I want you to stay out of this and for the sake of our friendship donot question me further.” the tone in his voice made you clench your jaw “So now, please, if you’d be so kind leave me and (Y/n) alone to talk this matter out. It is for the best, trust me.”  
  
Henry seemed to be thinking over his words, anybody would have at hearing the way your father said it, but he didn’t listen nonetheless. He turned to look at you for a little while, a frown set on his face, but then turned to look again at your father taking in a deep breath and speaking up.  
  
“Are you? I mean, I do not wish to be disrespectful for I know you, (y/f/n), but are _you_? You and (Y/n)? Or is it going to be just you talking and her having to listen?” you had to keep yourself from letting your eyes widen. Nobody dared to speak to your father this way, nor you, maybe you thought your mother sometimes did but certainly nobody else. And now hearing Henry say this was certainly a surprise. Maybe, though, this was the way they interacted after all. They were friends for so long.  
  
“Excuse me?” your father narrowed his eyes at him, although it didn’t seem to be exactly because of the way Henry had spoken but what he had said “And what is this exactly supposed to mean? Because it seems as if you know more than you should”  
  
Henry took in a deep breath “That is not what I’m saying, (y/f/n). All I am suggesting is you listen to me first before rushing to make a decision.” he spoke as calmly as he could.  
  
“About what matter exactly?!” your father snapped “Henry, look at me and tell me the truth.” he gritted his teeth.  
  
He let out a sigh but spoke nonetheless “About Dean.” and it was hard not to notice your father’s expression “What you are probably about to do is wrong, (y/f/n), and you must think about it again.” he said firmly and reasonably “It is a human life we are talking here about. Not to mention the fact that he is one of your most trusted knights- if not the only one. I was with you in the war in France and could see that myself. Please just think about it. I know it may be considered wrong but this is not such a simple matter.”  
  
“You… knew about this… all along?” your father breathed out in disbelief “You knew everything, all this time and did not say a single word? You knew about it and now come and tell me to think about it when you decided to help them? I wanted to keep you out of this conversation for your own good while you- you helped to cover up this- this-” he was trying to find the right word until your could not take it anymore and spoke up.  
  
“What huh? What is it? Crime? Are you going to call this a crime?!” your anger was too much to contain as you pushed Henry out of the way and stumped your way towards your father “So- so what if he knew about me and Dean all this time? What if everybody knew as well? Hell I don’t understand what your fucking problem is anymore!” you couldn’t keep yourself from shouting.  
  
“That’s exactly what my problem is!” he shouted back “Look at you!” he motioned at you “Hear at what you’re saying! Just a while of being with him and you do and say unthinkable things! Things you never would!”  
  
“No” you shook your head “No it’s not that. It’s not that and you know it as well! It’s the fact that you wouldn’t stand the thought of your one and only daughter- the one and only princess being with someone of a lower hierarchy. Because you couldn’t stand the thought of your little daughter being with a man like Dean, in that way for that matter! Because you couldn’t even stand the thought of the image of me and Dean being together, that close! The way you saw us this morning! Because if it was any different you’d probably tell me to stop it, thinking that I was probably toying with him and having my fun- well, I’m not! So sorry to ruin it to you but that’s the case! And I know why this is all happening- because no matter how much you claim to love me and care for me and my happiness you’d never stand the thought of someone like Dean being by my side, sitting on the throne in a few years!”  
  
“(Y/n)” Henry’s soft voice, putting a hand on your shoulder and trying to calm you down did not seem to do much.  
  
“No!” you shook him off “No, Henry, no. It is nothing else that he cares about but of his own self and only this kingdom!”  
  
“Do I?” your father’s voice made your head snap to his direction “You have no idea, (Y/n). If I actually did what was right and expected then you’d be married to someone you didn’t even know by now. I cared about you just like I still do and that’s why I never forced you about that matter. I wanted you to be happy and in love with the man you were going to marry and whom would rule this kingdom with you but this-  _this_  is beyond what I along with the rest of the kingdom can and will ever accept!”  
  
“Of course” you scoffed “Because it is all about them. Because the only way for the kingdom to be prosperous is for me to marry a fucking prince! Cause nobody else will do and certainly not Dean that happens to know all of their problems and obviously more to what they really need!” you could not help the sarcasm in your voice.  
  
“Yes! Because he is out of the question. I asked you to come here to talk (Y/n) because I wanted to hear you say you’re sorry-” you cut him off before he could continue.  
  
“Sorry? That I’m sorry? About what?!”  
  
“Everything! Everything that you did! That you were being the irrational young woman you are and that you were not thinking straight. That it is not going to continue any further but-” he let out a sigh to relax a little bit from shouting “As it seems that is not happening now, or ever for that matter-”  
  
You couldn’t help but speak up again “Damn straight” you growled “I am not going to apologize for something I do not regret in the least bit. Not now or ever. You may be my father and king of this place but you are not going to decide what I am going to do and in this situation certainly not what is wrong and what is right. I know what I wanted and no matter what you say I am not going to change my mind.”  
  
You straightened your back and looked him cold in the eyes “You may rule this kingdom but I am not going to let you rule my life. I have listened to you all my life but this time I’m not and if you do something- anything to Dean know that I am not going to let this pass by. You may be the king but I am the princess here and if my word matters in the least bit then be sure I am going to take advantage of that.” you said as firmly as you could.  
  
He looked at you cold in the eyes as well before speaking “Yes, yes you are the princess of this kingdom just as I am the king. But as long as I am alive I am the one that’s going to be making the decisions. And now I have made mine. If you are not willing to see the wrong you did and what is really the right choice for everyone then… I will.” he let out a breath.  
  
“I know that I’ve always been a good father- or at least tried to. And never denied you anything. I always wanted you to be happy the way you wanted to. But I always made sure it was the right way. This time, though, it is not only your happiness that matters. It is an entire kingdom and as much as I feel sorry to tell you… I am not going to be taking your happiness in consideration. If I could ever consider it that. You may not see thatright now and I know you’ll thank me in the future for doing this even if… you might hate me for it now.” his last words shook you to the core. Your heart started to hammer in the most unpleasant way and you literally found yourself running out of breath.  
  
“I speak not as a father but as a king now. My decision has been made.” his voice took on a cold tone, the one he had when he had to judge someone “Dean Winchester is going to be executed the soonest possible for committing treason, against the kingdom and against his title as a knight of the royal family and king himself, and going against the law and being romantically involved with the princess.”  
  
“No” you could only breath out.  
  
“No, (y/f/n) please you must think about it again” Henry spoke as calmly as he could but you could hear a tremble in his voice, as much as you could comprehend in the state you were.  
  
“No” you felt your throat closing “No you won’t!”  
  
Your father turned to look at you with a firm look, although you could see a small hint of regret- probably he was feeling sorry for doing this to you, of course Dean as well because he had known him for almost his whole life- but he was doing a well damn job at hiding it.  
  
“Yes, and you are not going to be able to do anything about that. I have made my decision (Y/n).” the calm in his voice made the panic inside you rise all the more.  
  
“No!” you heard yourself scream “No! No! No! You are not! I am not going to let you!” you found yourself advancing towards him, only to bestopped by Henry taking hold of your arms and waist and keeping you back.  
  
“Yes, yes I am. I feel sorry to tell you, and it saddens me as well but Dean has committed a… crime and he shall pay for that as much as I-” he didn’t have time to complete his sentence.  
  
“No!” it was a mix of a growl and scream, coming from you “No you’re not! You’re not sorry! You’re not even in the least bit sorry! If you could you-you’d make me watch as you cut out his head a-and if possible me be the one to hold the sword!” you faught to keep the tears in, your eyes glistening, but not wanting to show the least bit of weakness to your father. The anger far surpassed the pain, and as you clenched your fists you couldn’t help but grit your teeth as well.  
  
Your father let out a sigh that could be interpreted as a little sad “No. No I would never wish that for you. Even if I think this was wrong- because it is, I will not allow for you to hurt further. And that is why-” he let out a small sigh “You are not allowed to exit your room till this is over and done with”  
  
“What?” you breathed out, your eyes widening as you knew very well what this meant “No!” you screamed “No, you are not going to do this to me! You  _can’t_  do this to me!” you struggled slightly against Henry’s grip on you.  
  
“Yes, as a matter of fact I am. I am sorry, know I do not wish this but I have no other choice.” his calm voice scared you even more, making your heart want to break out of your chest “Guards!” he shouted and just a few seconds later two of them burst through the door.  
  
“No” you breathed out in a barely audible voice, looking back and forth between them and your father.  
  
“Take the princess to her room and don’t let her out no matter what.” he said in a booming voice and your eyes widened even more as they approached you.  
  
You back away along with Henry but they caught up with you and despite your struggles they took hold of your arms and all-but-dragged you with you screaming “No!” constantly.  
  
“(Y/f/n) please just think about it again! This is irrational!” you could hear, in between your screaming, Henry still trying to reason with him.  
  
“No, I have made my decision and it is final. Dean will die next morning the first thing and no-one, (Y/n) on top of all, will be able or there to stop it!”  
  
Those were the last words you heard as you were dragged and pushed away from the throne room, no voice anymore to scream for either him to hear or them to stop. There was no point in doing anything anymore.  
  
And it felt like there was no point in doing anything at all anymore. Not living your life.  
  
You laid on your side of the bed, now, looking at the wall opposite with a blank face. Void of any emotion like your own soul. Feeling things hurt more than not feeling them. Because that was exactly the only thing you could feel as you thought of what was going to happen next. You had been crying and banging at the door with your fists, screaming for them to open it and let you go see Dean but of course they had not listened. Your throat hurt at this point and if you were to utter a word it would be only 'Please’ at nobody in particular, wanting only to be let free to see him. It was almost noon at this point, with the sun not being on the sky anymore and just like the stars shining so were your eyes. With tears, though.  
  
You had been crying ever since the morning and although you thought you were going to run out of tears at some point, they still kept rolling. The thought of how Dean was at the moment and what was going to happen the next morning made your heart stop beating inside your chest. And it was not just the thought of Dean dying but you having to live a life without him that made you want to die as well. You could now understand what he meant that day on your birthday.  
  
You closed your eyes for a second, letting out a trembling breath and clenching the silken sheets in your hands. You buried your face even more in your pillow and took in a deep breath, even for a second feeling as if you were back to the morning with Dean. Just Dean. Him holding you protectively in his arms and you burying your face in his chest, breathing in his scent and feeling his presence close to you. Safe and sound. Nothing being able to hurt him. You bit your lip to keep the sobs in, knowing that it was not the truth and that no matter how much you tried you were not going back to that moment. You were never even going to relive that moment. There would never be a moment like that again. Because there would not be any more Dean to have that kind of moments with.  
And oh did that hurt.  
  
A sound in the deafening silence that had surrounded you made your eyes snap open. You frowned slightly, holding your breath to not even let the sound of your sobs and sniffles disturb it. Wanting and wishing to hear the sound again. The sound of hope.  
  
And sure it was there again.  
  
Metal clashing against metal. Groans followed by groans. And then two loud thuds and- Silence again. Until of course the door burst open and you found yourself jump. Your eyes slightly widened but you immediately relaxed when you locked eyes with the person that had just invaded.  
  
“Come on” he said with a small smile, and you couldn’t help a small frown.  
  
“Where?” you asked the blue-eyed king.  
  
“Just where you want to” he smiled and you couldn’t help a small and tentative smile of your own as he helped you up from your bed.  
  
He drapped a dark cape over your shoulders, pulling the hood over your head. He was ready to leave but you stopped him taking hold of his hand “Thank you, Henry” you whispered.  
  
“You do not have to thank me (Y/n). I am merely doing this for you” he said softly, brushing a few stray tears off your cheeks and you smiled at him.  
  
You jumped, wrapping your arms around him and only buried your face in his chest; hugging him closely and him doing the same “Thank you” you could only murmur.  
  
He pulled away, giving you a nod and smile and after checking outside the door for anybody he took hold of your hand and you both left before anybody could stop you.  
  
You had and needed to see him.  
  
~*~  
  
If you felt as if your heart had stopped beating earlier at your father’s words it now felt to shatter inside your chest. You clenched your jaw as you looked around the cell Dean was being held. The bars were rusty and you noticed a small puddle of water on the floor created from the still-falling-drops of the previous downpour. The ground was a mixture of mud and leaves and something else you couldn’t point your finger on.  
  
He was sitting on the floor, the what-was-supposed-to-be-a-bed just a few feet away from him but obviously him having chosen the ground as amuch better option than the bed that looked about to give away any given moment. You felt your heart tighten in your chest as you saw the look on his face. His eyes were cast down and you hurt at seeing the pain in them. Maybe regret? You fear to think of that.  
  
The small noise your feet made as you walked towards him caught his attention, mostly seeing as the only two guards were outside in the main entrance of the cells. It was still a surprise how they had let you and Henry in. Sure they had no particular reason to not let Henry in but with you it was a surprise. They either had not noticed your or had but did not know that you were specifically not allowed to be here.  
  
Dean’s eyes widened as soon as he saw your face, even in the dim light provided by a small torch on the wall. You pulled down the hood of your cape, your hands trembling as you took in the condition Dean was in. You put a hand in front of your mouth to keep the sob from escaping. Dean got up and came closer to the bars, now the only thing separating you.  
  
“(Y/n)?” he breathed out, disbelief lacing his voice as he looked at you with wide eyes as if he was seeing some illusion.  
  
“Oh Dean” you breathed out in a trembling voice, unable to keep a sob.  
  
You rushed towards the bars, gripping two of them so much that your knuckles turned white. Dean stared in disbelief at you for a while but soon seemed to come to realization and rushed to close the distance, coming as close as possible to you. You were rather thankful for the wide distance between the bars that allowed Dean to slightly rest his forehead against yours, his hands coming to rest upon yours. He let out a trembling breath that made you choke on a sob. Dean had never been so broken before and it hurt more than you could ever imagine. He kissed your forehead resting his chin on top of your head, looking over at Henry standing a few feet behind you.  
  
He smiled at him ever so faintly, just like Henry did.  
  
“Thank you” he mouthed to him and he only nodded his head at him with a smile as if to brush it off as nothing. Dean held his gaze for a while until he closed his eyes, letting out a sigh.  
  
One of his hands moved up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing over it. His face moved down so that it was just a few inches away from yours. His lips pressed to yours in a need-y kiss, his desperation showing through it. Even when he detached his lips from yours they still lingered close to yours, his breath fanning over your face. You closed your eyes tight shut, clenching your teeth to keep yourself from crying more.  
  
“I’m sorry. I’m so so sorry” your voice cracked.  
  
Dean smiled despite his pain “No, no. It’s not your fault. It’s never your fault princess” he whispered.  
  
“Don’t. Don’t say that word again.” you gritted your teeth.  
  
Dean opened his eyes and looked at you with a frown.  
  
“It’s my title. It’s all because of that damn title. It’s all because I am the fucking princess that you and I can’t be together. It’s because of that that you are here, being used like some low common criminal. It’s because of that that you are going to-” the lump that formed in your throat prevented you from completing your sentence.  
  
Maybe a small part of you hoped that Dean had not realized it just yet. What was to come for him.  
  
“Die” he simply completed your sentence and you could not help a sharp inhale as you looked at him with a frown.  
  
“It’s ok. It’s ok.” he smiled in such a broken way “I’m ok with it. If this-” he brushed his thumb over your cheek “-is the way I die then I am ok with it. I am content with the fact that if this is the reason I die then I will go happy. Complete. After having had the chance to be with you even for a little while. I know I will die-” you cut him off before he could finish his sentence.  
  
“Don’t. Don’t say it. Please” your tears glistened with tears “ _Please_ ” you begged “I’m not going to let this happen. I’m not going to let you die. I will do whatever I have to. Fight my father if need be”  
  
“No” he shook his head “No you won’t. And you are not going to.” he let out a sigh “(Y/n), I’ve come face to face with death plenty of times in my life. Every time I was on the verge of giving up, not having the strength to keep going. Not finding a purpose. And so I was content with dying. That I somehow deserved it. But now- now I know that if I died because of this and this way then that’s more than ok because I had finally found that one purpose. I’ve lived something that even as I am down in the pit will keep me going. Your memory and all that we shared is far more important andnow- now that I have that I know I am completely content with dying.”  
  
“Dean” you choked on a sob, tears streaming down your face.  
  
“No, hey hey” he tried to soothe you “Do you think this is really a picture to bid me goodbye with?” he let a small chuckle “I mean, of course you still look pretty even when crying but I don’t really wanna be having that memory down there, you know.”  
  
“Hey, who knows. You might go to heaven” you let out a chuckle, mixed with a sob.  
  
He chuckled, shaking his head “I highly doubt it”  
  
“I don't” you said a little more firmly, rubbing your thumb over his cheek “I don't” you repeated, shaking your head.  
  
“I guess. Maybe I’ll hope that one day I’ll see you then” he added with a small shrug and rather pained smile.  
  
“Maybe-” you choked on a sob, your body starting to shake as more tears kept streaming down your face.  
  
“Oh no, no. No, hey, sweetheart. No. Sshh” he murmured reassuringly, kissing your cheek softly and resting his forehead against yours.  
  
“I- I can’t Dean. I- I can’t let you go. I don’t want to let you go. Oh gosh” you breathed out shakily “This is my fault. This is all my fault. If I had not done anything then you wouldn’t- wouldn’t be about to lose your life.”  
  
“What?” his voice was barely audible “No, no. Hey it’s not your fault, ok? It is not your fault. If you want to blame anybody then blame me. And if you can’t then- blame the both of us. Yeah? It was mutual after all. Besides I  _clearly_ remember last night being the both of us huh?” he smirked, though his watery eyes gave out his true feelings.  
  
You let out a small giggle that just turned into a sob and you did not even try to keep the faint smile that had spread on your lips there anymore.  
  
“No” you whispered “No, I can’t let this happen. I won’t let this happen.” you shook your head, speaking firmly.  
  
Dean let out a small sigh “(Y/n), no. You won’t do anything. You can’t do anything. Please promise me you won’t go against your father.” he saw you clench your jaw at the mention of your father “It is not his fault. He’s just doing what he thinks is best for you, you must understand him.”  
  
“You’re defending him? He’s just ordered for your execution- your  _death_  and you are defending him?” you could not help your anger.  
  
He let out a sigh “It doesn’t matter anymore. Does it? It has been decided after all. And I am not going to try to change it. I am not going to let him just use what we had as a crime against me- that is much sure but-” he let a sigh “I am going to accept it as well. I am never going to regret what you and I had. But I’ve come to terms with that. As long as it is you that are going to live then- I am content with it. Just… promise me that you’ll try to behappy. No. That you are going to be happy. You’re going to live your life to the fullest and that one day you’re going to be with someone-” younoticed how he looked behind you, obviously at Henry, for quite long before looking back at you “-someone that you love.”  
  
You breathed in and out deeply as you looked at him with pursed lips. You finally opened your mouth and spoke “I… won’t promise you anything. I can’t promise you anything. Because I am going to be happy. I know it. Just like I am going to be with someone I love” you said as firmly as you could “Because I am going to be with you. You will be alive and safe and sound. With me. And if need be, away from this place.”  
  
“(Y/n)” he sighed, but you could see the small spark in his eyes that told you how he wanted that as well.  
  
“Don’t you want to?” you asked him before he could say more.  
  
His lips pursed together as his eyes looked back and forth between yours. It was obvious how he wanted to say yes. His mind screamed for him to say no, to make this less hard on you. To make this as easy as possible for you to say goodbye and not blame yourself for the rest of your life for his death. To make this as sweet of a memory as possible and not painful for you. But then- then there was that small part of his heart- no, almost his entire being wanted to say yes. He wanted so much to say yes, that he wanted to be with you. For the rest of his life that he, for the first time, hoped it would last long. He wanted so much to say how he now wished to not die. He, Dean Winchester, for the first time was scared of death. Because he knew that that meant a place without you. And that was something that scared the hell out of him. He, for the first time, as he faced death wished for a few more seconds in case it all changed and wouldn’t have to say goodbye to life for good. He, for the first time, found something in life that was worth living for, that was worth fighting for. And that was you. And the love he, Dean Winchester, for the first time in his life felt for you.  
  
“Hells yeah” he breathed out, his voice almost cracking.  
  
A smile spread on his face, despite his shining with tears eyes, as he even felt the pain in the smile.  
  
You smiled in a broken way as well, the tears still streaming your face. Not that they had ever stopped for well. You rubbed your thumb over his cheek as you both slowly started to lean in, your lips meeting in a soft kiss that-  
  
-Was cut short by the noise of the main doors slamming open and heavy footsteps echoing. Coming closer. Dangerously closer.  
  
You and Dean both immediately pulled away. Your eyes widened as you looked at the direction the sound of the footsteps was heard coming from.  
  
“No” you breathed out, your eyes widening at the sight of your father walking with a straight posture and three guards followed by him.  
  
He looked at you with an almost cold expression and you clenched your jaw “Take him” he commanded and without waiting a second you moved forward to block their way and therefore access to Dean’s cell.  
  
“No, you’re not-” you did not have time to complete your sentence, letting out a huff of air and then growl as one of the guards took hold of you and dragged you away.  
  
“No!” you screamed, struggling in his grasp, kicking and fighting for him to let you go. Your eyes widened even more when the other guards opened the cell and took hold of Dean’s arms each.  
  
He struggled, growling and even fighting back for them to let him go but he didn’t do much seeing as his main focus was on you. You fought against the guard holding you to let you go but of course he didn’t.  
  
Dean turned to look at your father with an almost clenched jaw as the guards tied his hands behind his back with the rope they had brought with them.  
  
“Let her go” he said with a hard look, the guard holding you tightening his grip on your arms almost painfully much.  
  
“I will. When all of this is over.” your father replied, his posture straight as he looked at Dean.  
“And when’s that exactly going to happen?” a small sarcastic smirk was on Dean’s lips.  
  
“Tonight” your father replied curtly and your eyes widened even more.  
  
“I wanted to make her believe that you execution was going to take place tomorrow morning so that she would have to do all this to come and stop it but as it seems she beat me at it.” your father let out a sigh “I’m sorry Dean. Know that if I could do anything to prevent this I would but- you went against the rules. What you did was… unacceptable. And you must pay for it.”  
  
“Obviously” Dean rolled his eyes at him.  
  
Your father let out a somewhat sad sigh, shaking his head slightly. He looked at the guards holding Dean and gave them a nod which only made them move. Dean originally struggled as they kept pushing and trying to drag him away.  
  
“No!” you screamed and having finally had enough you tried to fight off the guard even more. In the end you elbowed him in the stomach and as he groaned and huffed you hit him in the face as well which lead to him stumbling and losing his grip on you. Once free you rushed forward, trying to fight off one of them and thanks to Henry’s help you managed to have one to the ground and the other standing still, not making a single move as his sword now held by Henry was placed on his throat.  
  
You quickly rushed forward and wrapped your arms around Dean’s bent form on the floor where he had ended up after being rather violently pushed from one of the guards.  
  
“No!” you said and the first guard you had fought off and that was about to intervene stopped on his tracks- after of course a pointed glare from your father.  
  
“No” you repeated with a shake of your head. You opened your eyes, looking for a little while at Dean and then up at you father “I’m not going to let you do this.”  
  
“(Y/n) stop. Now.” your father tried to command you.  
  
“I’m not going to take any orders from you and if you do anything to Dean I never will again” you spoke as firmly as you could and at the same time trying to keep your anger.  
  
“Because I will not be there for you to order me” you added in a dead serious voice tone and your father’s eyes widened for a second.  
  
“If you so much as hurt Dean much less kill him I swear- no, I promise to you that you will no longer have a daughter to call princess. I will kill myself and be sure that I keep my promises”  
“(Y/n), please. Stop this now and we will talk it out. This is madness” he tried to reason with you.  
  
“No. No it’s not. And we have nothing to talk about. I am not going to let you hurt him. I tried to speak to you, I pleaded for you to let him go but you didn’t! You didn’t listen to me! And now you’re sending him for execution?! No I’m not going to let you! I’m not going to allow this!” you screamed, some tears even running down your cheeks.  
  
“(Y/n). You do not know what you’re talking about. Please-” you cut him off before he could finish his sentence.  
  
“No! No you don’t. You don’t know what you’re saying and doing! Look around you! Look at me and look at Dean! Dean- he is your most trusted knight. You love him as if he was your own son because you practically raised him and now you have ordered his own death?! You have ordered the death of the man that would fight and has fought with his own life for yours and mine as well! I can’t let you do this- I won’t let you do this! If you kill Dean then- then be ready to kill me as well. And if you don’t then I will. I won’t stand to live without him because I simply can’t live without him!” you were screaming at the top of your lungs for him to hear now, your face burning hot and eyes puffy for sure from the constant crying… but you didn’t care anymore.  
  
“And that’s what you don’t get” your voice was much lower and raspy, sobs shaking your body “I refuse to live without him because I… I love him. I love him with everything I’ve got-” you looked at Dean whose own eyes were filled with tears, both of you sensing the end far approaching. He smiled, even as one tear rolled down his cheek and closing his eyes he rested his forehead against yours.  
  
“I love him, dad” your voice cracked “I love him more than I thought I ever would in my life and more than I thought it was even possible. If that is not enough reason to keep him alive and him being a simple knight will somehow ruin the reputation of the kingdom then-” you took in a shaky breath looking back up at him “-then you will have to kill us both. Because I refuse to keep living without Dean by my side. Because he is the only one I want- the only one I love and always will.”  
“I love him, dad” your voice had a pleading tone in it but you could not help it either in the situation you were “I- I know that he is not the prince you always dreamed for me or- or someone of royal blood. Rich and with power b- but he makes me happy. He makes me happy more than anybody and completes me. I- I know he’s just a simple knight but- but he cares about me. I- I know it” you turned to look at Dean who smiled at you broadly “He loves me.” you whispered “He’s all I’d ever ask for and much more. He means the world to me. And if I am not with him- If I don’t live with him then it’s better if I don’t live at all.”  
  
You closed your eyes, resting your forehead against Dean’s. You let out a shaky sigh, the tears had by now stopped and some part of you felt content that even if you died now with Dean then you’d still be ok because you had been able to tell him what you wanted for all this time. Dean took in a deep inhale as well, pressing a soft kiss on your cheek. Your eyes opened just slightly as you looked at him, your one hand now cupping his face.  
  
“I love you too” his voice was low and rough but you could see how much he meant those words just by looking in his eyes that, despite everything, now shone even more brightly.  
  
You smiled, despite your pain and nodded your head. You kissed him softly on the lips and once pulling away you turned to look at you father, Dean doing the same. The both of you facing whatever was to come. Better or worse.  
  
“It is up to you now” you said, looking your father dead in the eyes.  
  
As he only thought of what decision to make. Death or not…  
  
…for the both of you?


	17. Chapter 17

And it all was so obvious as you and Dean walked, holding hands, down the small forest. Your father had made his decision and it was all well-accepted by you and Dean.  
  
You turned your head to look at him with a small smile that got just a little bigger as you saw his forest-green orbs shining brightly and his freckles like small stars shining because of the warm mid-day light shining over him. It was such abeautiful day. Pretty warm, but not too much. There were birds singing in the far distance as you could hear and even a small warm breeze was blowing. The rustling of the leaves gave you such a relaxed feeling that you just could not help but remember that one first time you had come with Dean here and were about to kiss. It was all before everything had started. Before all of this had started. But now it was over- It was going to be over. During such a beautiful say… it actually felt a shame that you were both going to die on such a day.  
  
Dean’s hand took hold of yours, both your hands were bound together by a rope attached to a longer one that a soldier in front of you had hold of. You smiled ever so faintly at Dean looking deeply in his shining eyes- shining because of the welled up tears. But he refused to shed them and so did you. Your father had made his decision and you were both willing to accept it. Well, Dean had raised objections of course when the first words had been said but you were not taking no for an answer.  
  
 _“Very well” your father had said, all emotion draining from his face and eyes.  
  
“If this is what you want. Then so shall be it. You will be both be hanged tomorrow morning at the forest and till then you shall spend your last few hours here with him. Just so that you see what you are giving your life for.” he hissed the last words, his voice dripping with venom, as if it was filth.  
  
“No” Dean had breathed out “No! No don’t you dare!” he had snapped, quickly getting on his feet but being held back by soldiers before he could make a move, you as well.  
  
“You won’t do this” you had never heard this much fear in Dean’s voice before.  
  
“She asked for it herself and that is how it’s going to be” your father had looked at Dean with such a hard look “You will both die. And you-” he had approached Dean, looking at him dead serious “-will die with her blood in your hands. Because it will be you that have caused her death.”  
  
And he had dismissed you after that, ordering the soldiers to lock the both of you up and of course some to guard Henry’s room so that he would not escape and try to save you._  
  
So here you were now. Walking the final steps to your death. Brought to you by your own father, oh wasn’t that pure luck.  
  
He smiled ever so faintly at you as well but you could see the pain through it. You knew very well why that was.  
  
“We’re going to be together” you whispered, just like you had done the previous night “I’m not going to let you go on the other side without me.”  
  
“So I’m pretty much stuck with you for an eternity?” the corners of his lips lifted just slightly.  
  
“Hey!” you said still in a low and slightly hoarse voice “I should be the one complaining” you let out a humorless chuckle that was cut by a sob, even if you tried to hold it back.  
  
Dean’s smile immediately fell as even a tear slipped your eyes. You quickly brushed it off, trying to act brave but it was near impossible. Your throat felt tight and your eyes stung with tears. But it was not only because of the fact that you were about to die. It was because of the fear of being without him. Not being with Dean was a thought that made your heart tighten insufferably inside your chest.  
  
Dean opened his mouth, ready to speak. His own face had fell and you could see his own lower lip tremble. He was ready to speak but before he could dare utter a word he was jerked forward by the rope tied to his hands, just like you were. You stumbled a little, almost falling which actually made Dean glare hard at them, a small growl leaving his lips.  
  
You both soon had walked the small stairs up to the gallows. You looked straight in the eyes of your father as he stood a few feet away, a cold look in his eyes- not a single regret. You had come to the point to think that you did not recognize this man anymore. You did not see your mother here, and you didn’t have to guess that he had (like with Henry) ordered to keep her inside till all of this was over. You could see him still glaring at Dean but he turned his head from him to look at one of the soldiers that was there close to you.  
  
He nodded his head, the soldier doing the same. Not many words were said but they weren’t needed anyway. He moved so that he placed the noose around your necks. Now it hang loose but you knew that it soon would not be this way. Inactual reality it had started to feel a little tight, as you felt as if you could not even swallow properly, although it was not near that. The soldier moved to the side as he took hold of the handle there. He squeezed it tight, ready to move it.  
  
In just the few seconds left you turned your head to look at Dean who had his own head turned, already looking at you. You both smiled at each other, just a small way of trying to reassure each other. You wanted to reach out to him, to even hold his hand but you couldn’t with how they had tied your hands. You only looked at each other deeply in the eyes, not for a second wanting to break eye contact. Even till your last moments. You were going to die, yes. The both of you, yes. By your own father at that, yes. But if you died and had as a last image each other then- things did not seem all so bad.  
  
“I love you” you whispered, your voice hoarse.  
  
 _The soldier squeezed the handle more tight._  
  
“I love you too” he whispered back.  
  
 _He turned his head to look at your father._  
  
“Always?” you asked back in a whisper.  
  
 _Your father gave him a nod.  
_  
“Always and forever, sweetheart” he smirked just slightly and reassuringly.  
  
 _And he pulled the handle.  
_  
 _The floor beneath you opened and in a swift movement it felt as if the entire ground was swept from your feet and you-  
 **  
Woke up with a jolt.**_  
  
Your eyes were wide and your heart was beating rapidly in your chest. It felt ready to break out of it and you put a hand on top of it. You tried to take in deep breaths to sooth yourself down.  
  
It was all a dream.  
 _  
Of course_ you thought as a smile spread on your lips.  
  
“Baby?” a voice next to you was heard and you immediately turned your head to look at him.  
  
You met the worried eyes of Dean Winchester.  
  
“Hey, sorry. I woke you up, didn’t I?” you whispered apologetically.  
  
“Mhm Hadn’t fallen asleep properly yet” he shrugged slightly, a small grin on his lips as he ran his hand down your bare arm, moving it to ran his fingers down your bare spine.  
  
You smiled sheepishly down at him, a small blush creeping up your cheeks and you tightened the hold of the silk sheet over your bare chest.  
  
“Sorry again, though” you mumbled as you moved so that you could lay back down next to him, laying your head on his bare chest.  
  
“What was it about?” he asked in a low voice.  
  
“Nothing, it was nothing” you shook your head, trying to brush it off.  
  
Dean tightened slightly his grip on you “(Y/n)” he sighed “I’ve had a fair amount of nightmares myself, most of them being these weeks for that matter. It is not nothing” he insisted.  
  
You let a small sigh “I- It was a nightmare. You- you and I got hanged. We died. That’s all.” you ended up whispering.  
  
Dean’s hold on you tightened a little bit and you let out a small content sigh. He kissed your forehead softly and you closed your eyes for a second.  
  
“It was just a dream” he whispered soothingly “It was just a dream. None of that was real”  
  
You nodded your head at him “I know. I know.” you opened your eyes to look up at him “It’s just- I’m still a little shaken after all of that” you shrugged slightly.  
  
“I know” he whispered in a rough voice. It had been just a few hours ago that he was locked inside a cell and now – as much hard as it was – he was here with you. Holding you and not letting go ever again.  
  
Who would have thought that all it took was for you to say how you actually felt to convince your father that you truly loved him. Your father seemed reluctant for a second but when he could really see how you felt about Dean there really was no choice for him to make. You were going to live just like Dean would. The two of you together.  
  
Dean kissed your forehead softly. He kissed again a little lower and lower till his lips moved to your cheek and then he placed a kiss on your lips. And another. And another.  
  
“Maybe I could do something to make you feel a little better?” you could hear and feel the small smirk on his lips.  
  
You let out a small giggle, proceeding to hum “Mhm somebody wants a second round?” you mumbled in between the kisses.  
  
“You mean third? Or wait fourth? Maybe more. I’ve really lost count with you” he said, a deep chuckle leaving his lips, his chest rumbling making you giggle yourself.  
  
“I think fourth, now that you’re talking about it” you mumbled, as he moved to kiss your neck “But I’m kinda sore so-maybe if we could, you know, in the morning…?” you ended up asking, looking up at him a little shyly but he only smiled down at you, warmly.  
  
“It’s ok. Only when you want to” he said, kissing your forehead.  
  
“Thank you” you whispered as he laid back down, pulling your body close to his again and you rested your head on his chest again, his arms moving to wrap around your form.  
  
You let out a small content sigh, closing your eyes momentarily just enjoying the warmth Dean provided you.  
  
“You know-” his voice broke the silence, making your eyes open to look up at him.  
  
He chuckled a little to himself before speaking again “You scared the hell outta me down there” you could not help a small giggle at hearing him speak the way he usually did, no formalities.  
  
“I- I got scared that for a moment he was going to-” he swallowed, the frown evident on his features “That he was going to say yes and decide to kill us both. And it’s not that I am scared about me, it’s- it’s you- it’s you that I don’t even wanna think of something happening to” he ended up whispering, his eyes looking up at the ceiling or around at the curtains of the bed, but not at you.  
  
Your body stiffen just slightly and you pursed your lips in a thin line, a frown set on your face as well.  
  
“Would you-” you swallowed “Would you ever consider, stopping this before it all came down to that? Me begging my father for both our lives?” you asked tentatively.  
  
He glanced at you for a second, letting out a sigh “I would never consider stopping this for anything” he let a small chuckle soon after that “Which is ironic cause I actually did, once. But- Truth is if I’d ever consider stopping this forever?No. No I wouldn’t. Call me selfish o-or greedy but I just- I guess you could say I am addicted”  
  
“… To me?” you breathed out, biting your lip,  
  
He looked down at you, a wide grin spread on his face- or more like a smirk “That surprised?” he raised an eyebrow “You’re pretty much addictive, you know” his voice was lower than before, his one hand running over your bare waist.  
  
Goosebumps created all over your skin and you bit your lip, looking away from him shyly; a dark blush rising up our cheeks “Dean” you moaned slightly.  
  
“I love it when you say my name that way” he almost purred in pleasure, pressing his lips to your cheek.  
  
“Dean” you almost whined this time, hiding your face at the crook of his neck.  
  
He laughed out loudly at this, kissing the top of your head this time and moving to lay back down on his back, his eyes looking at the ceiling again.  
  
“But you know, now that I think about it. Maybe there is one thing that would make me want to stop this” he let out a rather sad sigh, his eyes closing for a moment.  
  
“A-and that would be?” you really did not know if you wanted to hear the answer or not.  
  
“What you want” he breathed out, glancing at you for a second.  
  
“When you were with Henry I- I actually thought for a second that there was no point in fighting for you. You-” he sighed “It was obvious how you wanted him. Only him and honestly that was hard to take. I watched you fall for him more and more and I just could not take it. But you looked happy and I thought that if at least you were happy then so should I. Hard yeah I know but- if you think about it with him you actually where whereas with me you were always either hiding or having to be careful not to be seen. Really, when the heck did I ever make you happy without you having to worry? About the both of us at that” he shook his head “I thought for a second that finally you were getting what you actually deserved, _somebody_ you actually deserved. All I could do was bring you pain and-”  
  
“Dean” you wanted to shout at him but it only came out breathlessly and almost in horror. It instantly got his attention and he turned his head to look at you, stopping what he was saying. He frowned at you and you, with pursed lips and a deep frown, shook your head at him.  
  
“No” you whispered “No.”  
  
You brought one hand up and cupped his cheek. As he was about to open his mouth and question you, you pressed your lips to his. His eyes fluttered shut, he did not move for a little while and only let you kiss him.  
  
“What?” he asked, pulling just slightly away to look at you with a frown. You looked down at him as you had crawled over and on top of him.  
  
“Weren’t you sore?” he raised an eyebrow.  
  
“Was. ” you pressed a kiss over his lips “Not anymore.” another on his jaw “Besides-” another under his jaw “Need-” you kissed over his jawline “-to get these fucking stupid ideas-” you peppered kisses down to his chest “-outta your mind” you licked occasionally “Now”  
  
“Really?” Dean breathed out in disbelief, mostly at what you were doing, and you looked up at him from where you were kissing his abdomen , a small smirk on your lips.  
  
“Well, I said now, didn’t I?” you smirked at him and he only grinned widely.  
  
A small chuckle left his lips “Oh I’m a terrible influence”  
  
“Nah” you shrugged, smiling widely and winking at him.  
  
It was certainly going to be a long night.  
  
~Next morning~  
  
You let a small yawn as Anna combed through your hair “You didn’t get much sleep, my princess?” she asked and you could literally hear the smirk in her voice.  
  
You giggle “Nope. Not much. But hey can you blame me?” you raised an eyebrow at her and she laughed as well.  
  
“I’m just a little sad he was not here when I woke up” you added in a mutter, looking down at your hands.  
  
“But the maids had to prepare him for breakfast princess, it is not that simple anymore. He is the future king after all.”  
  
“The maids?” you frowned.  
  
“Yes. They came this morning while you were still sleeping. Woke him up and led him to the royal baths and later onwould lead him to his new room to get him dressed. You are not to share a room before the wedding even if you already have… yeah” she chuckled to herself.  
  
“Oh is that so” she nodded her head at your words, giving you the final touches “Then maybe we can go by there if you’re done.”  
  
“Of course”  
  
~*~  
  
“No, hey- no need for that ok? I can do it myself, alright? Just- just stop for a second and listen damn it” Dean groaned in exasperation. Maybe being a royal was not an easy task in the end.  
  
“We’re sorry but we were ordered to take care of you and prepare you for the breakfast, my lord” one of the maids said, looking down. Since he was actually not a prince or had any other royal title he was always going to be addressed as my lord, till of course your wedding.  
  
“Well he can sure as hell prepare himself pretty well now.” you said, crossing your arms in front of your chest as soon as you entered the room.  
  
He seemed to let a small sigh of relief though he was too amused to care about that now. How could he not be after all?  
  
“My princess-” one of them dared to speak “But the king ordered us to-” you didn’t let her finish of course.  
  
“Forget what my father ordered you to do. I now order you to go tide my room and leave Dean on his freaking own. He’s got hands of his own, I’m sure he can take care of himself.” you said, smiling sarcastically at Dean but still glaring at him.  
  
“Y-yes my princess” she replied, giving you a bow; as did the rest and they all left the room along with Anna.  
  
You closed it as soon as the left and it didn’t take a second for your attention to be again on him as he started laughing out loudly.  
  
“Something funny?” you raised an eyebrow at him, lips pursed in a thin line and hands on your hips.  
  
“Well actually-” he could hardly keep his laughter “You know you didn’t have to snap at them like that. Poor girl seemed about to have a heart attack from looking at your glare. Maybe thought you were going to kill her.”  
  
“Excuse me?” you scoffed.  
  
“Come on they were just trying to do their job, maybe a little unsuccessfully since I was not co-operating but- still.” he shrugged, though the wide grin was still on his face.  
  
“Of course they were” you rolled your eyes “Which is why you are standing half naked right here”  
  
Dean laughed “Oh is that a hint of jealousy I’m seeing there?” a wide smirk covered his lips, especially as he saw your eyes widen for a second.  
  
You laughed, rolling your eyes “As if”  
  
“Oh but I think you are” he teased you, taking a few small steps closer to you.  
  
“Shut up” you grumbled “I’m not jealous”  
  
“Ok ok” he raised his hands in surrender “Whatever you say”  
  
“I’m not, Dean!” you insisted “I just don’t get why they would have to- to do all that and- you’re practically naked- half naked, ok details. But point is- that- that-” you groaned in frustration “Just shut up! I’m not jealous, alright? I’m not!”  
  
“Alright! Alright! I didn’t say you were. Nope” he shrugged, pretending innocent.  
  
“But if I must say…” he came even closer to you, a smirk on his lips “You look absolutely adorable when you’re _not_ jealous” he grinned widely as you groaned in frustration.  
  
You were about to turn and leave but he caught you in the middle of that, his arms encircling your waist and not let you go. He pressed your back to his chest and you felt the deep rumble of it as he laughed wholeheartedly.  
  
“Sorry sorry” he said, still laughing slightly “Sorry” he mumbled, his face buried at the crook of your neck for a little while “It’s just-” he looked up at you with a way-too-adorable-for-your-heart-to-take look “It makes me really happy to know you feel the same”  
  
“I thought you’d know by now” you muttered, your arms still crossed over your chest; you were still playing hard.  
  
“Oh trust me after last night every inch of doubt vanished for sure” he laughed and you could not help a small smile either; though you tried to not let him see.  
  
He chuckled slightly “But what I meant is that- it’s nice to see I am not the only one getting possessive sometimes. It’s nice to know that you want me to be only yours just like I want you to be mine. And only mine.” he mumbled, pressing his lips to your neck in a soft kiss. And another. And another. And another.  
  
If it was hard to hide your smile before, it now was impossible. But that just did not mean you were going to give him the satisfaction.  
  
“Whatever” you rolled your eyes, pushing him away “Just get dressed Winchester. My father is waiting for us. And don’t take long or else-” you tried to put on a serious face, pointing a finger on him.  
  
“Just get done quickly. I’ll be waiting outside”  
  
“As you wish my princess” he said, bowing at you though a smirk was on his lips.  
  
You visibly rolled your eyes at him but tried to keep the smile at bay as much as possible.  
  
He winked at you and chuckled as you sent him a small glare, but exited the room to let him get ready on his own.  
  
~*~  
  
“Well finally!” your father exclaimed with a smile as soon as you and Dean entered the dining room.  
  
“Sorry, it took a little while to get ready” you said with a small laugh.  
  
“It better be that cause I am too young to be a grandfather already” your father said with a deep chuckle your mother laughing slightly along with him, shaking her head, and your own eyes widened.  
  
“Dad!” you hissed but Dean chuckled as well, only to earn a glare from you.  
  
It made him shut up for a second but you could still see him laugh a little when you turned your head away.  
  
“Come, seat” he gestured to you.  
  
You sighed softly, making your way to your already set place. You looked at Dean who seemed a little reluctant, thinking once again if this was where he should really seat or if he was supposed to take his place behind your father’s seat.  
  
“Dean” you said softly and his attention snapped to you “Seat” you smiled reassuringly and he nodded slowly.  
  
He took his seat next to you, but still seemed to be deep in thought, his eyes roaming the entire place; worried about everybody’s looks. That was something you felt as well so you could relate to him. But for the moment you were among your family, your loved ones and the ones hat knew you and accepted you so you did not have- you did not _want_ to think about that. You only wanted to enjoy this for now and when the time came you knew everybody would in the end accept it. And if they didn’t? Well, you did not want to care. As long as you were with Dean you had all you wanted.  
  
“Hey” you whispered softly, placing a hand over his. You only smiled at him and he did not need you to say anything to realize what you meant to say. What you were saying with your eyes.  
  
He smiled as well, letting a small sigh and you smiled even more at it. You leaned in to press your lips to his in a kiss but the second your lips touched his, he immediately pulled away. You would have laughed at the look on his face, especially the wide eyes. If you were not feeling quiet offended anyway.  
  
“What?” you asked.  
  
“What what?” he whisper-hissed “Your father’s here!” the look on his eyes was certainly one to make you laugh.  
  
“You’re kidding me right?”  
  
“What? No!” and the funniest thing was that he actually meant it.  
  
“Dean, do I need to remind you how he found us just the previous morning?”  
  
“…No.” he cleared his throat awkwardly “But even if he did, we do not have to actually show it so openly”  
  
You bit your tongue to keep yourself from snapping at him. It actually was getting too irrational.  
  
“So Dean-” your father spoke up, effectively getting your attention away “-I hope you found your new room and bedquite comfortable”  
  
Dean smiled “Uh yeah I d-”  
  
“He didn’t really have time to check it out much” you cut Dean off before he could continue “He slept at my room last night” you said casually, but actually made Dean’s eyes widen.  
  
Your father chuckled “I should have guessed”  
  
“Wow poor Dean. She’s already ruining you huh?” Arthur asked sarcastically but you could not help but have a small smile on your lips as you glared playfully at him.  
  
Dean chuckled, feeling a little more at ease “Maybe it is my doing”  
  
“Maybe” Arthur shrugged “But I feel sorry for you.”  
  
“Arthur!” Morgana exclaimed, glaring at him.  
  
“What?” he asked shrugging “I actually feel sorry for both of you now that I think about it” he seemed to talk mostly to himself.  
  
“Me and (Y/n)?” Dean frowned.  
  
“You and Sa- Ow!” he cut himself off before he could finish his sentence.  
  
“What was that for!?” he asked, turning to look at Morgana with a frown.  
  
“Just shut up and eat your breakfast” she glared at him, certainly meaning to say more than she already was.  
  
Dean could not help but frown too but you certainly had a knowing smile on your face. He shook his own head but smiled nonetheless. Maybe Arthur’s jokes were a little out of taste, or at least for Morgana anyway. Mostly because she did not want anyone else to know anything about her and Sam but the end result was Dean relaxing so that was what mattered. He seemed more at ease now. It didn’t look as if he felt out of place completely.  
  
“Forgive Arthur, Dean” your mother spoke to him with a gentle smile.  
  
Dean smiled just barely “It’s ok. I don’t mind. I actually appreciate your trying to make me comfortable.” he shrugged.  
  
“Dean” she sighed “There is absolutely no need to thank us. You are part of the family. You always were, now it’s just more official”  
  
“Yeah… probably not the way it should though” he clenched his jaw, looking down at his own food and you let a sigh of your own. Before you could speak though, your father did.  
  
“It is just the right way, Dean” your father spoke in a firm but a little sad voice tone “I know-” he stopped himself for a moment and looked down “I know that they way I acted at first was not right. I felt guilty about it from the beginning, don’t doubt about it. I only forced myself to do what I was about to because I thought it was the right thing to do. I did not want it in the least bit, though, please believe that.” he looked at him sincerely. It didn’t even surprise you how he was being so honest and open with Dean, seeing as he saw him as a son more than just another knight.  
  
“It is not hard to understand” Dean mumbled, turning his head to look at you with a barely visible smile. Maybe a sad one at that.  
  
“But do not doubt that despite everything I would have never wanted it to be any different” he looked at him fully in the eyes “I had my doubts in the beginning, yes, and that was what led me to do what I did. For what I am sorry Dean. But I luckily realized that you meant a lot to her. I do not care of your status Dean, you’ve known me your entire life to know that what I really think and that what I really want is for my family to be happy.”  
  
The corner of Dean’s mouth lifted to a half smile “I remember you saying how you’d always do everything for them. How you’d be willing to give your life for the ones you loved. I didn’t know much then, but I now understand” he nodded his head.  
  
You smiled slightly, placing your hand on top of his and linking fingers with his. Dean giving you a small squeeze.  
  
“Trust me. The only reason that made be willing to do what I was about to was only because I wanted to protect her. Not your status, not who you are but only her. But knowing- knowing that you truly love her and so does she, I do not have any reason anymore to not want you with her.” he smiled “I’ll be honest a prince would have been a good choice-” he added.  
  
“Dad!” you exclaimed, irritated.  
  
He chuckled “I’m kidding. Just kidding. As long as you two are happy then so am I. Besides, I know you will do a good job at ruling the kingdom. I taught you well”  
  
“Glad to know that then” Dean smiled in appreciation, nodding his head.  
  
Your father did the same, with silence following shortly afterwards.  
  
.  
  
..  
  
…  
  
“So… if I get this right, our sweet and innocent princess jumped yo-”  
  
“Arthur!” both you and Morgana exclaimed, effectively cutting him off before he could say much.  
  
Dean’s eyes were a little wide but an amused grin was starting to appear on his lips.  
  
“Welcome to the family Dean” your mother said with an awkward smile and you let out a sigh.  
  
But good thing was that Dean actually laughed, so it was enough for you to smile anyway.  
  
And the rest of the morning was luckily uneventful, just like the entire day and-  
  
~Time Skip~  
  
You let out an almost shaky sigh as you looked at your reflection in the mirror. It had been so long it was impossible to comprehend. All those months felt like just a few hours and now the minutes as you waited felt like centuries. It felt like you were centuries away from that moment. From him.  
  
It was so hard to understand but as your heart hammered in your chest like never before, as you could barely hear anything else from the blood rushing to your ears, your breath hitching on your throat and your lungs hurting and protesting for air but you still refused to breath in- you honestly could not think about all the time that had passed and how quickly that was. Because the moment had- was about to come and you could certainly not keep the smile away from your lips anymore.  
  
The memories were all in a blur as they flashed by your eyes. They were so many, both happy and sad. From the moment you first laid eyes on Dean, to him locking his with yours, to the first time you heard his voice; so deep that it shook you to the core, to your name leaving his lips for the first time and then those lips touching yours for the first time. And then another time. And another. And another. His lips and then his hands being all over you in all those secret places as you hid from everyone and everything. The feeling he gave you was still there as you thought back to those moments. And then the feelings of when he left you were there as well. But it all vanished, it all went away as the memory of being in his arms again made your heart swell and the smile get even bigger. You cheeks really hurt by now.  
  
So many memories. They all became blurred as you thought about it. From happy to sad ones. There had been some difficult times, even when you got together again. It was hard for the kingdom, some of them at least, to accept how you and Dean were together. Mostly because Dean would not stop beating himself about it. It really took you so many times-nights basically to convince him you would never want anybody else but him. No prince, no king but only him. Just the way he was. He seemed to believe you sometimes but even when he did not you would never stop but want to show him that he was the only one you wanted.  
  
And just like him, so did the rest of the kingdom get used to the situation. Most of them after all knew him already and really thought he would be an ideal king. And that was a moment that was going to come soon. After this one. After the seconds-centuries passed and the door opened.  
  
Arthur walked in smiling at you and placed two hands over your shoulders “Ready?” he asked and you nodded, nerves setting in more than ever before.  
  
What bride wouldn’t feel nervous right before their own wedding after all?  
  
~*~  
  
The butterflies went crazy in your stomach as you realized that there were just a few steps and you’d be standing right next to Dean and in front of your father, ready to be married. Your nerves were getting the best of you and you started to feel a little dizzy but then again you knew fully well it was just not the nerves.  
  
You knew after all that you should get used to this even after the wedding. For the rest few months after all waking up to feeling dizzy and almost throwing up every morning was going to be your routine for quite a while. Maybe it was early but you knew you loved Dean so that was what only mattered to you. Having his kid was yet another gift sent from heaven. One just as precious as meeting Dean himself.  
  
You squeezed Arthur’s hand without realizing it and he did the same to give you some encouragement. He smiled reassuringly “It’s going to be ok”  
  
You nodded your head, a little absentminded but still smiling widely nonetheless “Yeah” you breathed out, not being able to unlocked your eyes from Dean’s. The grin plastered on his face as he waited at the top of the stairs, you were sure, was just as wide as yours.  
  
“He’s so handsome” you breathed, not only because of how he was dressed up or looked pretty much perfect in his white suit and with his hair brushed back just like that day on your birthday. It was mostly because of the wide grin spread on his lips and his eyes shining so brightly and as you got even closer you only realized that the sparkle you were seeing was because of the tears that had welled up in his eyes. No wonder, seeing as you were tearing up as well.  
  
It seemed to be impossible for the both of you to believe how after all this time, after all these struggles you were finally here. About to get married. With nobody raising an objection and you (most important) being able to fully express how you felt about each other. No hiding, no lies, no secrets. You were free. And as you realized it you began to realize how you could breathe more freely. Like there was nothing holding you back anymore. No weight on your shoulders. No pain making your heart feel heavy like a rock. Nothing.  
  
“Hey” Dean whispered, leaning to give you a kiss on the cheek.  
  
You giggled slightly “Hey” you breathed out with a big smile.  
  
“You look stunning” he said in just a low voice, looking down at your wedding dress for a second.  
  
“You’re not so bad yourself” you said cheekily and he chuckled deeply.  
  
Dean opened his mouth to speak but your father clearing his throat cut him off before he could say anything. That was mainly the reason why he had not accompanied you to Dean. He was going to be the one to carry the ceremony.  
  
“We-” he spoke in a loud and clear voice, and you both turned to look at him, Dean quick to take a hold of your hand and the corners of your lips immediately curled up in a smile , especially as you noticed the smirk on Dean’s lips “-have gathered here to join the lives of two people-”  
  
You didn’t really hear anything more after that and you were pretty sure Dean didn’t either as he constantly kept sneaking glances at you. You did the same and when your eyes locked he’d only wink at you with a cheeky smile.  
  
“I love you” you heard him whisper and as soon as you turned your head you saw him looking directly back at you, his eyes holding an emotion that made your heart swell in your chest.  
  
You could not do anything else but smile back at him, a shaky breath leaving your lips for a moment.  
  
“I love you too…” the corners of your lips pulled into a smile as you realized the true feeling of pure happiness you felt at being with Dean. You were going to be with him for the rest of your life now.  
  
“… my knight in shining armor”  
  
 _The End_


End file.
